Is it possible that God doesn't want me to get confession?

I have commited a mortal sin that calls to Heavans for revange and it seemed to me that God made my confession impossible. Is it possible that God is punishing me by stopping making confession practically impossible (under reasonable condition) and letting me in this disgousting state of mortal sin? Maybe God is preventing invalid “confession” (I have problems with contrition)?
SORRY FOR BAD ENGLISH!

Hi. Let me offer you a couple of things. First, from the way you are wording your question, it sounds to me like you are beating yourself up just a bit too much. Is sin ugly? To be sure. But, God’s mercy has triumphed! The only thing we have to fear or be ashamed of is the refusal to acknowledge our need of God’s mercy.

Second, to directly answer your question, no, God is not making your confession impossible. Say a simple prayer, “Lord, I desire to be in right relationship with you. Please give me the opportunity to make a good and humble confession today.” Remember, God is not vengeful. Heaven rejoices more over one repentant sinner, than over 99 who have no need of repentance, the Scriptures tell us. So, if you’re right, and God is making it impossible for you to celebrate the sacrament, He’s only limiting His own joy. Since He would have no reason to do that, God is not making it impossible for you to get to confession.

I would recommend that if your parish does not have a regular confession time, you call the office of your parish, and simply ask to schedule an appointment with the priest for confession. Every priest I know of, myself included, would be very willing to make time to celebrate the sacrament with someone. But, sometimes it just requires being a little proactive. Hopefully, this help. Blessings to you.

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