A french author attracted huge amounts of condemnation from the media recently after he said that he could never be attracted to women that are close to his age. The way much of the feminist media was responding one would believe that it is a serious sin to find only younger women attractive. While it is clear that a middle aged man can not leave his wife for a younger woman it seems that our society polices the sexuality of males too much. While a man of 50 to be fair should not be expecting to be receiving much interest from 20 somethings he should not be condemned for his attractions, just in the same way a woman should not be condemned for finding Basketball players and guitarists more attractive.
Nobody is obligated to be attracted to anybody. It does, in my opinion, display shallowness and close-mindedness. I definitely don’t think he’s hardwired to only be attracted to young women.
It is likely a changeable condition that only exists as a result of pre-conceived biases and life experiences that mold him into a certain mindset. Similar biases negatively affect black women and Asian men.
Assuming we’re talking about adult women here, no, it’s not sinful. It might indicate some other issues on his part, but I don’t think it’s a sin per se.
I would disagree that it is only the sexuality of males being policed - look at public reaction to French President Macron’s wife who happens to be significantly older than him. Or back in the day to Barbara Bush, who merely looked older than George HW. Or Camilla for having an affair with Prince Charles resulting in his divorce from the much younger and more glamorous Diana.
I don’t think it’s fair to blame someone for what he or she is attracted to, and in this case I’d say the blame falls more with society for promoting the idea that only young people can be attractive, but on some level the author is unfair in dismissing women his own age. Even if he doesn’t find them physically attractive he should at least try to place some value on the minds of women too, rather than just their bodies.
Generally it’s considered unethical to sleep with another woman’s husband, and if I recall Prince Charles was heavily criticized for that too (to the point where many in Britain would rather he be passed over in the royal succession).
Not by itself (if adult women), but could indicate issues with the sin of lust. I think it’s possible to have an age gap relationship just be two people who connect, but if a man is excluvely going after women 20-30 years younger, it’s a pretty good bet he is driven by looks.
I would argue Camilla has come in for a whole extra load of vitriol even over and above that suffered by Charles.
After all, most people accept that he is Prince of Wales and (now at least) that in due course he will be King, whereas I think there would be considerable protest if she were ever called Princess of Wales, or Queen when Charles’ reign comes.
And I get a sense that his age is part of the reason that some want the throne to be passed on to William.
Why does it matter to them? Who cares?
The strategy of “I am so offended” is over done and tiresome.
I think that the statement “You can’t control who you are attracted to” once again comes in to play. What matters is what you do about it. Nothing wrong at all with marrying someone out of your age range. shrugs
I think that it is OK to marry a woman because one finds herself physically appealing. As long as the man promises to not leave his wife or refuses to have children he should not be condemned by the church so long as he is striving to live a life avoiding sin.
Youth is attractive. But dont bind yourself to such limitations.
No it’s not sinful.
Other posters find it good to say why it could be wrong in some cases. But I simply can’t say it is sinful. Anything can be wrong in some circumstances; but you can’t make this a general rule.
An instinctual urge to reproduce might be behind a 50-something man finding much younger women of child-bearing age more attractive than women closer to his own age who are nearing the end or past their child-bearing years. Nothing sinful with it, as far as I can see. After all, didn’t God say, Be fruitful and multiply.
Well, she legally is the Princess of Wales. She just uses Duchess of Cornwall. She simply does use the title Princess of Wales, but it is her title legally.
She will be Queen-consort once Prince Charles is King (legally). Though, from 2005 to 2018 their website said she would take the title Princess-consort once Charles becomes king. But they have since removed that from the website.
But make no mistake, she is legally the current Princess of Wales and would technically be Queen-consort once Charles becomes king.
But this makes my point - no-one objects to Charles using whatever titles he is legally entitled to, no matter how much of a cad or how unpopular he is.
It may be a misunderstanding on my part not being British, but I thought that as Camilla is a commoner and royal only by marriage she would actually need to be granted the title Princess - or any other title - by the reigning monarch and doesn’t have any automatic right by marriage to a title. Of course I could be wrong on that.
And I would make a large bet that the Princess thing was floated to test the waters and was taken down because of unfavourable reaction to the idea, and so may not end up happening.
Attraction is not a sin-lust is.
On a practical level, a 50 year old father may end up leaving much of the hard work of caring for demanding babies and toddlers to his 20 year old wife simply because he no longer has the energy to keep up… doesn’t make the match intrinsically wrong, but it wouldn’t always be fair to the younger partner.
Quite so, old chap.
Obviously women wouldn’t like someone voicing that kind of attitude. I would not like it either if I was a woman, I suppose.
But it certainly is not a sin.
Some aspect of it, it seems to me, is biological sexual attraction. Young women are quite fertile and able to bear children far more readily than a woman in her 40s. That’s just the way God made us.
Hope I did not say anything here to get me into too much trouble.
This is quite true. Especially if the older spouse begins to have health problems and the younger spouse is taking care of him and small children. Then there is also the issue of an older spouse having baggage from a previous marriage/children. While not sinful to only be attracted to younger women, pursuing actual relationships probably isn’t prudent.
I think this definitely hits the nail on the head.