Is it sinful to only be attracted to younger women


#43

I think it’s pretty obvious that throughout history that youth is the holder of beauty. And I suppose deep down it probably has to do with reproduction. But media or no media, culture after culture, it’s there. The old are wise. The young, attractive…


#44

Men are hard wired to be physically attracted to young women of child bearing age. Nothing wrong with that, it’s how God made us. But for a much older man to act on it often ends badly. Bocaccio, Chaucer, and others have written classic tales on the subject.


#45

I would include choice. One can choose to bring one’s attractions into congruence with what God desires, and ask God to grace them with His plan for their lives.


#46

So Diana and Camilla automatically became Princess of Wales on marrying Charlie? . Good to know in case I ever marry a Prince :slight_smile:


#47

How much younger? Romance books have a 10 yr age difference. There are quite a few that exist.
A20yr spread is a little much.
There is a mental illness contingent in strange attractions. A lttle girl is fixated on her Dad & marries an older Man. One of the Olsen twins married an ancient looking guy. If a boy is fixated on his Mom, he may be attracted to older women.
Being attracted to younger girls is concerning, getting close to the 20yr gap. There is a lack of maturity in little girls.
Avoid the OCCASSION of sin. Retrain your brain. Do you like to feel smarter than your partner(?) Then, you are insecure & need to go to school some more. If the younger body attracts you, that’s abnormal. You may have been around a culture who worships VIRGINS.
Pediaphilia is a mental & Spiritual illness.
Your attentions are an assault on a victim.
Healthy ppl, like commonality. Same faith, Hx of pleasant families, not married w no kids. Level maturity.
Psychoanalyze yourself! When did you notice that attraction? Figure it out. Pray about it. Do not linger near young girls.
Heavenly Father, we praise You & thank you for your answers to our prayers.
Please help us all to put You first & help us follow Your Commandments. IF YOU LOVE ME, YOU WILL KEEP MY COMMANDMENTS. If your eyes see temptation, look away. Quote scripture verses you memorized to overcome temptation. Refrain from movies, TV SERIES W uncomfortable topics. Help us, Keep busy w a productive life style, ABBA.
We shall TAKE UP, DAILY OUR CROSSES!
My peace, I give you.
My peace, I leave you.
Feel God’s love
In Christ’s love
Tweedlealice


#48

The REAL question is do younger women want to date some old man?

A lot of people seriously overestimate what they’re bringing to the dating table :laughing::laughing::laughing:


#49

I think the problem with this Maurice Chevalier fellow isn’t that he just prefers younger women, he thinks older women aren’t attractive, and he ties the value of women to looks.

The value of a woman, young or old, isn’t her looks.


#51

I married someone six years older than me. I was looking for someone stable and mature and confident. When I was in undergrad, I’d met a guy in my year (who was a year older than I was) and we were serious-- but he would go through periods where he would start getting panic attacks about not being able to support a family if we married post-graduation, and we’d all end up living in cardboard boxes under a bridge. I kind of wanted to bypass a few years of angst and finding-their-feet, and be with someone who knew what they wanted and was on the path in the right direction.

However, marrying someone six years older than me meant that they had already spent six years on their own as well. (Mine actually had ten years-- his parents were abroad for work for a period, so he and his brother had to keep things running at home.) So he had experience running a household, balancing his budget, paying bills responsibly, keeping things tidy, cooking for himself three times a day, and basically doing all those grown-up things that I’d never had to worry much about living with my family, or living in the dorms. I could bake— but my mom was in constant contact with her inner Julia Child, so all of my breakfast/lunch/dinner experience was more at the busboy level. :stuck_out_tongue: I’d had jobs before, but I’d been socking away all my money for tuition… it took me a bit before I stopped going crazy wasting it, because all of a sudden, I had more income than I’d ever had before.

My husband had a lot of patience.

I’d been mature compared to my peer group— but I was still very, very immature compared to someone just six years older than I was.

At the same time, it’s also been difficult in terms of children. My husband was born when my parents were in high school. There’s not a whole lot of difference between his stage of life and theirs, which I keep forgetting, because I perceive him as part of my peer group, not theirs. But there’s this wide chasm between what I’m willing to deal with in terms of children and caregiving-- because I know children are only infants for a few moments, and then all of a sudden, they’re enrolling in college-- whereas he might as well be 10 or 20 years older than I am, for as much tolerance as he has for infants. He’s a great father— but has zero desire for fatherhood. He gets annoyed when anyone accuses him of being old, but to hear him talk, you’d think he expected to go into hospice before his kids graduate college.

It’s made me a bit skeptical about people with age differences even bigger than mine, but mostly if the female half of things is still in that area of life where she doesn’t have a lot of life experience in being on her own, running her own household, keeping a job, and all that good stuff. Each person needs to bring their own strengths to the relationship— but if there’s too much immaturity/inexperience on one side of things, it makes you wonder what those strengths are.


#52

Simple really

What the more immature or inexperienced partner brings to the marriage is youth, beauty and fertility.


#53

Oh, sure. But there’s something to be said for being decorative and being functional at the same time, if you’re in it for the long haul. :slight_smile: Fast-forward 10, 20, 30, 40 years— there’s always going to be someone younger/more attractive/more whatever than you are, so you want to be sure you’ve got something of substance to bring to the table, for when the other stuff runs out. :slight_smile:


#54

Thank you for sharing. I think at a 6 year age gap, it’s usually a safe bet the man actually likes the woman as a person too. I feel like you have to be more carefull with 20ish years (but it can happen). You bring up life stage, which is so important too. A 22 year old with a 28 year old may feel a pronounced difference in life stage between them. I feel like this is less so with a 32 year old and 38 year old as both have been in the working world a while.


#55

:+1:
And anyone who’s lived a while knows that the superficial and pleasurable do in fact run out, and you are left with the beauty of the relationship, hopefully, when appearance and libido wane.
My wife is 6 1/2 years older so this issue does come up and it is possible for a relationship to continue growing in intimacy through later years, if the couple has a good foundation.


#56

I don’t see how it could possibly be a sin. One could say that about nearly any attraction. If gentlemen prefer blondes, but diamonds are a girl’s best friend, is that sinful?

Personally, as a 50-something year old gentleman, the older I get, the older become the women I’m attracted to. 30 years ago I wouldn’t look twice at a woman in her 40s. Now–I look at women in their 20s and think, “Nah. Too much work…” or even worse, “She’s my daughter’s age.”


#57

Sin? Unless adultery is involved then no.
On a more serious note, one has to consider the source of this manufactured outrage; these hollow rebels leading an empty rebellion against human nature and against God Himself. Most of these feminists have sacrificed their happiness that they could’ve had with a man years ago because of the lifestyle voice that they made. Either that or they had a baby, sometimes two, because to them it was a lifestyle choice, not the Will of God. However, in any case none of these feminists had the cohesion that have kept families together for millennia because it wasn’t the Will of God, but a lifestyle “choice,” that led them in that direction and many of their “families” fell apart as a result but, unfortunately, not their finances and power and let’s not forget that many, if not most, of them are childless. Now they’re lonely and miserable and want everyone else to be also. It’s natural for a man approaching middle age to be attracted to women that are younger. I must be a minority in this respect because I have always been attracted to older women, I am 39 and my girlfriend is 50, but for most men this is not unusual. I no longer care what feminists, or leftists in general, have to say as I see them as the enemy to everything and everyone that is good, or those that try to be good. They are destroying our civilization, along with themselves, so I have zero pity for them.


#58

It can go both ways to be honest.

A relationship can grow to something more than just physical attraction. If it does than there is hope for a lifelong marriage.

Otherwise the wife will find herself being traded in for a newer model.


#59

This is the only sin I see, thought to answer the actual question would require a better definition of “attracted.” What a person finds physically attracted is never a sin. However, if we expand the definition of “attracted” beyond the physical, then there might be a disorder in the person that is separating the meat suit from the human, deserving of all human dignity. The looks of a person should not determine the ability to have most human relationships, though I do grant that intimate relationships do require some degree of physical attraction in some people.


#60

As to the reverse problem, beyond physical attraction, I can see where women might be interested in an older man who is more stable financially and emotionally. That’s kind of a shame because growing as young adults into mature adults builds character and builds a marriage.


#61

The former might be why women are attracted to older men. They’ve grown into mature adults. Or not.

A young man has potential. An older man had either lived up to it or not. There’s less guesswork involved.

If a guy’s living in his man cave in his parents’ basement and works as a pizza delivery driver, and he’s 30 years old, I don’t want my daughters getting involved with him.


#62

An interesting question then, is which would seem a more ominous proposition: an established man at 50, or the thirty year old? I know this is a sliding scale without an answer. I was skeptical when my daughter was married while in college to a young man (her age) who left college to earn money for the two of them. It is a roll of the dice. I cannot emphasize enough though the importance of character. I loads the dice for success. This guy had it, though I did not know this until I saw the husband and father he became.


#63

There is actually pretty concrete data that men of all ages prefer women from ~18-25, while women of all ages prefer men their age or ~ 5yrs older. It’s an interesting psychological phenomenon. These are of course generalizations of preferences. I would assume this French dude is using a bit of hyperbole when he says that he is ONLY attracted to younger women, and merely means he is most attracted to them. If not he has a weird kill switch on his attraction. There is honestly no way that is true. However the media acting like it is outrageous that older men are attracted to 20 something women is pretty silly. This has only been evident since about the beginning of time.

I wish I could find the study but here is a quick article addressing it: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.independent.co.uk/life-style/love-sex/men-women-dating-age-older-younger-preference-marriage-study-attraction-a8286016.html%3Famp


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