Yes, unfortunately, but you are not alone. Also in the wrong is whoever prepared you for marriage 16 years ago who did not make sure you fully understood that your wife and the family the two of you would create were the first “neighbors” God had given you to love and support, after himself in order of priority. Now, all you can do is to work on changing your attitude that you “cannot change.” If you will to change, you can indeed do so. Pray to God for the grace that your feelings will be brought around to conform to what you now know to be right. If you need further help with this, I recommend contacting the Pastoral Solutions Institute.