Is my marriage valid


Hello, I was wondering if my marriage is valid. At the time of our wedding I was a nonpracticing catholic and my wife a nonpracticing methodist and we were married in a methodist church. after a few years of marriage we had a son and I wanted him baptized and raised as a catholic. After sometime of convincing my wife she agreed and I also talked her into becoming a catholic, so we went to R.C.I.A. classes so she could convert and I could make confirmation. I went to confession so I could start receiving communion again but we never had our marriage blessed. Is it still ok for me to keep receiving?

Thanks rfscanner


See your pastor about this but I think you’re okay.


If you were baptized Catholic before your marriage, the marriage can only be valid if recorded by the Catholic Church. Assuming neither you nor her had any previous marriage, then you can have a convalidation which is more of an administration renewal in the Pastor or Deacon’s office. If she refuses you could ask for a Radical Sanation from the diocese. You should be refraining from receiving unless celibate, until this issue is resolved.


Go talk to your priest. Based on the facts you presented, your marriage is currently not valid based on lack of form. It’s a simple matter to have it convalidated. I am not sure why none of this was discovered in your wife’s RCIA proces-- they are supposed to research marriage situations. Anyway, time to correct the issue once and for all-- see your priest.


I was in the same exact situation :blush: and no, the marriage is not valid. The convalidation was a very simple matter and we had two witnesses there plus the priest of course. I think it took about 7 minutes at the very most. Talk to your priest and get it taken care of. :slight_smile:

Read Bringing Your Marriage Into the Church.

If it were me, I would discontinue receiving communion until I had this matter taken care of.

Peace be with you!



Just to be clear, the Roman Catholic Church does not teach that you have to refrain from Communion b/c your marriage isn’t valid, but only if you are having sex with a person you are not validly married to. If you repent of this and abstain until you have your marriage regulated, you can receive the Eucharist!!!


Excellent point that I overlooked.


All great answers…

The GREAT news is you can have your marriage blessed and your vows renewed fairly quickly. Usually the first free afternoon the priest has.

Good Luck!


Call your priest and do what you have been told to do here.

God Bless you . I think it’s great you are responding to the promptings of the Holy Spirit to address this. You marriage can only gain by doing this. It will gain the prayers of the whole church whenever we pray for married couples.

I’m sorry your wife’s RCIA team missed this. Grr.


Thank You all for the Great answers and I will look into it, but the only thing that is holding me back is, I don’t think my wife truly wants to be catholic. She has not been to church for sometime now and I try to get her to go, but she refuses to go to confession. She says, she does not believe in confessing to a man only to God.

Thanks rfscanner


Hmmm… she may want to refresh her studies from RCIA on this matter. Or perhaps that wasn’t presented well in her class … unfortunately I’ve heard too many RCIA horror stories. :frowning:

Another thought, you can make your convalidation as simple or elaborate as you want. When DW & I had ours convalidated, it was like a second wedding … best man, bridesmaid, organist, 1 DD as ‘flower girl’, other dd as lector, little catered affair afterward, etc. It was beautiful.


You may also want to look at radical sanation, which does not require new consent.


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