I recently had a friend over and I was explaining to him how to play an online game and discussing some of the specific strategies used to win. Like I said though it was an online game so we were playing with other people and I had my microphone on when I was explaining the game to my friend. One of the other players was a “veteran player” so he knew what he was doing and thought I was talking to him. So he said to me, in a rude manner, that he already knew what he was doing. His rudeness made me mad and I told him that he was not the person I was talking to and then called him the less polite version of butthole. I understand that it wasn’t right to do but I’m not sure if it was a mortal sin or not. I have heard that unjust verbal abuse is wrong but I’m not exactly sure what unjust would mean though.
CCC 1857 For a sin to be mortal, three conditions must together be met: “Mortal sin is sin whose object is grave matter and which is also committed with full knowledge and deliberate consent.”
Base on this, I think that you committed a venial sin.
First, I commend you for looking into your actions.
Second, you can not “repay” rudeness with rudeness. Of what purpose is it to be rude to another’s rudeness?
Our emotions are real. You felt mad. However, what we do with our emotions is very important. Your emotion of feeling mad over a conversation about a game is not justification for being rude.
Third, no person is a “butthole” any more than a person is an ear.
Next time, simply say, “Sorry, I was talking to someone else to help them.” He may have even said, “Sorry” to you in return. Next time you are on-line with him, tell him “sorry for the name calling”.
But is name-calling grave matter?
My point was that, since it is not grave matter, it is a venial sin.
Tell that to all the kids who have been tormented so badly they feel like suicide is their only option.
“But I say to you, whoever is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment, and whoever says to his brother, ‘Raqa,’ will be answerable to the Sanhedrin, and whoever says, ‘You fool,’ will be liable to fiery Gehenna.”
But is the situation I described sound like a grave matter?
I understand my actions were by no means justified and I agree with everything you said. I’m just wondering if what I did was a grave matter.
I do not think it is grave matter to call someone a “butthole” in the situation you described. Not polite. Not grave matter. Not a mortal sin.
The issue could be different under a different situation. (A teacher calling a 3rd grader a “butthole” - would be grave matter.)
O just to be clear in my original post I said, due to my anger at his rudeness, I called him the less appropriate form of butthole. Again I know either way my action was not justified but in these type of games there is a lot of trash talk thrown around so there is a great chance he was not even fazed offended by my remark because again like I mentioned he was a “veteran player.” P.S. in regards to the trash talk, I believe this is the only time I have done it.
“Butthole” or other word that means the same… not grave matter… not polite… not mortal sin.
… and you probably already know my suggestion… drop the name calling and trash talk… you sound like a good kid.
Thank you very much
He did not say that he was bullying anyone. He got angry and called someone a name. :rolleyes: