My issue involves premarital sex. Should we save ourselves for the one person we love?
or are we harming ourselves by repressing our biological function of sex?
No, the biological function of sex can be repressed without harm. Imagine a man who for one reason or another never found a girlfriend. He would be expected by society to never have sex. It is in no way detrimental. Rather, never supressing sexual urges will lead to addiction and make resisting the urges more difficult.
Is sex more than just an act?
Yes. What answers did you expect to get on a catholic forum
is it wrong to give ourselves to other people and truly love them before meeting our spouse?
yes, If you mean have sex with them. You can truly love a person and never have sex with them; for example if someone’s fiancé died the day before their wedding, no-one would think that they didn’t love them as much as if they died the day after.
because that way we have loved more.
Really? Because I would argue that premarital sex isn’t purely about love. Is there not lust involved? I know it depends on your background, etc, but if you want what is best for a person, you would not do something that leads them to sin if you loved them.
Is it selfish to only just want to give everything to one individual?
Are you suggesting that people who have one night stands every weekend are more generous than the rest of the world?
is it selfish to be upset if your spouse has had other sex partners in the past because you wished you loved them?
This is perhaps a natural reaction for some people, but if your spouse regrets their decision and has turned over a new leaf, you should accept this and not hold it against them in any way.
or is it selfish to love others before your spouse with sex because you have ruined the purpose of marriage?
Yes it could be selfish. But rather than ruin the purpose of marriage, you have lied to the person that you are with by saying that you give yourself completely to them. Really sex is the marriage act; the vows protect the sacredness of that act. So, without intending to stay with the person til death do you part and swearing it before God to prove that commitment, you are lying to them with your body.