Short version: How do I tell my mom to give me space without being rude?
Long version: I’m 18 years old, and about two months ago I was hired at a Christian day camp that runs week-long programs for four weeks during the summer. Unfortunately, I’m not able to drive, so my mother drives me to the job every single day.
Right before the second week of camp, my boss posted a call for volunteers. My mom offered to volunteer since she was driving me anyway. She was assigned to volunteer at my station…and it all sort of went downhill from there.
Mom is smart and has lots of experience working with kids, but our work styles are completely different and she’s incredibly bossy/control freak. I like to take care of housekeeping business and set-up in the morning; she prefers to do it in the afternoon. I’m more relaxed with how I run my classroom; she’s more strict. I feel like I no longer have control over what happens in my room or what my volunteers are doing because my mom has put herself in charge. I love having volunteers who are proactive, but in order for things to run smoothly, I need a balance between proactivity and ability to just follow instructions and carry out tasks. Mom has really good ideas, but I feel like she doesn’t give me the space to try out my own ideas, and she gets mad if I don’t take her ideas.
That said, I have difficulty communicating effectively with my mom, so my own hands are not entirely clean with this issue. Additionally, the theme of the camp is “fling open the doors to everyone everyday,” and there’s a huge focus on serving those closest to you (i.e. family). This is an issue I struggle with personally all the time. The camp has been a wonderful way for me to reflect on the problem, and I know I need to do the same for my mother, but it’s SO hard to do it when the family member is constantly making you feel aggravated and miserable.
As someone who is incredibly stubborn and independent, I’m just about on my last nerve with having my mother in the classroom with me. I want my classroom back, but I don’t want to just shove my mother away (especially since she is being gracious enough to drive me every day). How should I deal with this situation? I only have a few days left of camp, but I refuse to let this issue go unresolved.
While you’re at it, please say a prayer for me, my mom, and all those involved with camp this week.