It seems that there is a constant battle in the spiritual world for my soul and boy do I notice it!


#1

Hi everyone. I know that there is a constant battle in the spiritual world for all of our souls but I really notice the battle for my soul. What I mean is that I am constantly tempted to leave the Catholic Church and these are strong temptations too. I give in so often that it isn’t even funny. I never officially leave the Catholic Church but I have thought in my mind numerous times that I would attend a different church and then did not go through with it. I also change my faith icon on another forum frequently. Is this a sin? Is it a mortal sin? Please help. :frowning:


#2

What makes you want to leave the Catholic Church? What do you feel is the problem?


#3

I just get so confused. I mean, the Bible says this and the Bible says that. Some things in the Bible clearly seem to be against what the Church teaches. And then there is this doubt that I have as to whether or not God even exists. I don’t always have this doubt, just sometimes. I also doubt whether or not Christianity is the true religion. I mean, what if I am wrong? What if some other religion is right and Catholicism is wrong? Will I end up in their version of Hell or something? It just constantly worries me and perplexes me.


#4

I understand your feelings. And I’m not just saying this. I have dealt with these same doubts and questions myself. What I would do is pray to God. You should also understand that not only the Bible supports the Church’s teachings, but history can show you as well. There are many things the Church teaches which people claim contradicts the Bible (assumption of Mary, sacrament of confession, etc.). But if you look it up, every single ancient Church (Catholics, Eastern Orthodox, Oriental Orthodox, Copts, etc.) believes in these same teachings. How could it have been that every Christian until the Reformation 1400 years after Christ had it completely wrong? As for the existence of God, look at almost every major western philosopher. Read some of their writings, and it will help you to understand the existence of God.

I deal with these same problems sometimes though. I would really pray for faith. Pray the rosary. Go to confession often. Sit and contemplate, maybe looking at your crucifix or an icon. Go to Mass more often, maybe during the week. Volunteer for some charity. Read the Bible. Listen to some sacred music. These things will hopefully help you as they’ve helped me. I’ll pray for you. God bless.


#5

Thanks. But how do I know that Catholicism out of all the world’s religions of which there are probably hundreds if not thousands is right and the others are wrong?


#6

This is something I also dealt with. I was not born into a religious family. I chose the Catholic Church after looking at many many other religions. First of all, I came to believe through reading philosophy and such, that there is one creator God. This rules out most pagan religions and Buddhism. After this, I looked at all of the main monotheistic religions, including Islam, Baha’i, Judaism, and Christianity.

In my opinion, Hinduism is too varied. Some believe in one God, others are polytheistic, others are pantheistic, etc. Baha’i is full of syncretism, and sort of acknowledges all religions as the one true religion, which makes no sense. Islam’s main founder, Mohammed, built the religion and spread it through the sheer use of force and evil, which contradicts the idea of God being truly loving. Although you could make a case that there were evil people who tried to force the Christian religion on others, it was not our very founder, for he taught only peace and love. Judaism rarely accepts converts, and it can be seen that Jesus Christ fulfilled the prophecy and is the light for the gentiles. Also look at all of the eucharistic miracles which have happened. One specifically amazing one which was verified by WHO-approved scientists was the Miracle of Lanciano:

therealpresence.org/eucharst/mir/lanciano.html

My finding the Catholic Faith did not happen overnight. It wasn’t some big flash. It wasn’t some quick miracle. But it has happened, and I am much closer to God now. If you pray the rosary, look at the fifth sorrowful mystery. It is the crucifixion of our Lord. The fruit of the mystery is “perseverance”. Continue to pray. God bless.


#7

Have you ever talked to anyone about your Borderline Personality disorder causing scrupulosity? I think it would be wise to talk to a Confessor about what you are feeling and see what he says. Many mental disorders cause it, and it’s something that can be controlled if you are under the advice of a Confessor. Do you have a spiritual director? If not, I really think you would do well to find one.

newadvent.org/cathen/13640a.htm

I have dealt with a similar situation to what you are facing, though not as severe. I think we all have doubts about the faith and get what I call “atheistic burps” (I borrowed the term from a friend). I’m sure you have heard the expression “Doubting Thomas.” That applies to many, if not all, of us occasionally. Sometimes we doubt too much and we need proof that God exists or that Catholicism is the REAL religion instituted by Jesus Himself. What I mean to say is, don’t let this sway you. It may seem easy at times to give up, but that’s what the enemy wants. He wants you to doubt everything that is faith-based and give up. That’s where a Confessor comes in. Confessing everything that is bothering you can be a real help, and it is wise to have a Confessor that is well versed in spiritual battles that can decipher what you are going through. You do NOT have to go through this alone. I will be praying for you! I hope you will seek the help of a Confessor and/or mental health professional so that you can have relief from these temptations. God bless.


#8

Yeah the Eucharistic miracles and other miracles are pretty much what keeps me having faith in the Catholic Church. That and I know that the Church has history behind it plus I do have a tiny amount of faith that isn’t based upon miracles.

Yeah, my priest knows that I am scrupulous. He has helped me with it in the past. Also, I do have a spiritual director. He really helps out a lot. :slight_smile:


#9

I’m very glad that you are undergoing spiritual direction. That brings great relief to those who are suffering scruples. You’ll remain in my prayers. :crossrc:


#10

Oh yes, and don’t forget to go to the Latin Mass! :stuck_out_tongue: :smiley:

sanctamissa.org/en/tutorial/missa-cantata/missa-cantata-incense.html


#11

I’d have thought that the fact you think there’s a battle for you soul would indicate you’ve got the truth and Satan wants to dissuade you from it. He’s not going to spend much trouble sowing doubt and confusion in a person who’s firmly wedded to error, is he?

The mere fact someone else may seem convinced of their own religion is no sign of truth. Moslems blow themselves up quite sincerely, the Japanese in World War II killed themselves quite sincerely, JIm Jones followers committed suicide en masse quite sincerely, and many have sincerely given their lives for false causes. SS troops fought to the death for the Nazi creed. They also massacred for it.

I’ve converted from a Protesant background, after being an atheist, and I am sure Christ is the truth, and that the Catholic Church is closest to the truth.


#12

catholicbible101.com/catholicbibleverses.htm

You may want to check out the link above about what the Bible says about certain topics. The Church and the Bible go together, because the Bible came forth from the Church. There can be no disagreement in fact, only misunderstanding.


#13

Obey your spiritual director, Holly. That’s all Jesus asks. :slight_smile:

Holly Hug Patrol: :hug1:


#14

Holly,

I recently discovered a blog by Jennifer F. who five years ago was a content atheist. She thought it was simply obvious that God did not exist. However, she is a convert to Christianity and chronicles her journey in well written conversion dairy.

I recommend that you you set out by reading her conversion story: Part I (Why I Believe in God) and Part II (Why I’m Catholic).

conversiondiary.com/2006/12/on-having-proof.html

Peace and God Bless,
Nicholas


#15

You aren’t alone in your battle . . . sooner or later . . . all . . . souls go through periods of doubt . . . to one degree or another . . . Many of the saints have written of their struggles with doubt . . . I love this prayer from Pope Paul VI . . . it’s just right for times such as these . . . it helps to lift up the holy prayer below to . . . our Wonderful God Incarnate . . . *** our Blessed Lord Jesus Christ . . . ** *at such times *. . . our God Who Is Love . . . always hears sincere prayer . . . *

+
:gopray2:
[size=]PRAYER FOR INCREASED FAITH
[/size]
****by Pope Paul ****VI

Lord, I believe;
I wish to believe in Thee.
Lord, let my faith be full and unreserved,
and let it penetrate my thought,
my way of judging
Divine things and human things

Lord, let my faith be joyful
and give peace and gladness to my spirit,
and dispose it for prayer with God
and conversation with men,
so that the inner bliss of its fortunate possesison
may shine forth in sacred and secular conversation.

Lord, let my faith be humble
and not presume to be based
on experience of my thought and of my feeling;
**but let it surrender to the testimony of the Holy Spirit, **
and not have any better guarantee
than in docility to Tradition
and to the authority of the Magisterium
of Holy Church.
Amen.
+
"… Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief."
Matthew 9:24
:bible1:

Keep the Faith . . . it’s an immeasurable . . . to be treasured **. . . Gift from God . . . ***and a blessing tailored just to your individual soul’s needs . . . *

*God’s sweetest blessings . . . *
[RIGHT]. . . all for Jesus+
. . . thank you Holy Mother Church+[/RIGHT]


#16

Hmmm, good point. The fact that Satan is trying to sow doubt in me is evidence to the fact that I am with the right religion. :slight_smile:

Ok, I’ll check that out!

Thanks Eucharisted! And don’t worry, I do obey my spiritual director even though I only rarely get to see him.

Ah ok. I might check that out sometime when I get the time. :slight_smile:

Thank you Jesus_123. It is helpful to know that I am not alone. :slight_smile:


#17

I have a question for you all. Am I in a state of mortal sin for switching my religion constantly and changing my faith icon on another forum?


#18

Well, I told the priest (who was a missionary from Portugal who works in Mozambique) that I wasn’t sure if I was in a state of mortal sin or not and he told me he’d hear my confession so I confessed my sins and received the Eucharist at Mass. I love to receive the Eucharist! :extrahappy:


#19

Holly:

I’m pretty sure neither is a Mortal Sin, so long as you attend Mass on Sundays and Holy Days of Obligation. I’m sure you’re well aware of the need to attend Mass on Sundays & Holy Days of Obligation and the need to receive the Holy Eucharist, “the Medicine of Immortality”…

… Beyond the above, I don’t know what you mean by “switching my religion constantly”, so I can’t comment further regarding the sinfulness. but, I can say that it’s an unhealthful and unhelpful. For one, it doesn’t allow you to have a stable identity.

It’s good that you went to Confession and received the Eucharist, but I noticed you didn’t go to your usual Confessor…

… I know your Confessor knows about your problem with Scrupulosity - I’d only ask if the question above is a result of your Scrupulosity? or If you’ve missed Sunday Masses?

I’m glad you love receiving the Eucharist - It’s another reason to stay in the Catholic church & to work out your doubts while staying in the Church…

… Now, this is important, because you’re dealing with a Borderline Personality Disorder that effects your thinking and how you deal with LIFE. People who have BPD tend to see things as either PERFECT,:extrahappy:or as TERRIBLE.:crying: People who have BPD tend to think they understand everything Perfectly, and can, therefore, accept everything, or think they understand nothing, and can, therefore, accept nothing.

Most people may experience this in their lives as problems with occasional indecision. People with BPD live with this as part of their daily lives, and this is what you’re living with and what you’re demonstrating.

FAITH doesn’t require INTELLECTUAL UNDERSTANDING. How many of us board Airplanes who don’t know anything about the physics of flight? How many of us drive cars whose systems we couldn’t explain, let alone repair? How many of us understand the Engineering Principles holding up the bridges that we drive on every day, along with the buildings we work in, worship in & shop in EVERY DAY? and, How many of us get in boats and ships haven’t the slightest idea about Navigation or Flotation?

These are all ACTS OF FAITH - the Catholic Religion doesn’t demand that we understand everything. Only that we ACCEPT it and act on that ACCEPTANCE or ASSENT, no matter how limited our understanding. God promises that, as we act on our Acceptance, or give our Assent, He will give us the Spiritual Gift of FAITH, which is something God gives in addition to our acting on our acceptance of the “doctrine of the Church”.

The Gift of FAITH is something you, like the rest of us, need to pray for. Remember, the Gift of Faith has almost nothing, if anything, to do with INTELLECTUAL UNDERSTANDING. This is something you pray for, accept and act on and then pray for, accept, and act on and then repeat as your Faith grows…

I hope this helps.

Your Brother & Servant in Christ, Michael


#20

I almost never go to my regular confessor because he is in a different town which is too far for me to drive on to on a regular basis.


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