its so hard


#1

i have tried so many many times to give up pornography and masturbation. I keep praying but how come I fall? I can go a week but then I find my way into it again!


#2

[quote=DEESYPAL]i have tried so many many times to give up pornography and masturbation. I keep praying but how come I fall? I can go a week but then I find my way into it again!
[/quote]


This is a suggestion. Maybe you do that because you like it better than being a son of the Most Holy God. You don’t know thaat God can snap your neck like it was a straw if he want to. He has given yyou so much, yet you dont listen, are you selfish? God didn’t make you so you can do those things.

One of these days, take some time and make a decision. Decidee you will be a slave to that stuff and throw God out the window. Or gather up the pornography, throw it ALL out. Get on your knees and talk tto Jesus just as if you are on the phone to a friend. Ask Him for what you want and ask forgiveness. Then go to confession, it is powerful, it gives you grace - but hey, be honest in confession.


#3

[quote=Exporter]**************************************************************************
This is a suggestion. Maybe you do that because you like it better than being a son of the Most Holy God. You don’t know thaat God can snap your neck like it was a straw if he want to. He has given yyou so much, yet you dont listen, are you selfish? God didn’t make you so you can do those things.

One of these days, take some time and make a decision. Decidee you will be a slave to that stuff and throw God out the window. Or gather up the pornography, throw it ALL out. Get on your knees and talk tto Jesus just as if you are on the phone to a friend. Ask Him for what you want and ask forgiveness. Then go to confession, it is powerful, it gives you grace - but hey, be honest in confession.
[/quote]

Though some of what you say here is well intended, at the same tine it reflects little mercy towards this poster. We all have something we are struggling with.


#4

[quote=DEESYPAL]i have tried so many many times to give up pornography and masturbation. I keep praying but how come I fall? I can go a week but then I find my way into it again!
[/quote]

Though I personally am not struggling with the former, I have struggled with the solitary sin: the M…
One thing confessors have suggested to me is: to seek to power the WILL. How do we do this? Well, by not giving in to our every want. For example, if you want two servings of food, have only one. If you really want to see a great tv program, deny yourself that, once in a while. Etc, etc. This will eventually give power to your will. Also, alway seek the virtue oppossed to the opposite vice: Chastity instead of lust, patience, instead of anger, etc. etc.:slight_smile: Many blessings, and you may also pray the Rosary daily, even if you are not in the mood o do so, etc.


#5

I sympathize with you, having had a similar problem.
I quit because it was just too embarrassing confessing it every month to my priest. I tried to be vague (mumbled “impurity so and so many times”) and he’d say loudly, "What did you do?"
So it was easier to quit. Besides, it’s a grave sin and who wants to add to the burden of sins that Jesus bore for us? Maybe if you meditate on His sacrifice (while taking your cold shower) it will help.


#6

[quote=Viki59]I sympathize with you, having had a similar problem.
I quit because it was just too embarrassing confessing it every month to my priest. I tried to be vague (mumbled “impurity so and so many times”) and he’d say loudly, "What did you do?"
So it was easier to quit. Besides, it’s a grave sin and who wants to add to the burden of sins that Jesus bore for us? Maybe if you meditate on His sacrifice (while taking your cold shower) it will help.
[/quote]

For me now that Spring and Summer are not too far off. I will suffer a lot seing some women dress provacatively. My eyes will start to wander and then the thoughts, and then…
I need prayer too.


#7

Sorry, multiple threads and I didn’t see that this one already had responses…

Start by getting some resources at dads.org/strugglewithporn.asp

It is a tough struggle, but it can be overcome. Pray a lot! Keep going to confession, even if you need to do it weekly before Mass.

“I have the strength for everything through Him who empowers me.” Phil. 4:13

God Bless,

Robert.


#8

[quote=DEESYPAL]i have tried so many many times to give up pornography and masturbation. I keep praying but how come I fall? I can go a week but then I find my way into it again!
[/quote]

If you’re male you can try the method invented by me. I don’t know if it works as I’m never addicted to porn, badly need someone else to try it out:

find a nicely drawn picture of Virgin Mary and stare at it for an hour when you have the urge.


#9

“I second that devotion”

Go to the Virgin Mary, ask her for the desire to become pure in heart and soul.

Then prepare for spiritual combat - this kind of demon is cast out only by much prayer and fasting. Recognize that hell has its sights on you. They have found a weak spot in your armor and will use it to bring you down (literally).

God is offended by sin but not defeated by it. Our defeat comes when we surrender our desire to fight - and don’t forget that God is on our side. Mary will crush the serpent’s head in your life if you reach up and grab her rosary - the weapon of choice that can break the powers of hell. Make the effort (after a good confession) to kneel each night in meditation saying her rosary and all hell will break loose - they are no match for her.

Love the sinner, hate the sin


#10

Not sure why this thread appears multiple times but as I said before

Keep working at it. Remember that the Blessed Virgin Mary revealed that more souls go to hell over sins of inpurity than for anything else.

Also remember that the Devil finds things for idle hands. Fill up your life with other things so that you have less time for these sinful activities: [list]*]REQUIRE yourself to say all 15 decades of the rosary EVERY day without excuses. That’ll fill up at least an hour right there. Plus, you’ll be gaining graces which will help you avoid this sin.

*] Re-organize your schedule so that you attend daily mass. This may require to juggle a lot of things around thus eating up more free time plus the graces received from Mass will also aid you in your spiritual battle.

*] If after following the above suggestions you still have free time on your hands to engage in these sinful activities, consider joining your local Knights of Columbus and become involved in their activities. Knights do local works of charity. Those activities should help keep you busy and recall that sripture tells us that charity toward others atones for a multitude of sins.[/list] Each of these suggestions kills two birds with one stone. First off, they eat up your time so that you have less time to devote to sinful activities and they replace it with activities which will help you grow in grace to asist you in this spiritual battle. Also, remember what will happen if you die with a mortal sin on your soul and confess it as often as it happens.

Going hand in hand with that, do face-to-face confession so that you are actually looking at the priest when confessing these sins and make it a point to go to the same priest each time. – seeing the same priest week after week and confessing the same embarassing sins will also help you in avoiding them because you will want to minimize having to see the same priest again and confess the same sin again.


#11

[quote=DEESYPAL]i have tried so many many times to give up pornography and masturbation. I keep praying but how come I fall? I can go a week but then I find my way into it again!
[/quote]

I’ve struggled greatly with masturbation. Let me put my :twocents: in before this thread is deleted.

My solution:

1.) Above all, confess every time, even if you have to go to confession every week.
2.) Do not ignore the Holy Spirit’s call, even if it be right in the middle of the act. It’s easy to try to shut that voice out, but don’t. Don’t think to yourself, “I’ve already sinned, might as well continue.” You lie to yourself when you say that. Granted, maybe you’ve already committed a sin, but when when you hear the Spirit condemning your action, you now have FULL KNOWLEDGE, so proceeding makes the sin mortal. And if it already was mortal, you’ve just doubled it by making pleasure your god above the voice of God. Know when the spirit of God is speaking to you.
3.) Avoid rationalization at all costs. If you fail, but you can’t go to confession for a few more days, don’t think, “Well, I am already in a state of mortal sin, might as well live it up and confess all.” This is a total mockery of God and will plunge you further into spiritual death. If you practice choosing evil, you will be more prone to do so, even after your confession.
4.) Remember the severity of your sin. When you sin against a woman in your thoughts, you are sinning against her intrinsic dignity, and you are also sinning against Christ Himself. So if you remember that Christ says, whatsoever you do to my little ones, you do unto me. Masturbation is a sin, sins are committed against Christ. Masturbation is a sin against Christ. Perhaps that better helps illustrate the gravity of self-indulgence of sexual urges.
5.) Remember, if you objectify women privately in your mind, you will objectify them publicly. Not masturbating makes you a better person.
6.) Speak outwardly and openly against it. When the media shoves reports down your throat that you’ll get prostate cancer if you don’t masturbate (but they hypocritically supress all the data linking birth control to health risks), say, "So what? Better to live 50 years heroically for Christ than to live 75 depraved hedonistic years."
7.) Most of all, pray for strength. God will answer you. The temptation will always exist, but you will have the strength to combat it. Offer up your unsatisfied temptations as vicarious suffering for the souls of all the women who have had their dignity removed from them by pornographers and abusers. Unite your suffering with Christ and give it cause and many will benefit.

God bless!


#12

My .02 that applies to any sin that has us in a stranglehold we cannot get out of (and we all have them)

  1. Immerse yourself in God, the Bible, and praying.
  2. Realize this is a temptation, so do everything you can to remove opportunities for the temptation to touch you. In this case, remove all material, movies, even disconnect the Internet for a week or two if you have to - after all, it’s your eternal life you are playing with here.
  3. Try to think of something you will do when the temptation does sneak in. A prayer, a saying like “Dear Jesus, come into my hear and give me the strength to overcome his temptation”, and say it OVER AND OVER again until the temptation is gone. I have also read and tried devotions that suggest to take the lead from Jesus’ example and tell the temptation to go away! “Temptation, go away, I am not going to submit to you!” These have worked for me.
  4. What has also worked for me is to think about this - Satan tempts you because he HATES you. So how would you respond to someone who hates you? “Go away Satan, and take you temptations away. You do this because you hate me, I will not be tempted”.
  5. Try to focus in your mind on the spiritual world of eternity tha Jesus promises, vs. the physical world that will be short and is evil. Maybe your mind can separate away from the physical temptation.

These are all techniques, but at some point it will sink in if you keep building your faith in Jesus, that this risks destroying your eternal life, and it sure isn’t that.

Above all, if your faith continues to grow, you will win - Jesus is on your side!


#13

First of all gid rid of all pornography in your house. That is the first step. Pray, pray , pray, and then pray some more. If you use your computer to view porn. Write a post it note on your computer screen with NO on it. This will remind you not to view porn. Set your homepage to Catholic Online or another Catholic site so when you go online this is the first page you see and it may discourage you to go to a porn site. I have this same problem and this is the advice i can give you. Also, you say you can go g week without it, well next time try two or three weeks and so on.


#14

you get there… keep it up…

the praying…

oh man, i’m so gonna get banned for that one…:smiley:


#15

Wow, look at all that advice. Take heart, I think it all comes from all our struggles too.

All the advice is great, get rid of it, pray, go to Mass, ask help from your Blessed Mother, deny yourself, get out and help others. I guess the only thing I can add is work on relationships with others. Once you start learning to expand your love for others and decrease the desire to make them an object to use, you’ll increase your joy more than you thought you ever could.

If you find you cannot fight this all on your own, well that can help show you cannot fight every problem on your own. You must rely on the grace of God. Keep praying and confessing, it’s nothing the priest hasn’t heard before. Besides it’s the extra grace you want. Eventually you’ll start looking back, and even though you sill seem like the problem is just as bad, you’ll see great progress in the stuggle.

I cannot remember who said it, I think it might have been a desert father. The person that does not struggle with lust like this and looks down on a person that does, would drop to their knees and beg for forgiviness if they realized what this stuggle put a person though. Take care & God Bless. Let’s all pray for each other.


#16

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