My prayer is that if God’s will includes a natural child to you and your wife, that you have it.
I know where you’re coming from…by the time my husband figured out that marriage was the life for him, I was almost too old to have a kid. Our only pregnancy as a couple ended in miscarriage. I am having a hysterectomy tomorrow that will end any chance of fertility for me, but we were trying to prolong this inevitability for years.
All I can do now is just accept God’s will. I am very active in my parish and have a great job that includes lots of travel (including a trip to China soon!), so I can’t help but notice that whatever God’s plans are for me, they seem to include making it easier for me to do non-mom things. Only He knows!
A priest told my husband and I that there are other ways for our marriage to bear fruit, and they include service. I found lots of consolation in that.
Please remember also that there are so many children out there that need a home. They have no one to love, and this would be an incredible form of charity, should you two decide to adopt. Think about it!
My prayers of peace and hope for you and your wife.
Have you discussed your situation with the doctors at the Pope Paul VI Institute? www.popepaulvi.com
These doctors treat couples with morally acceptable means. They do not use any treatments that conflict with the moral law.
IVF is so horrible for so many reasons. You create human beings that you then destroy. What would you say to these aborted children should you meet them at judgment day? Yes, I killed all of you because I selfishly wanted a child.
The IVF failure rate is high causing financial and emotional stress on the couple. Pursuing a child by any means is not in keeping with God’s will for marriage and sexuality. It’s a mad quest, an obsession, and yes it is sinful. And, because it is sinful it comes with many unpleasant consequences. Please do not pursue this path.
You are not alone in your infertility. Remember, God is the Creator of all, the author of life. We are not.