My fiancee and I have been living together for 6yrs. We have known each other for two before that. (Don’t want advise on seperating or that those who live together before marriage divorce, i find that to be a bunch of bull. I doubt the divorce rate is so high because only those that live together before marriage are divorcing)
We have gone through the RCIA program and are now fully initiated into the church as of the Easter Vigil. We postpone any wedding plans till we became Catholic. My confusion is that we have talk and we can’t make up our mind on which is the best course for us.
- Do we meet with the priest and wait 6 long months till get married? We have to go to pre cana and all that, i find it to be a waste, we been together so long, communicate great, have gone through more than any married couple i know and are still madly in love.
(So why haven’t we gotten married yet, well life, so many deaths, layoffs, accidents, money issue, we put it aside, we were also young when we got together, we are reaching 30 and would like to start a family soon, anyways now we are glad because it wouldn’t have been valid by the church anyway)
Will they ask us to remain chaste or live apart? Don’t think we could do either. What if we try and fail then we can’t take part in the Eucharist?
(Since i was a candidate, he was baptized, and since my first confession we have remain chaste, specially to receive our first communion but it is so hard)
We could get a civil union at the courthouse but then what will the church think? The priest, deacon and RCIA director know us and love us, maybe they will bless our marriage with out to much of a headache.
But what if they bless our marriage, convalidate, can i still have a big nuptial mass wedding?
Because of health reasons i got off the BCP, also because i told myself that i want to follow the church teaching, we are not using any form of birth control, and remain chaste, but we are not perfect, what if i get pregnant, what does the church do then?
I know you’re advise will be to talk to the priest, but how do we start, if i say we want to get married, and they say ok remain chaste or live apart for 6 mos, will they get mad if i said nevermind can we get a civil union and you just bless our marriage lol
Joking aside, for us the Catholic faith is our inner being, we are so thankful for God, our community and our faith has grown so much. We truly want to do what is right, but don’t want to lose ourselves in the process.
Please help me,