My first started post. I have quite a complicated story, I have shared some of it in a couple previous posts, and I won’t go into the details too much.
I have been LDS for 12 years, and in the last two years I started the journey to the Catholic church. All the explanations for that belong in another post.
Currently, for the past month, I have been in the RCIA program. It is wonderful. I am spending time in the Adoration Chapel when I can, listening to Catholic Radio, and praying more than I can ever remember praying in my life.
Here is the complication. My husband, whom has grown up LDS, has not been particularly supportive of my decision. When it first came up a few years ago, that I was interested in exploring the Catholic church, he blamed many of my friends at that time, including a good Catholic (male) friend of mine. I let my faith take a spot on the backburner, as I began to realize our problems were MUCH deeper than religion.
I have only brought it up a few times in the past year…it’s difficult for me to talk about it with him, as it is many things. We have trust issues, etc. Again, lots of detail I am leaving out here. Bottom line, we have our own problems, but they are things I WANT to work on with him, but it’s very difficult to talk with him, as he doesn’t always understand what I am trying to explain and/or doesn’t listen. Of course, that is just my side of the story. He of course will have his own.
SO, where I am trying to get is the last month, my return to exploring my faith, I have not shared with ANYBODY, excepting of course the forum here,and the people as part of the RCIA program. I also have not YET shared with my husband. My desire is to be able to talk to him before I go to anybody else…I guess I am a chicken. I am terrified of talking to him, because I am afraid of his reaction. Right now I am enjoying the Holy Spirit, and the strength I have in other aspects of my life, from my current experiences. I am terrified when I go to him, again, about this topic, that the doubts will come back into my life, or that I will be SO afraid of conflict between us, that I will do whatever it takes to appease him, which in the past has meant giving up exploring my faith, cutting friends out of my life he thought were harmful to our marriage (even if I disagreed) etc.
My apologies, I am not certain how well I am explaining everything so far. If you have questions, just ask, I will try to be clear.
I will get to my questions. I had some thoughts today and I wanted to clarify them.
First off, after I am baptized into the Church, I was realizing that my marriage with my husband would not be considered valid within the catholic church. Does this mean I would immediately not be able to take communion? I think I have heard so many different things now that I am a bit confused. I need some clarification.
Is there a time period? I am afraid even if my husband DOES accept my change of Faith, that he will fight getting an official Catholic marriage. Is my question clear? I’m sorry.
On the other side of the coin, my question also is concerned about if my husband does NOT decide to stay with me when I tell him I have definitely made the decision to be baptized. I should state, previous times we have discussed this, he has indicated that if I do decide to become Catholic, we would be going on different paths and would therefore lead us to be pulling apart from each other, therefore we would be done. Perhaps he just needs a little more education in the Catholic church to understand many of the morals of the LDS church and the Catholic church are shared (not Doctrine, I am talking about the belief in the importance of marriage, etc). I am trying to understand what would happen with that divorce, if that is what it were to lead to? Would I still be required to receive annulment? What would be the general requirements? I thought I understood the process for someone in my situation, but suddenly I heard something, and I am now confused. Can someone just explain what the process would be?
I am not trying to jump to any conclusions yet, I guess I am just trying to be prepared, alleviate some of my fears. My apologies for the length of this post. I have really enjoyed this website, reading on so many topics.