Let's get some new stats on birth control usage


#1

Lots of Catholics use artificial birth control. How do CAF members compare to the general public?


#2

Never. However we have used NFP to space children owing to our material insecurities which constitute a grave necessity. NFP is as successful as contraception in achieving this end so nobody has any excuses!


#3

[quote="John_of_Woking, post:2, topic:244733"]
Never. However we have used NFP to space children owing to our material insecurities which constitute a grave necessity. NFP is as successful as contraception in achieving this end so nobody has any excuses!

[/quote]

Don't forget to vote!


#4

My option isn;t up there but mine would be was on the pill now currently abstaining. As for affects, well the pill messed with my drive and stuff which wasn;t good for our marriage bed if you know what I mean. Abstaining is worse though lol!


#5

I have been divorced for 30yrs.and never remarried.I lead a celebate life.


#6

is this a public poll we have a rule here about asking for personal info


#7

One more thing I want to add to the OP:

Optional, if you feel like responding and not just taking the poll:

For those of you who used birth control in the past, or who got sterilized and now regret it, were you practicing Catholics at that time and knowingly breaking the rules, or did you convert some time later and that's when you stopped using it?

Also optional - if artificial birth control was/is causing problems in your marriage, what sort of problems would that be? They say using birth control interferes with the unitive aspect of marriage, and that a couple are lying to each other when they contracept. Was/is that true for you?

Personal experiences only please! I am well aware of the theology as I'm sure most of you are. This is the Catholic Living sub-forum, not Apologetics. Keep that in mind.
:)


#8

The poll is anonymous. Not public. Want to get some honest answers so even y’all’s CAF friends won’t know your answer! (If you don’t give a response I mean)


#9

I should’ve thought of some more options, yours, and also like people who feel neutral about the use of birth control in their marriage, people who want to use it but they don’t bc their spouse doesn’t want them to, and there’s probably some more things I could come up with!
Like with abstinence - I don’t think I want to just put abstinence as an option, but maybe something like, “we are abstinent but wish we could use birth control or were sterile” or "we used to use it but stopped using it for reasons other than that is was bad for our marriage."
If they let me edit it, what other options should I put?


#10

This is an interesting poll but I think there are so many other options that could be included it might become complicated...take me for instance...I'm not Catholic YET, but I have needed to take the birth control pill in the past for purely medical reasons (I'm single and celibate).
Now I am becoming Catholic I will obviously not be so relaxed about my choices should I find the right partner in the future. But I have to say at my age (37) and already being a mother of 3, I wouldn't trust NFP as far as I could throw it...I could not cope with another child, and nearing the menopausal age I would be terrified to rely on NFP.


#11

I was a non-practicing Catholic. After I was married for eight years (without children) my mother brought up the topic of bc, spilling the seed and how it was wrong. I was like "yea right" and thought she was crazy. My Catholic religion teachers never once taught about morals.

I had a tubal ligation after I had two children. I really did want more children but I went through with it because my dh said it was too expensive to have more than two and he did not want more. I absolutely regret this decision. I now give people Dr. Janet Smith's cd on "Contraception Why Not?"


#12

My children have been naturally spaced by means of nursing. My fertility came back 9 month post partum with my first child and my second child has recently turned 1…my fertility has not yet returned. I see this as a sign from God that we aren’t ready to have another child yet.

I can’t help but feel thankful as we are currently living at our in law’s house. It would prove difficult if we had another child. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t be happy if we found out we were expecting.

I love knowing I am putting all my faith in God and let Him do the planning. He knows what’s best for us.


#13

To onmyknees: Contraception, Why Not? has certainly opened my eyes!!! I wish i could share it with everyone I know! (I have my own copy, too!) :slight_smile: I grew up Catholic but never was taught nor understood the Church’s stance on contraception. After listening to Janet Smith it makes SO much sense.


#14

We used the pill early in our marriage because of my hormonal problems, but we were Protestant anyway and didn't realize there was anything wrong with artificial birth control anyway. But God's law is in our consciences, and it was the Church's teaching on contraception that first drew my attention to it. I knew the Church was right.


#15

I voted we have used, but it was bad for our marriage.

We used condoms occasionally prior to finding the Church, up until that point we had what I felt was a good marriage, however once we became aware of the stance of the Church we switched to NFP and both our sex life and relationship blossomed in ways we had never imagined.

So, although I never realized it was bad for our marriage once we made the switch and embraced openess to life we realized what we were missing.


#16

We used early in our marriage, and I can't say it was a bad experience at all. But we haven't used in a very long time and probably wouldn't in the future.


#17

We don’t use it, but NFP is hard for me and has really put a strain on our relationship. We are considering leaving The Church over this issue. I’m not sure I could go to Mass if I used it, but I’m not sure my marriage will survive if I don’t. But as of today, we’re not committing that particular sin : 1


#18

Our option isnt up there.
We used birth control early in our marriage. We never would now because we are commited Catholics. We want to be holy and know that it is wrong. We didnt stop because it was bad for our marriage but because it was bad for our souls. In fact it might affect our marriage in the opposite way but it is worth it.


#19

I said we quit using it because it was bad for our marriage, but the real answer is a little more complicated. Even during 12 years of Catholic schooling, I was never taught that it was wrong. I'd always heard the Church was opposed, but never was given any real reasons. I certainly didn't know it was an official teaching, especially after having several priests tell me it was okay. My wife never went to Catholic school, but her Catholic parents not only didn't tell her that it was wrong, but actively encouraged her using it and put her on the pill early in her teens.

Based on our backgrounds, in our minds it was pretty natural for her to go on the pill once we got married (despite what everyone believed, we weren't sexually active before we were married so there was no need for her to be on it then). She was on the pill for several years, right up until we decided to have our daughter. She went back on it right after she was born, then went off it again a few months later when we decided to try again. She then went back on it for a time, but then begged me to go off it due to health issues. It took a little convincing, but I finally supported her decision. We chose to use other methods after that, but finally decided that the idea of another baby wasn't so bad so we decided to forgo those in favor of a very loose and sloppy adherence to the rhythm method (that way we could still tell the people in our family who were opposed to idea of non contracepting that we weren't trying to get pregnant, even though we were trying very hard to do an awful job of not trying).

The idea of ABC being bad for our marriage came about as a bit of a revelation during this time. Our lackadaisical efforts to avoid contraception resulted in us getting pregnant, which unfortunately led to our miscarriage. However, this did bring me back into the Church more fully than I'd been since I was a teenager. I started reading up on all those things I'd been so misinformed about, one of which was the Church's views on contraception. We hadn't been using any form of contraception for about a year at this point, and although I could tell we now had a much different view of sex & one another than we'd had before, all the pieces didn't fall into place until I really began studying what the Church teaches and why. I didn't discuss it too much with my wife at first, but when I finally did, it turned out that she'd come to a lot of the same conclusions about how much better our marriage was without the benefit of having read about the Church's views.

As it is now, we haven't used any form of contraception in about 3 years and while we couldn't see the negatives before, we can certainly feel the benefits now. We're much closer, have a deeper respect for one another and a much healthier appreciation of our marriage. I know there are other mitigating factors, but the openness and deeper intimacy we have from not using birth control certainly plays a big part.


#20

Didn't vote in the poll, as none of the options apply to us.

We did use it during our marriage - first, for about the first 5-6 months of our marriage, until we decided to just go w/ the "whenever we get pregnant, we get pregnant" attitude. No trying, charting, no preventing - just living life. Very next month, a BFP.

After we had our son, we used b.c. (never pills or anything hormonal - I refuse to take them for a multitude of reasons - we were always strictly barrier protection) for about 2 years, but not consistently. Every now and then, we'd throw caution to the wind. But around the time ds was 2, 2 1/2, we said forget it.

He's now 9, and still our only. Only God knows why, and while I'd love to blessed with more, we aren't.

Anyway, I can say that when we were using b.c., it truly didn't affect our marriage. We simply reached a point where we both agreed that we just didn't care for it, we wanted more children, so why use it?


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