Let's tell some happy marriage stories


#1

Can you tell me a little about your happy marriage, the things that make it happy for you, the things you do for your spouse to bring a smile to his/her face, your philosophy on it all, and why you feel like things are working out well for you? What advice would you give to engaged couples?

There are so many sad stories on here, I just think it’d be nice to not only help out those who are looking to get married but also inspire those in less than perfect marriages to do things to make their situation better.

Thanks!


#2

I don’t know if this is what you are looking for, but today I am being baptised, confirmed and getting my first holy communion at the Easter Vigil Mass. My husband snuck out this morning by himself. He came back bearing flowers, a card and a BEAUTIFUL gold crucifix necklace for me. It was so nice that he was thinking of me on this very special day in my life! :slight_smile:


#3

I have both kinds of stories, as I’m sure most marriages do. So for this thread I’ll limit myself to the good stuff;)

The number one thing that makes our marriage work is commitment to God. I did not have this at all when we were first married and hubby was just returning to the Church and God. Once we got on the same page spiritually things drastically improved. It is so wonderful to be able to know that your spouse agrees with you on all matters of faith and morals. And we continue to learn, together.


**Now for a bit of husband ego-boosting:D **


My husband is a wonderful and dedicated father. I always knew he’d be a good dad, but he has gone so above and beyond that I’m still pleasantly surprised! And to hear my family comment on how great he is with Lily makes me feel so proud of him. He adores his baby girl and she adores him. It warms my heart.


My husband has always (despite our personality clashes) put me above other things (like hobbies and friends). We got married when we were 23 so most of our friends/coworkers were single and still into partying, a lot.


** He got invited out with the boys all the time but made it clear that we were a packge deal. He actually wanted to be with me. It felt great and all of his friends thought it was cool. Especially considering that many of the guys he works with can’t wait for any excuse to get away from their wives:( Before anyone jumps on this, I want to be clear that he did/does do things without me, just that most of the time he prefers not to.**


There are tons more things that make my marriage good (but I’ll save them for later). We are not happy all the time, but who really is? What makes our marriage good is knowing that we will work out our problems…no matter how long it takes. We know that divorce is not an easy solution and neither of us feels it is an option during difficult times. We are both commited to making it work, that’s what makes it great.


malia


#4

DH & I will be married 10 yrs. this October. :smiley: What makes our marriage great is that we work on our problems together and keep Christ in the center of our union.

DH is my rock when times are tough and an awesome spiritual example. He never puts his needs first and will always go the extra mile to help anyone in need even if it’s not family.

He is very patient and understanding even when I am not feeling well and goes out of his way to make sure that I have my meds & am comfortable.

Since my stroke, He won’t let me drive anywhere alone and insists on taking me to my medical appointments.He is very protective & if I want to visit my friends or go shopping, he will take me to where I want to go w/o complaining. Now that is one heck of a husband if you ask me.:thumbsup:


#5

I love these stories!

Where are the rest? Keep them coming, folks! :smiley:


#6

My husband has been very loving and supporting of my family. When my aunt was diagnosed with cancer my husband took turns staying in the hospital with her after her surgery.

Later, after she was bedridden at home he stayed with her a few times a week so I could take my Mom out and give her a break.

Now that my aunt has died, my mother will be moving with us and my husband has gone out of his way to make my Mom feel welcome.:slight_smile:


#7

Happy Easter…we welcome you to read marriage stories here

catholicsingles.com/new/testimonial-1.html


#8

When I was sick in bed for two days last week, my dh took the two days off. He took care of the six kids and put me to bed. And, he ran out and bought me season five of Monk–my new favorite tv series to watch–blowing our budget for the week. :slight_smile:

Isn’t he wonderful?


#9

I had a nervous breakdown (job-related - I was a teacher :o ) three years ago. DH took two years off to nurse me back to health. Now I feel great, no more depression, and give him a lot of credit for being there for me. Without him, I wouldn’t be teaching again today!
Also, for the 21 years we’ve been married, he has been the best husband and father I could’ve ever imagined (even if he IS too easy on the children :rolleyes: ).
Hooray for good Catholic husbands!


#10

My wife and I have been married since 1970–36+ years.:smiley:

Our courtship was very short–we were married 3 months after our first date, I was surprised that my wife was available when I met her. Doesn’t say much for the intelligence of St. Louis and Cincinnati men, or maybe it says a lot for God’s plan for us.

My wife was a member of the Lutheran Church-Missouri Synod and her family was very staunch. She attended Lutheran grade and high schools two uncles were pastors, another uncle was principal of a Lutheran school, and her sister and brother-in-law were Lutheran school teachers. First time I went to the Lutheran church with her, her young cousins couldn’t understant why I didn’t take communion!

My wife entered the Church in 1975 and was confirmed at the “new” Cathedral in St. Louis with my mother, who was also a convert, as her sponsor.

My wife and I both entered marriage with the conviction that “till death do you part” meant exactly what it said, even though we both were CINO and LINO at the beginning (we were married in her church without receiveng permission from the archbishop).

We have had our share of lows and highs during our marriage and sometimes were extremely angry and disappointed with each other, but we always believed that life without each other was more unbearable than any hurts we then facing.

People have asked us how we made it. The answer is simple–only with God’s help. I firmly believe God intended us to be together and is helping us fulfill His plan, whatever it may be.


#11

I think I am still considered a newly wed–our one year anniversary is May 27th :smiley:

I love my husband and I love being married! God blessed us very quickly with a child, and back when I was about 4 months along I started having trouble getting comfortable to sleep at night, and he went out and brought me home a special pregnancy pillow as an early Christmas present to help me sleep better. He is always thinking of me first and I always feel so protected and cared for. He works so hard and never complains so that I have been able to be a stay-at-home mom even while awaiting the birth of this child. I offered a ton of times to get a part-time job until the baby comes, but he keeps saying he wants me to be able to stay home and rest, and exercise each day, and get things ready for the baby, and eat right, and take care of myself. Most of the time it still feels like we are having “sleep overs”…like it’s too good to be true that we ACTUALLY get to be in the same bed together. We’ll stay up and pillow-talk for hours sometimes about anything and everything, just because we can.

Prayer is the most important thing…it allows us to share everything. Trying to keep Christ at the center of everything is crucial, esp. for the first 6-7 months as DH was still job hunting and we were constantly trying to remain calm, knowing that God would provide. Marriage has made me so much less self-ish, I actually enjoy cleaning our apartment, so that he has a peaceful house to come home to. I never thought such joy could come from serving someone else! And of course, I will be eternally grateful to DH because I have this small life growing inside me, as a “constant reminder that he and I have worked lovingly side by side with God” as one of my 'thanksgiving for motherhood" prayers says. :slight_smile:


#12

Couldn’t edit this, but just wanted to add:

We’ve put on a few pounds, hair is thinner and/or greyer, and we don’t have the energy we used too, but whenever I look at my wife, I still see the beautiful 22-year-old of our wedding day.


#13

My husband and I have been married 21 yrs. I think for the most part, you have to have an open communication with each other.
Don’t ever go to sleep at night without saying “i’m sorry” or something along those words. Never go to sleep mad at each other. Let’s see…even though we have been married for 21 yrs, we still hold hands here at home or even while driving, going somewhere. We know we love each other but we also make sure to tell each other “I love you” :slight_smile: We are not afraid of showing affection towards each other in front of our boys. He hugs me or plants a kiss on my cheek, in front of them.
I’ll keep thinking on this subject and may post more. :slight_smile:


#14

When my husband and I were dating I told him there were certain requirements that I would have if I ever remarried, but I didn’t tell him what they were. I told him if he were the right man he would figure them out, but that I wouldn’t tell him so he could change himself to fit me. Here is my mental list:

  1. I will only marry a Catholic man because my faith is such a big part of me, if I couldn’t share it, I couldn’t share all of myself.
  2. He has to be willing to live a Catholic life, meaning no pre-marital sex, goes to mass, goes to reconciliation, is the spiritual leader of the family etc…
  3. We have to agree to raise all the children the same, not my kids one way and his kid another.
  4. Any man I marry must be willing to have an active prayer life with me, together and separate.

My dh was not Catholic when we met. Soon after we started dating, he bought books like Catholicism for Dummies, and St Thomas Aquinas prayerbooks, etc. Within a year from then he joined RCIA and after he was received into the Church. Six months later he joined Knights of Columbus and a couple months later completed his annulment from his first marriage. He also supported my decision to ground his daughter for lying to my face and stepped up and helped my kids with homework etc.
He also accepted that I would not engage in pre-marital sex, he attended mass with me and the kids way before he became Catholic. So, the only thing left was to pray together on a regular basis. At Advent that year I made an advent wreath and the kids and I prayed every night before dinner from the suggested readings and prayers our parish sent over. DH showed up every night and asked if he could join in with us. So after my annulment paperwork was in but not completed, (Yes I know it was wrong… but I had a defect of form so I knew it would go through rather quickly) DH proposed… He conspired with my oldest son to arrange for our friends to be out at a club and he took me out there to propose in front of all my friends. Before he got a chance to propose, my sister called, she was in on the plan too. SO my ds stole my phone and told her not yet call back in 5 minutes.

I have never regretted saying yes to him. He is the most wonderful husband. I never doubt he loves me, He definitely takes care of me… I recently broke my leg. He waits on me hand and foot, does my laundry, does everything!!! Now joy of joys… I am expecting and he was so excited it took me by surprise.


#15

This is great in theory, but can get a little difficult in proactice. Ever try staying awake for a week?:whistle:


#16

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:


#17

My husband and I had our first date on November 7, 1981. We got engaged three months later and have been happily married for 24 years.

We both knew early on that we had something special. We had the same values and goals in life. He knew that I might not be able to have children, and he was fine with that. Fortunately, we were blessed with a wonderful son.

We have both grown in our love of God and our love for each other. We have always had total and complete trust in each other. I suffered from an eating disorder for 12 years, and my husband stood by me through every step of my recovery.

He has been and wonderful husband, friend and father. My whole family loves him as much as I do. He is truly a treasure and I feel so blessed to share my life with him.


#18

Well…I don’t know what to say. :blush: :hmmm:
But no, i’ve never tried to stay awake for a week. :coffeeread:


#19

I just posted this on the “submission” thread, and it occurred to me that it sums up why our marriage has been something for which we could be thankful for nearly 18 years. We didn’t set out pursuing “happiness”. We set out to love each other and to use our talents serve others, in addition to supporting ourselves. There is a big difference.

My husband has a demanding job, but I look at it as a career in service to others and I look at it as our career choice. When he has to work weird hours, it is the sacrifice we make, so that we can contribute to the practice of medicine. When I was teaching and he had to pick up the slack, that was a contribution that we made to education. What we do, we do together, as one.

This is what I posted on the “submission” thread:

As Steven Covey says, the main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing. I have my own saying: If the person you are considering marrying is not someone for whom you would gladly live in a house painted a color you hate, then keep looking. Either he is not your man, or you aren’t grown up enough yet to marry. It is only paint.

I value my husband’s opinion very highly, and he values mine. When we got married, I knew that there would be times when I was sure I was right and he was wrong and we’d be doing things his way, anyway–and those “sometimes” happen for me, too. Nevertheless, we live in the ideal circumstance where he makes sure that all our decisions are made jointly, preferring no one’s opinion, and where I let him keep on thinking that. (I’m sure he’d say exactly the same thing. :wink: )

The Gospel reading we had for our wedding was this:
They returned to Capernaum and Jesus, once inside the house, began to ask them, “What were you discussing on the way home?” At this, they fell silent, for on the way they had been arguing about who was the most important. So he sat down and called the Twelve around him and said, “If anyone wishes to rank first, he must remain the last one of all and the servant of all.” Then he took a little child and stood him in their midst, and putting his arms around him said to them, “Whoever welcomes a child such as this for my sake welcomes me. And whoever welcomes me welcomes, not me, but him who sent me.”

This is the exact message that Jesus reiterated at the Last Supper, as we heard on Holy Thursday (John 13:1-17)

If this is the command that Jesus gave to the first princes of the Church, how much also does it not apply to husbands and wives…for are not the bishops and cardinals in the same relationship to the Holy Father as we are to our husbands, the Pope being the first among equals and the Servant of the Servants of God?

When we make a decision, once we give our mutual consent, it is our decision. There is no “I told you so” when things go wrong. There is no “you got your turn last time, it is my turn to do it my way” because we each try to give each other their way whenever we have the moral strength to do it. When we don’t, when one of us is very attached to their own way, then the other gives way, in deference to the weakness of the other…and usually, the “winner” expresses some rather sheepish gratitude for that.

My husband is not Catholic, but he truly loves me and gives himself up for me. In our home, I see my husband as the leader, having David’s role, and myself as the prophet, having Nathan’s role. I am not ultimately the leader, but it is not my role to simply do as I am told. I have a responsibility to advocate for the way of God, which is for faith, hope, love, and generosity of heart.

I have another saying: no matter who you marry, there are going to be days when you look across the breakfast table and think, “This guy is nuts.” It is a choice to decide that he is a nut with whom you are willing to go over a falls, as long as he is in the same barrel. If you have that, you’ll do OK.

My sister-in-law, when turning down sweets that don’t fit in with her health decisions, says, “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.” You could turn that to this situation: “Getting your own way will never feel as good as loving does.” Any voice in your head that tells you anything else is lying.


#20

Going on 12 years being happily Married with 3 young children now and still very much in love with my wife.

We are into our 3rd year of being a family growing in Faith, which I must say has brought us all even closer.

:thumbsup:


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