GratefulFred said : "I was trying to ask, does the Commandment to love require me, or allow me, to ASSIST them in doing something that is clearly contrary to our Faith, and not just something I do not like."
OK, Good Question.
There is a thing called a Conspiracy.
This is when 2 or more people agree to do something, and (usually) Conspiracy is about doing something Illegal (or Immoral).
Let’s say that Daughter WANTS to have an Abortion (Bummer).
At this point, you can offer her your Love, and Compassion, and NOT Stop her in a Real Way.
So, if this is what you do, then I see NO Ethical Violation.
However, IF your Daughter asks you to drive her to the Clinic, and you drive her there … then this is the Point at which you MIGHT BE violating your Catholic Faith.
So, you have an active Conspiracy going on to Commit the Sin of Abortion.
I have NO idea how God would treat this, but it seems to me that I would be Sinning if I drove her to the Clinic.
And, EVEN IF God approved of this, I have my OWN Perspective (which would make it a Sin to me, anyway).
GratefulFred then said** : “In most friendships, we tolerate certain behaviors we may not like.
We try to be mutually supportive as a way to show our love.
I think sometimes, the other one sets his or her mind to proceed on a path that clearly violates our Faith. At that point, we may be conflicted.”**
YES, that situation has come up for me many times over the Years.
When I relate to my Atheist friends, I hear a lot of STUFF that is against my way of living Life.
So, I put myself aside, and relate to them as a Favorite Uncle (or some such person).
I listen … I allow them to feel what they want to feel … I LOVE them.
This is easy-Enough to do. Smile, and know that I am being a Good Friend.
These people don’t try to INCLUDE me in living their Lifestyle, so I am not put in the position of second-Guessing my Motives (or actions) for anyone asking me to Conspire to do something Bad.
Fred said a cotton-picking mouthful : "If it comes to it, do we sacrifice a long-standing friendship?
or, should we help them anyway in doing something their way, because maintaining that friendship, [we are] keeping the line of communication open, in hope of eventually reaching them, is a more important aspect of love ?"
This is the $64,000 Question.
What has occurred in my Life is mostly ALLOWING people to do what they want (unless it is something REAL Gross).
Most people are Generally Good.
But, we ALL have “twisted” pieces of insight … so if I believe that the person is OK-enough generally, I will keep that Relationship alive.
Of course, this is NOT just my Decision, it is also a part that my Spouse has her OWN Decision to make.
And, I have broken-off relationships several times, because my Equal Partner has wanted me to do so.
This is JUST how things should work … a Couple decides together what Social Contacts are made (and Kept).
In my experience, I have NEVER disagreed with her Decision (or, even debated it with her) … after all, THAT Relationship is the most important one for me to HAVE and to KEEP.
Fred ends with a Deadly question (deadly to a relationship, that is)** : “How do we make known our unwillingness to help, and still maintain a long standing friendship?”**
This happens (or DOESN’T happen) on a case-by-case basis.
But, I have found that things work out OK … IF I sit down, with Love and Compassion in my Heart, and KINDLY tell say to him,** "My Relationship with you is important to me, but I don’t feel Good about jumping in this time to help you. Maybe next time (and the 10 times after that) I will be Happy to help out."