Lingerie


#1

Why is it that some people make it out to be such a big deal if a wife wears lingerie for her husband? I remember a post from several months ago about this issue and I could not find it, but I was wondering what others thought about this. Do people consider this offensive? (All this is in the context of a married relationship, in the privacy of each other.)

Personally, I see nothing wrong with my wife wearing lingerie, but I would not force her to do so.


#2

I think it has to do with pubescent boys and porn. If a man makes a big deal about it, I assume he spent too much time with the Victoria’s secret catalogue in Junior High, and now has some manufactured image in his head of what “sexy” looks like.


#3

Good Topic. I, for one Love, beautiful lingerie, but tasteful too.

My H, being that he is subject to problems of this nature, (see my past posts) has at times given me very racy, yuccy, slutty lingerie, which I really did take offense to. I threw them all away, and told him why too.

I think there really is a fine line to know and distinguish what is appropriate and what is not. Just because we are married and a Christian, IMO, is not cause to subject ourselves to trash and just mold to the world and all it’s garbage, making “sex” first and foremost in our minds. To be tasteful, elegant, and truly a woman, comes first,and IMO, needs to be learned, and cultivated, not to be a mindless trashy “sex goddess”, whether married or not. Now, my H knows better. He gave me a beautiful and tasteful nightgown this past Christmas.

God Bless You Original Poster (OP).


#4

I think there’s absolutely nothing wrong with lingere. I don’t wear it every evening but I certainly don’t mind dressing up a little sexy for my hubby every once in a while. Whatever hubby picks out is fine with me, he’s the one who enjoys looking at it.

Life is short people, enjoy each other while you can.


#5

[quote=Mirror Mirror]Why is it that some people make it out to be such a big deal if a wife wears lingerie for her husband?
[/quote]

What people?

[quote=]Do people consider this offensive? (All this is in the context of a married relationship, in the privacy of each other.)
[/quote]

If both partners agree, nobody else gets a vote.


#6

If it is between a husband and a wife and for them only what could be the problem? Really, in my marriage it is not my concern if someone thinks it is or isn’t ok for me to wear lingerie, that is between hubby and me :thumbsup:


#7

[quote=Island Oak]If both partners agree, nobody else gets a vote.
[/quote]

Bingo.


#8

[quote=Island Oak]What people?

If both partners agree, nobody else gets a vote.
[/quote]

I do not have names, it was from a post that I read a while back.

I agree, I was just asking why people have a difference of opinion, just curious.


#9

[quote=sparkle]Good Topic. I, for one Love, beautiful lingerie, but tasteful too.

My H, being that he is subject to problems of this nature, (see my past posts) has at times given me very racy, yuccy, slutty lingerie, which I really did take offense to. I threw them all away, and told him why too.

I think there really is a fine line to know and distinguish what is appropriate and what is not. Just because we are married and a Christian, IMO, is not cause to subject ourselves to trash and just mold to the world and all it’s garbage, making “sex” first and foremost in our minds. To be tasteful, elegant, and truly a woman, comes first,and IMO, needs to be learned, and cultivated, not to be a mindless trashy “sex goddess”, whether married or not. Now, my H knows better. He gave me a beautiful and tasteful nightgown this past Christmas.

God Bless You Original Poster (OP).
[/quote]

Sparkle,

God bless you for the nice post. It was refreshing to read. I agree with you completely that it is a means to enhance a husband and wife’s relations and should not be something used to objectify the wife.

God’s Blessings to you and your family!


#10

[quote=my agatha]I think it has to do with pubescent boys and porn. If a man makes a big deal about it, I assume he spent too much time with the Victoria’s secret catalogue in Junior High, and now has some manufactured image in his head of what “sexy” looks like.
[/quote]

I don’t think this is a healthy assumption. You should not assume anything so negative about anyone unless you know for sure.

Think about it. If I had never seen any sexy ads, porn, T.V., movies, whatever, do you really think that I would not find a woman in lingerie sexy? My wife’s beautiful and sexy no matter what she’s wearing, but I’d have to be lying if I said that some nice lingerie didn’t make it a little sexier.


#11

I don’t bother with it too often. It gets taken off so quickly, it hardly seems worth the effort. :wink:

I remember early in our marriage, I decided to really do myself up for my husband. I put hot rollers in my hair, did my nails and toenails, put on a pretty lingerie set then entered the room to “surprise” my husband. I leaned against the door and purred … “Honey.” Three seconds later, the outfit was off, my hair was a mess, and my makeup smeared.

Afterwards, when my husband was relaxing in endorphins, I asked him how he liked the outfit. His response was, “what outfit?”:rolleyes:

Ah well … to each their own.:slight_smile:


#12

That’s a nice story :slight_smile:


#13

[quote=Mirror Mirror]Why is it that some people make it out to be such a big deal if a wife wears lingerie for her husband? I remember a post from several months ago about this issue and I could not find it, but I was wondering what others thought about this. Do people consider this offensive? (All this is in the context of a married relationship, in the privacy of each other.)

Personally, I see nothing wrong with my wife wearing lingerie, but I would not force her to do so.
[/quote]

I think it depends on the lingerie. Just as for swimwear it depends on the swimwear. Modesty is a virtue that is supposed to be operative both in more public places (like beaches) as well as in more private places (like a bedroom). If a lingerie is for lack of a better word “ostentatious” or “primitive” then it would be wrong IMO. Even in marital relations, one should not be directed by the lower passions; rather these lower passions should be subsumed under the higher desires and higher thoughts … so that the bedroom is more of a “symphony” if you will as opposed to “hip hop” or whatever that rubbish is called :smiley:

Modesty is also not just about clothing. Modesty is a virtue that governs one’s general conduct – including how one moves, speaks (or keeps silent), and so forth.

Even bedroom conduct should comport with the dignity of man and woman, a dignity which is forever higher than that of a savage or beast.


#14

[quote=pira114]I don’t think this is a healthy assumption. You should not assume anything so negative about anyone unless you know for sure.

Think about it. If I had never seen any sexy ads, porn, T.V., movies, whatever, do you really think that I would not find a woman in lingerie sexy? My wife’s beautiful and sexy no matter what she’s wearing, but I’d have to be lying if I said that some nice lingerie didn’t make it a little sexier.
[/quote]

I’m not talking about “finding it appealing.” I’m talking about making it a point of contention.


#15

I think if a woman wants to deck herself out for her husband, she should! When we get married we become gifts of ourselves to each other, there is something wonderful about a little gift wrapping once in a while :slight_smile: men will always really appreciate it.

+T+
Michael

http://www.wholesalefavors.com/Merchant2/graphics/00000001/wrap.jpg


#16

[quote=Mirror Mirror]Why is it that some people make it out to be such a big deal if a wife wears lingerie for her husband? I remember a post from several months ago about this issue and I could not find it, but I was wondering what others thought about this. Do people consider this offensive? (All this is in the context of a married relationship, in the privacy of each other.)

Personally, I see nothing wrong with my wife wearing lingerie, but I would not force her to do so.
[/quote]

Lingerie? My husband has given me absolutely beautiful lingerie over the years. He has also given me a miter saw, a router with a full set of drill bits, a belt sander, and a drill press. Bless his heart though, he has never given me a vacuum cleaner, a mop, or new cooking appliance. Those are just purchased when needed.


#17

[quote=Ana]I don’t bother with it too often. It gets taken off so quickly, it hardly seems worth the effort. :wink:

I remember early in our marriage, I decided to really do myself up for my husband. I put hot rollers in my hair, did my nails and toenails, put on a pretty lingerie set then entered the room to “surprise” my husband. I leaned against the door and purred … “Honey.” Three seconds later, the outfit was off, my hair was a mess, and my makeup smeared.

Afterwards, when my husband was relaxing in endorphins, I asked him how he liked the outfit. His response was, “what outfit?”:rolleyes:

Ah well … to each their own.:slight_smile:
[/quote]

My husband is always asking me to take my clothes off, not put them on. And I never doll myself up with makeup or lipstick or perfumes either. He’s allergic. :smiley:


#18

I try to work on dolling up my “birthday suit”. Clean, good smelling hair, smooth moisturized skin (with scented lotion), and fresh breath.:slight_smile: I don’t have a problem with lingerie per se, just doesn’t seem to have much importance for us.

Never really thought about the morality of it. Off the top of my head I would think if both parties agree there certainly is nothing wrong with it, provided it’s tasteful and helps instead of hinders a healthy sexual union. Oh yeah, and if it’s the woman that’s wearing it.:stuck_out_tongue:

Scary thinking of a man in a thong…Yuck.


#19

I enjoy lingerie but my husband thinks it is a total waste! In the early years of marriage I would buy items as a surprise but he was like “UH, yeah I just don’t see the point!” Says he just likes me the way I am! He especially hates anything tacky or slutty looking.


#20

This post got me thinking, so I tried the whole lingerie thing last night.

My wife just laughed and told me to take it off. Oh, well.


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