Stage five, this is where they have to get creative with everything that has been conveyed along with obscuring the truth, even if they have to lie to themselves about it, I call this the dillusionial stage, for that past reality is now something entirely different from what was experienced initially. They do this as a way of justifying their actions in their minds and to get you thrown off guard, regardless of how much they have to twist the truth, you realize that there is nothing you or anybody else could have done differently, they had it set in their mind that this was never going to go anywhere and you have been used and played all along.
This last one, I really let my guard down for I thought having the church in common was going to be enough, I found out after the fact, it was used against me, it was too easy for her to think she was helping with some area of my life, when in fact, she was driving me away from it. To expand a bit here, I’ve had a very tough life, so much so many people would have been driven insane, a big part of it has been facing spiritual attack by the evil one, he knows the most effective way to get me down is to dangle this carrot in front of me, only to rip it away once I am totally emotionally involved. He uses women as pawns for these and has proven himself effective with this approach. Part of me really just wants to harden my heart, and for a number of years I was successful in doing so, yet not any more, yet I would be lying if I was not cynical with relationships in general, how can I not be, for it’s the same pattern, over and over again and the ones that did the most damage were the long distance ones.
The truth comes out when they have to face the fact, you are going to be there in person, all of a sudden you get updated photo’s, you find out they aren’t in such good shape physically and emotionall, you find out they were never willing to relocate, or have you relocate to them, for they know they would not stand a chance of this working out in the real world entirely because they have to be honest with you now.
I have done these several times, all of the patterns are the same, you are not allowed to just bow out gracefully, they cannot stand that, they then try to rehash every little iota of detail that was conveyed in the past and turn it against you. All of that loyalty you showed them, all of the subtle gestures, anything and everything they can use against you, they do and some of them drum up such fiction, you wonder if they are writing from a script, or if they were trying their best to find fault anyway they can, just so they can justify their actions.
Folks, if anybody approaches you online from anywhere, please, please learn from my lessons, these do not work, and you now have a reference point to take note of when they follow this same pattern, it’s always the same, always predictable, and in the end, you will come out with the short end of the stick. Do not feel sorry for them and get sucked into their games, there is a good reason they cannot find anybody locally, you will eventually find out just why soon enough, and with this last one, I tried my best not to get emotionally involved, yet I found it impossible to do, so I end up sacrificing my heart, just so someone can play their petty, immature games, just for their amusement. If you find yourself in one and break it off, make sure it’s very clear, not to contact each other for any reason what so ever, this will allow you to heal and move on, there is no excuse for putting you through these, none at all, do not feel obligated to even be nice about it, just say good bye and leave me alone, if they cannot get that straight, use harsher words until they do.