I am just about at my wit's end and on the verge of sliding once again into despair.
My well-educated husband finished law school 2 years ago, right at the time the economy took a nose dive. He has had one job in that time, lasting about 4 months as a contractor, and other than working with me, nothing. About 2 months ago, he went to stay with his parents in a larger metro area about 1000 miles away with the hopes of improving his job search.
Since there, he sends out resumes, has registered with several temp agencies, but nothing. He has not been offered any interviews or even a longer-term temp job (in his field or otherwise). He gets rejections or no word at all. We are so sad at this state of affairs.
Before law school, he had trouble finding a job in his former field, and went to law school to change careers. I have been working full time for about 8 years, and am responsible for all of our bills (house, car, health insurance, student loans (his and mine), etc.). I feel like the entire burden is on me, and has been since 2002 (he has been unemployed for long stretches of time or in grad / law school).
He is not eligible for unemployment.
I asked him to stay on a stipend of about $750 in credit card expenses and $200 in cash each month. His parents feed and house him for free.
He is incapable of keeping to this budget. Instead, he buys collectibles and other non-necessary items, and the little money he makes in odd jobs he uses to buy these items.
Every month is a huge fight about the creeping upwards credit card bills -- I try to keep to a tight budget and am naturally frugal. It's been this way regardless of whether he is job searching here or in his parents' city, and has been a constant struggle and sore spot since 2008.
Today was another doozy, and it ended with him saying, "I wish I never married you."
I am the person who keeps the household going, including paying for his bar examinations in two states and his student loans. I feel very unappreciated and like he is taking advantage of me.
Sometimes I wonder if our marriage will survive or not. I want to try, but sometimes I am tired of doing so, particularly when he says things like he did today.
We have no children, and I despair that at the rate things are going, we never will. (I am self-employed, and without more income, cannot afford the family coverage we'd need for maternity benefits. Also, I don't know if I could handle trying to take care of children plus him.)
What should I do??? I am not looking forward, I am sad to say, to him coming back here for a visit or permanently. It's a very difficult situation.