[Greetings, to save space, I will place my comments in brackets and a red coloration.]
hey, im new here and i am a former catholic [there is a phrase, “once Catholic, always Catholic.” If you were baptized, I would advise mariafransisca’s advice and go to confession. Believe me, I was once an atheist, and so am plagued with doubts more times than I would like; Confession helps.] who lost my faith around 4 months ago.
there was not a reason to why i lost it, i used my brain and logic and science to come to the conclusion that christianity and god were false. [so, in a way, you chose it? Faith does not disappear on its own, one chooses to stop nurturing it and it atrophies. It is odd. Science and logic are what brought me *into the faith . . . ]
i studied up on this and seen the gospels were written many years after jesus’ death and how jesus is eerily similar to pagan gods. sure He is. Christianity is similar to every religion. Does that make it invalid? No. Here is the issue with seeing similarity with false religions in the true faith and deciding to reject the true faith: the Christ similar to these false gods because He is the fulfillment. If you truly study Catholic Christology, you will notice that where He is similar to a pagan god, He is of the similar attribute to an extreme - He takes the attributes seen as similar and transforms them into something the pagan god had no hope of achieving, because it was through Him that the creative minds which gave birth to the pagan gods were formed to represent their hopes. Christ is the fulfillment of those hopes.]
also science has shown that the brain controls every thought [what else is the brain for?], there is no need for a soul and the theory of an afterlife just seems ridiculous false hope, 70000 people die a day Agnus Dei, qui tollis peccata mundi, dona eis requiem], it seems much more logical for their existance to end, we are only !] humans our life is not more important than a sheep or a panda. [Because sheep and panda have proven capabilities of reason and so can either save or destroy the planet at their collective whim, just like humans? You said you used reason; no creature BUT a human we can identify can use such reason. That is one of the aspects of the human soul: it is rational.]
top scientists have proven god doesnt need to exist ** and darwinism created all living things. [Catholics are free to believe that evolution formed the physical biology of the universe. I do, in fact, and so did Bl. Pope John Paul II and so does His Holiness Pope Benedict XVI. There is evidence that if the theory were around then, even St. Augustine probably would agree.] the facts are undeniable.
however, i dont want to be an atheist [the answer is simple, stop being one.], i want to believe in jesus and an afterlife but it doesnt seem logical or real at all and as karl marx says “religion is the opium of the masses” [and you are using Marx’s words because he was correct about his system of economy? Marx is no authority on philosophy, because he is no philosopher.]
this makes me sad
Perhaps you should stop listening to scientists when asking philosophical questions? Don’t listen to every philosopher, either, for, in the words of Dr. Peter Kreeft, “Philosophers today certainly know science, but they don’t know philosophy.” God cannot be found by science, because He is outside the domain of science, which is physical reality. Does this mean that only physical reality exists? No. It just means we cannot prove or disprove that something else exists with the scientific method. There are limits to science. Use science freely, providing you are doing so morally, within its limits, but outside you HAVE GOT TO turn to philosophy. And I mean true philosophy, not the bunk that’s been pouring out in greater numbers since Descartes. Those ‘philosophers’ are part of the reason philosophy is not taken seriously any more - because their ‘philosophies’ and interpretations are so out of connect with reality the whole field has been dragged into a comical abyss in public opinion. I hope my comments help.