Losing my faith, help

Hello. I’m writing this in the traditional section, so please, know where I’m coming from. I know we all have different opinions regarding “novus ordo” vs TLM. But here’s mine.
I’m losing faith in catholicism because of how irreverent my parish is (and all churches near me, yes, I’ve been church shopping). I’ve seen actual liturgical abuses, words changed and improvised during consecration… and (bad) recorded music, which is contrary to canon law. Nothing there inspires me to worship and pray. There’s no silence, no reverence. These are not just details to me. I’ve tried hard, real hard to ignore all of this and show humility. But I have depression and end up crying whenever I think of Jesus and how much better He deserves.
I don’t live in a very religious area, so only a handful of elderly people attend. I don’t know anyone who would like a latin mass in the area. I don’t even care that much for a latin mass, I just want a good, reverent, orthodox priest who would actually teach the fullness of catholic teaching, not just the peace and love part. I DON’T want to give up on catholicism. But I’m literally losing my faith and that can’t be good. Is anyone in a similar situation? How do you deal with this?


I’m so sorry. I’m also losing my faith because of priest scandals.


So, your solution to giving Jesus what he deserves is to lose your faith?

Mass is not about you, it is about God. Keep looking for a mass you like, but until then, offer it up for Jesus. Do not use things you think are liturgical abuses as a reason to lose your faith. Tune it out and remember why you are really there.


I am sorry to hear this. There have been many threads about this when all of it came to light. You may want to use the search feature and read some of them. We are all sinners, including priests. The scandals represent what certain individuals did wrong. Don’t throw Catholicism or your faith away over it because what they did is not representative of our faith tradition.


If this bothers you too much you may consider to change parish but faith is in Christ, not in the liturgy. Anyway, one priest once told this to a mom who was complaining about how not reverent was the Mass in her parish. The Mass is like cooking dinner for a mom. Dinner is dinner, food is providing nutrition anyway, but there are very simple dinners, festive dinners, gourmet dinners, frozen meals dinners etc.
Gourmet dinners are the best but If I had to come in your home at dinner time would I always find you cooking dinner with the same care? Always a gourmet dinner?

Go to mass locally offer up the frustration it causes you and then go home and stream a mass from a priest you feel is more reverent. Fr. Z posts Latin masses online.


Please correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought Catholicism taught that the services were instituted by God for the growth/nourishment of His people. Thus Liturgy is not “about you” but it is for you, and when it’s done irreverently, that’d be a big problem, right?


My Lord Jesus Christ deserves better than frozen dinners all week.


Pope Francis has expressed the importance of reading the gospels. To me reading the gospels is like listening to God. I think you will find your answer there, it just may take some time. Pray for understanding and it will come.


I’m sorry you’re so upset. :frowning: God loves you so much and when you receive the Eucharist it is you and him: you are his tabernacle and he is your guest inside your heart, and nothing in the world can change that.

I will dedicate a Rosary for you.



Thank you, I appreciate it. :purple_heart:


Are there any other Catholic Churches near that you could attend?


Not every priest is a chef, not every parish has the budget for a sumptuous dinner.
Plus, at the moment, remember that many Catholics stuck at home for the pandemic would love to have even a frozen meal instead of watching other people eating on TV…


No, unfortunately. They’re all like that, here. Some are better than the others, though.

You have a point here, and that’s exactly where I wanted my mind at, but as you know, the errors and “watered down teachings” can be really hard on one’s faith. Why do you think attendance is so low.

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Go to one of the better ones if you can. Also think about when this Corona mess started and we couldn’t go to Mass at all in person.


I don’t think attendance is so low due to less than perfect liturgy. Many people never attended church to begin with, some are not even baptized or left after First Communion. We live in a society that preaches exactly the opposite of what the Church teaches. Young people, especially in urban areas want to fit in, not be considered ‘bigots’. Premarital sex, use of artificial birth control, gay marriage, abortion, euthanasia are now considered ‘rights and freedom’ not sinful acts. Most people in high position are not ashamed to say loud ‘I don’t need God’. A reverent Mass is wonderful but is the society that needs a change of perspective. We live in a society that is not Christian any more.


Exactly. And I live in a rural area! but french canada in general is super liberal. I’m sticking out like a sore thumb here.

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I’m sorry you’re struggling. A few thoughts: first,
do you think your depression may be coloring your perception a bit? If you’re depressed, you may be prone to seeing everything as “meh.”

Second, have you discussed this with your priest? He may not realIze that anyone feels this way. Perhaps if you sat down with him and discussed your concerns, that might help? Obviously discuss it in a respectful way. Not “I’m reverent and you’re not” but just letting him know that you, and possibly other people in the parish, have more traditional aesthetic preferences and maybe he could accommodate that from time to time. He may say no, but at least you’ll have tried.


Yes, without a doubt! It certainly doesn’t help.

I plan on doing that. But I’m super nervous. I’m new here and don’t know the priest personally, yet. I’m also scared of coming off “holier than thou”, that’s not what I want. But when I’m passionate about something, I might accidentally come off that way. :confounded: Thanks for your insight!

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