The language is no worse than the Bible, which speaks of God repenting and changing his mind. The fact is that it’s not really possible to use language that does justice to God, so what we say is imperfect in varying degrees. I think asking God “not to forget” seems to be less in the sense of the memory of the dead passing from the mind of God, and more the sense of asking God to protect them and remember their faith rather than abandoning them to hell. If this kind of language bothers you, please never open up the Psalms.
Another prayer that I don’t know what to do with was from Week I Sunday Evening Prayer 1 which says:
Reward all who have done good to us, Lord, and grant them eternal life.
I’m grateful for all who have done good to us, but is that sufficient for them to gain eternal life?
No, someone doing good to you is not sufficient for their salvation, but the prayer never says it is. We pray all the time for the salvation of heathens, heretics and all sorts of people who probably will never be saved, but that does not mean that we should not pray for them. We pray for them not on the basis of their works, but of God’s grace. Neither does the prayer say that we expect God to grant eternal life to those who have done good to us on the basis that they have done good to us, but rather that he grant eternal life to those who have happened to do good to us. After all, if they do good for us, the. They are our friends, and even publicans return the love of their friends. Surely we should behave no worse than publicans.