Lust/mortal sin

First, I should say that I have OCD and am sometimes plagued with unwanted thoughts, sometimes impure, sometimes blasphemous. Today I was plagued with some impure thoughts. I tried hard not to consent/dwell and don’t think I did. But I tend to analyze thoughts in my mind to try to figure out if I’ve sinned or not. I’m pretty sure that any consent I had was venial. (I’ve studied this topic thoroughly in the past–of how to discern between mortal and venial sins of thought). But then I tried to figure out whether I had “Lust in the heart” and have heard that “lust in the heart” means “I would if i could (or if I had the opportunity).” Well, if I had the opportunity I would NOT. However, I thought to myself, “But if this were NOT a sin–if it was okay with God–I probably would. But it ISN’T okay with God and so I would not do it for I do not want to offend Him nor do I want to sin.” Was that a mortal sin to think: “If it wasn’t a sin–if God allowed this–then I would do it.”? I’m trying to figure out if I need to go to confession or if this is a venial sin that I can confess directly to God.

Why would you possibly think this would be wrong? Is this mortal sin…venial sin…I think you left out the option of no sin at all.

Avoiding sin so not to offend God is meritorious.

Love is a choice. You’re choosing not to do this.

You should ask yourself… How do I keep from having these thoughts?

It’s obvious you are developing your conscience and getting better at the struggle of temptation.

You likely need to pray more.

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