Why is it that now that my mom knows I want to be a priest she makes fun of me wanting to go to seminary? She says to me, “Don’t worry, you will have lots of fun sleeping on a cot in seminary.” It is really annoying.
Praying for you. If God is calling you; nothing will stand in your way. God bless you.
Perhaps u can talk to her about that?
Anyway, I’ll pray for u, but do your best to not let it get to u and to “offer it up”, as they say.
Maybe she’s afraid of losing you - thinking you will leave and she’ll never see you again?
Perhaps try talking to her about her concerns and let her know she’ll always be in your life because she’s your mom. And, think about taking her to the seminary with you for a visit so she can see what life there would be like for you - your vocations director should be able to help you set up the visit and help you with strategies for handling the situation with your mom.
It sounds like she is trying to dissuade you from applying to/entering seminary. Have you tried asking her why she feels the need to make those comments? It may sound harsh, but if you are following God’s call, who is she, or any of us to judge? Pray for her, and for God to show her, if this is your calling, that entering seminary is what you must do to become a Priest. I will pray for you, and I wish you luck, friend.
It’s because she’s your mom, and she loves you, and she is worried about you. I imagine she still thinks of you as her little child, and whether you will be off to college or seminary, you will be so far away (even if you are in the same town), and making grown-up decisions for yourself. Parents have some anxieties when their kids leave home. Some parents worry more gracefully than others.
Perhaps she has specific concerns that she is not comfortable to talk about, hence the kidding and the tension. Maybe she has always envisioned that you would marry and have a family. Maybe she is worried that you will not be happy. Maybe she thinks that some people will think unkindly of the priesthood. These are difficult things to talk about, but perhaps you and she can approach such topics when the moment is right, like a quiet (not too busy) time when there are just the two of you. You might be able to start things off by asking her how she feels about your vocation. Well, you know your mom best and you can figure out how to start that conversation. Talking about it might help her to be less anxious and more supportive.
Well, what can you do? Love your mom back. Respect her. If you demonstrate good judgement and responsibility, that may reassure her that you will be all right when you are an adult on your own. If you let her know what’s happening in your life, keep the lines of communication wide open, don’t keep too many secrets, that will ease her anxieties. Once in a while, maybe you can return the joke. “Sleeping on a cot? Only at Christmas and Easter. Other times it’s a straw mat on the cold stone floor.”
God bless you and your family.
Don’t let it bother you. If it weren’t for my step-mother I’d have gone to seminary for minor formation. Then again had I gone then I perhaps wouldn’t know the things I now know so it was a trade off. Praying for you as well… Hail Mary… :gopray2:
Tell her you’ll be praying for her soul while laying on your cot!
Seriously if you feel you are being called to the Priesthood …go and follow God’s calling!
While I don’t know you or your mother, there is a difference between teasing and making fun of someone. She may be teasing you in a way that deals with HER nervousness or uncertainties about what you want to do.
Remember that it’s not just that you want to go to seminary, but also that your making a decision like this is an indication that “her baby” is growing up (and is no longer her “baby”). She might say the same thing, for instance, if you had told her that you wanted to enlist in the Marines…
Don’t worry about the small stuff. You may want to talk with her about it, but it is your maturity and so on that will be the most persuasive way to convince her that you are mature enough to make such a decision–not getting upset about something relatively minor. Just 2 cents from someone a bit older than you (and not necessarily wiser)…
It’s called passive aggressive behavior. Really she sounds angry with you for your choice, but instead of dealing with her anger, it seeps out in faux “good natured” teasing. You knew she would react poorly which is why you took so long to tell her. What a shame she is so consumed with her own feelings and her own goals for you that she is not really present to discuss your own plans and dreams. If she continues on the same track, she will only create distance between you. Show her this post.
Ah…that’s a shame. We actually should welcome people who have vocations, encourage them. We should be especially be proud if one comes from our own families, since it is a special blessing. If we had more priests, I believe the world would be a better place.
If we realized all the good they did, we’d be putting up seminaries and all, everywhere!
Priests are in such short supply, and it’s projected to get worse.
One priest here where I live in Mexico did the closest a priest would do to complain. He said he was once in WalMart, and people would see him, make all kinds of comments. One was asking him why he was there!
He said to us, “Do you think it’s easy wearing this collar?” So, I wish I could give you better news, but from what I can gather, you will probably need to get used to these kinds of comments, since this will probably be just the “tip of the iceberg”.
However, it must be so much worse coming from one’s own family! That’s terrible. A lot of saints also had that very same problem. Their families would be very unsupportive and often oppose the decision. So, at least you’re in good company there!
I don’t mean to, in any way, diminish your sufferings. Here you are, all excited about your decision, and they are putting you/it down at every turn. That can’t be much fun.
I hope you can manage to get some kind of moral/emotional support, from others, to help you through this difficult phase.
I’m glad you feel comfortable to come on the forum and at least share this with us, so we can try to give you an encouraging word and maybe say a prayer.
Speaking of prayers, let me close with one!
Hail Mary, Full of Grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blest is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
Christ suffered crucifixion for us; what are you willing to suffer for Him?
Pray and offer it up as a beautiful sacrifice, Just as He did. In this way we can all be “priests” in some way.
As for sleeping on a cot,
when you attend a CRHP Renewal weekend,
guess where you sleep?
On a cot …
I did …
and it was an Awesome experience !!!
But then, I’m kinda strange …
in my first apartment, I didn’t have a bed
but instead was happy enough with a sleeping bag on the floor
because it felt like camping and being adventurous
so it was fun.
Oddly enough, it was my mom who insisted I have a normal bed,
the first time my parents came to visit me in my apartment.
You’ll deal with all kinds of people when you’re a priest …