Three years ago, at the time of my 3rd C-Section, I had a tubal ligation. I am an insulin-dependant diabetic and had vascular surgery 6 weeks prior to giving birth to this child. I kind of felt pushed into this decision with my major medical complications, but had it done anyway. Last year, I had uterine surgery done to take care of some fibriods (non-cancerous tumors that cause hideous and prolonged bleeding). This means that even if we were to win the lottery and could pay for a tubal ligation reversal, the lining of my uterus would never support a pregnancy. I really want to return to the Church, but feel like I cannot because I cannot make reparation for what I’ve done and cannot have any more children. What does the Church do in cases like mine?
Repentance … Confession … welcome home.
Sterilization is objectively a grave sin, but its not an excommunicatible offense.
Confess it like any other sin.
I think the sin would be the actual strerilization, not being sterile in itself. It burns me up how they ask if you want a tubal at the most inconvienent time, during your c-section. When I’m very pregnant or in labor, the last thing on my mind is having another child.
All you need to do is go to confession. End of story
I am in your position also…decided that because of the gestational diabetes that occurred in my last pregnancy, I thought it would be for my best interest to have a tubal. Regret the decision to this day, for I’m always telling my husband that I should not have had my tubes tied, and even tho I’m 42 years old, I long to have more children.
I came back to the Church earlier this year, and made my confession to a priest, who absolved me of my sin. I am grateful for the wonderful gift of the Sacrement of Reconciliation, and knowing that God loves me, and unconditionally pours out his mercy to me.
Please go to Confession. It’s a wonderful first step back to the Church!
all you have to do is repent (which you already have) and Confess. rest assured, nothing more is required of you on this front. the Church does not ask the impossible of you, so don’t let an over-inflated sense of guilt keep you from returning.
When you go to confession, try to find a priest who is on board w/ the Church’s teaching in this area. I confessed something similar to a liberal priest and his comment was, “It’s between you and your doctor how many kids you have.” I really needed advice and support and needless to say, I did not get it! Good luck. —KCT
[quote=KCT]When you go to confession, try to find a priest who is on board w/ the Church’s teaching in this area. I confessed something similar to a liberal priest and his comment was, “It’s between you and your doctor how many kids you have.” I really needed advice and support and needless to say, I did not get it! Good luck. —KCT
Doctor? Not your husband? Wow. The most disheartening thing to me is when people are seeking the Truth and someone hands them reletivism instead. I’m really sorry you (or anyone) had that experience.
Unfortunately in my case, my OB/GYN said she thought another pregnancy could be done, it would need to be monitored very closely (she does very high-risk pregnancies). It was my husband who said he preferred we not have any more children. He still doesn’t think it was a grave sin. I need prayers to get him back to the Church. His last Mass was at this child’s baptism in June of 2002. Thank you all for such loving and charitable advice, I definitely need that.