My wife and I have been married for five years. We met in college, and she always dreamed of being a stay at home mom.
Fast-forward to our fourth year of marriage.
We had tried getting pregnant since we got married. Doctors say it is “unexplained infertility”. Rather than spending thousands on drugs, we decided to adopt. (But that’s beside the point.)
Somewhere between wedding day and today, it seems the disappointment of infertility has caused my wife to abandon her dream of being a stay at home mom and instead invest her energy into her job of teaching religion at a Catholic school.
Now that we have adopted, she doesn’t want to stay home. She’s perfectly fine sending our baby to day care and private school, and has no interest in homeschooling. She loves her job, but it is at the expense of what I believe to be the well-being of our baby.
I feel like I’ve gotten the “bait and switch”.
Aside from the stay at home issues, my wife absolutely always has to have her way. She always wants to go have fun at the expense of duties at home. She doesn’t apologize when I feel she has wronged me. She pouts when she doesn’t get her way. I talked to my mother in law who gave my wife a copy of “The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands”, and my wife took offense. The other day she acknowledged she doesn’t think she’s an obedient wife, then justified it.
A few months ago I was diagnosed with a moderate non-life threatening sickness, but before I was diagnosed, I had several spells of nausea, severe fatigue, etc., and my wife just complained to my face about how I was useless when I was sick, and that I needed to tough it out. No compassion.
What do I do? I feel like the love is gone from our marriage. Please help me.