Marriage during Lent (possibly Laetare Sunday?)


#1

What would be the general consensus on that?


#2

Per this page, which is quite well done and well-researched:

What days and times should we avoid scheduling our Catholic wedding?
You may schedule your wedding for any day or time you like except for Good Friday and Holy Saturday during Triduum. You may also want to avoid scheduling your wedding during Advent (the time from four Sundays before Christmas through Christmas Eve) or Lent (the penitential period of about forty days between Ash Wednesday and Easter); weddings held during these times should take into account the fact that the whole Church is observing a special period of penance.

Your pastor may advise you to "tone down" your wedding if you choose to hold it during this period, and a wedding Mass held on a Saturday evening or Sunday during these periods will have to include the readings for that Sunday rather than readings of your own choosing.

Finally, be aware that your local parish may limit the times and days when you may celebrate your wedding, for practical reasons. You should definitely coordinate a date with your parish before reserving that reception hall!

Some dioceses have policies concerning marriage during Lent; some, as I understand, do not allow it. All, as the answer above indicates, would probably have you tone down some of the decor and liturgical music and ceremony so as to better fit in with the time. Ask your pastor.

-ACEGC


#3

Also, many parishes and diocese do not permit Sunday weddings.


#4

Our parish doesn't allow weddings during Lent at all.


#5

Even if the possibility exists to marry during Lent, it could be worth considering that every wedding anniversary would likely occur during Lent as well. Potentially, it’s not just the wedding itself that would need “toning down.”


#6

Our parish frowns up on it. My personal opinion, why would you want to get married during Lent? Its not a season of joy in the Catholic calendar. Why would you want to receive the Sacrament of Matrimony when we are suppose to be concentrating on the repentance and fasting?


#7

You would not be allowed any flowers in the wedding, according to the GIRM (unless, of course, it was on Laetare).

Moderation should be observed in the decoration of the altar.

  1. During advent the floral decoration of the altar should be marked by a moderation suited to the character of this time of year, without expressing in anticipation the full joy of the Nativity of the Lord. During Lent it is forbidden for the altar to be decorated with flowers. exceptions, however, are Laetare Sunday (fourth Sunday of Lent), Solemnities, and feasts. Floral decoration should always show moderation and be arranged around the altar rather than on the altar table.

#8

My daughter was married during Lent 12 years ago. Permission had to be obtained from the Bishop. The decorations were quite simple and she chose beautiful classical sacred music and had an organist and string quintet from the local university's music school. It was a very dignified, beautiful, and solemn wedding Mass.

Since the floral bill was so small, she was able to spend more on the reception and had a live band and great food. We did not highly decorate the hall either, just simple table decorations. Everyone really enjoyed this simply decorated wedding reception with the lively music and tasty food.


#9

[quote="Deo_Gratias42, post:3, topic:292679"]
Also, many parishes and diocese do not permit Sunday weddings.

[/quote]

Also, many cannot accommodate Sunday weddings. We have eight masses every Sunday. All have a full church. There isn't room for a wedding party at a regular mass or time for a separate mass.


#10

[quote="UpUpAndAway, post:5, topic:292679"]
Even if the possibility exists to marry during Lent, it could be worth considering that every wedding anniversary would likely occur during Lent as well. Potentially, it's not just the wedding itself that would need "toning down."

[/quote]

This. My daughter was born on Ash Wednesday and so every few years her birthday is during Lent - which has even meant no Birthday cake.

Talk to your Pastor now and see what he says, but I recommend considering other dates.


#11

[quote="UpUpAndAway, post:5, topic:292679"]
Even if the possibility exists to marry during Lent, it could be worth considering that every wedding anniversary would likely occur during Lent as well. Potentially, it's not just the wedding itself that would need "toning down."

[/quote]

I was married during Lent 26 years ago. Since it was in Feb. my anniversary rarely falls during Lent. I don't remember any problems then but we had a late morning ceremony and the priest at the time said nothing about getting special permission from anyone. We just had a simple luncheon afterward. The priest told us it was ok and we had 2 rose flower arrangements by the alter.


#12

It’s perfectly fine. Just absolutely no flowers adorning the church and no organ or other instrumental music at all (good excuse to use Gregorian chant), unless it’s on Laetare Sunday or a solemnity.


#13

[quote="JGMendes4049, post:12, topic:292679"]
It's perfectly fine. Just absolutely no flowers adorning the church and no organ or other instrumental music at all (good excuse to use Gregorian chant), unless it's on Laetare Sunday or a solemnity.

[/quote]

Never heard of instrumental music not being permitted. My daughter's wedding during Lent had no such restriction. Please show where you got this from.


#14

GIRM no 313. “In Lent the playing of the organ and musical instruments is allowed only in order to support the singing. Exceptions, however, are Laetare Sunday (fourth Sunday of Lent), Solemnities, and feasts.”

Your daughter’s wedding should have had no instrumental music (ie, without singing), and should have only used instruments if necessary to support those who were singing.


#15

[quote="superamazingman, post:14, topic:292679"]
GIRM no 313. "In Lent the playing of the organ and musical instruments is allowed only in order to support the singing. Exceptions, however, are Laetare Sunday (fourth Sunday of Lent), Solemnities, and feasts."

Your daughter's wedding should have had no instrumental music (ie, without singing), and should have only used instruments if necessary to support those who were singing.

[/quote]

Too bad. That was 12 years ago and it was a beautiful solemn Nuptial Mass, and nothing was done that was not permitted by the Bishop and the Pastor of the parish. The guidelines and rules were followed very carefully since my daughter was receiving special permission to get married at that time and did not want to mess things up. I suspect there may be an interpretation thing going on, since a wedding is not the usual daily or Sunday Mass.

At any rate it doesn't matter and the happily married couple have 2 lovely daughters now.:)


#16

[quote="CB_Catholic, post:15, topic:292679"]
Too bad. That was 12 years ago and it was a beautiful solemn Nuptial Mass, and nothing was done that was not permitted by the Bishop and the Pastor of the parish. The guidelines and rules were followed very carefully since my daughter was receiving special permission to get married at that time and did not want to mess things up. I suspect there may be an interpretation thing going on, since a wedding is not the usual daily or Sunday Mass.

At any rate it doesn't matter and the happily married couple have 2 lovely daughters now.:)

[/quote]

and you shouldn't feel bad about it either since I was married during Lent too and the Pastor at the time 26 years ago said it was ok and that the restriction against weddings during lent did not apply anymore. lent is more than fasting, it is also focussing on doing good, taking more time to pray and read, giving to others etc. Yes, the church is bare during Lent but we were never told it was against the rules not to have music (we had a pianist) and flowers.
No one should make anyone else feel bad about what was allowed in the past by a Catholic Priest.


#17

An advantage to a wedding in Lent (like the Saturday before Passion Sunday) allows a honeymoon that includes the Triduum in Rome :eek:

Our Anniversary is on Easter Saturday. Never been in Lent yet :thumbsup: Of course, every year we have to look up what day our anniversary is. BTW my mom’s Anniversary is Easter Monday.


#18

That’s my kind of honeymoon.


#19

[quote="superamazingman, post:18, topic:292679"]
That's my kind of honeymoon.

[/quote]

That's where our honeymoon was, but we were a week late :shrug:


#20

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