Marrying in another parish


#1

Hi,

apologies if i’ve posted this in the wrong place but I have searched the forum and I can’t find any answers. I was hoping somebody could help.

My Fiancee and I are hoping to get married in September next year and my Fiancee has always wanted to get married in a church which is outside of our particular parish. I spoke with the parish priest and he advised that as we don’t have any connections with his parish we would need to “live” there but only for 8 days before we could get married there. He mentioned something about contacting a registrar but i’ve been searching for a week now and left messages and emails and nobody seems to know how i’d go about something like this or is getting back to me. I’ve tried the parish priest but he’s gone on holiday for a fortnight since I spoke to him!

Does anybody know how we would go about getting married in a particular parish that you don’t have a connection to?

I did neglect to mention at the time that my Fiancee’s Father lived on an air force base n the parish 30 years ago. Would that help at all?

thanks for your time.

Pete.


#2

There are lots of things that may come into play here, the biggest of which is the Church you want to marry in in the same diocese that you belong to? If not, it could casue some problems, but it should not be impossible.

My best advice is to call the parish where you ***want ***to get married, and ask them what their policies are and go from there.

Good luck! :slight_smile:


#3

Hi,

thanks for getting back to me. No, that’s my problem, its a different diocese. have you heard of “living” in a parish for 8 days? I’m sure the parish Priest will be very helpful, I was just hoping to find out a bit more now because he’s away for two weeks.

Do you think it would be possible to meet the criteria if my Fiancees Father has previously lived in the parish?

thanks again.

Pete.


#4

As a general rule you should not get married in a church where neither you or your fiance are members of the community. This is spelled out on cannon 1115.

Can. 1115

Marriages are to be celebrated in a parish where either of the contracting parties has a domicile, quasidomicile, or month long residence or, if it concerns transients, in the parish where they actually reside. With the permission of the proper ordinary or proper pastor, marriages can be celebrated elsewhere.

The last sentence basically says that you should obtain permission from either your bishop or the pastor of your parish to be married outside of the parish church. If it is really that important to be married in that building then you should contact the pastor of the church you actually attend and first ask if you can get married outside the parish and secondly ask him to contact the pastor of the church you’d like to get married in.

One item of note. Many parishes charge higher fees for couples that are not part of the community.


#5

Each Bishop sets the “norms” for his diocese.
I have never heard of the “8 day rule”, but I do know a couple of people who have been married in a diocese other than where they lived.
It took some extra time & effort, but it is do-able.
Again, I would start with the parish were you want to get married, they would be able to answer your questions much better than random people on the internet, only because it is up to the Ordinary to make the rules and what happens in one diocese may or may not be allowed in another.


#6

Great, thanks for both your replies. This is very helpful.

thanks very much.

Pete.


#7

You are not in a rush for anything. When the priest returns, you can ask permission to be married in his church. (The parish secretary may have an answer even while the priest is away.)

Find out their answer and if it is “yes” - prepare in the way the priest ask of you. If the answer is “no” - prepare for the sacrament in a different parish.

Congratulations on your upcoming Sacrament of Holy Matrimony.


#8

Don’t sweat it. My wife and I were married in another state because we desired the TLM for our wedding. That was in 1999 and the closest parish was the ICRSS in Rockford, IL. We did all of our marriage prep with a priest who a in our diocese, but not our parish priest. When we went to be married Fr. Bovee of the ICRSS and his staff obtained the necessary permissions, etc. and we were married. It took a few extra weeks to contact everyone, etc., but that should not be a problem.

It was actually harder to get the marriage license in Illinois since we were both residents of another state.


#9

Hi,

thanks for the replies.

I’m worried really about the church getting booked up in the meantime. It seems as though everybody we speak to is getting married next September.

I also have another slight problem. Im married already and hope to arrange an annulment too. I spoke to a friend of a friend recently who went through the same thing and said that it was a straight forward process, particularly as she knows my back ground and she does believe my grounds for annulment are correct but I’m still fearing that this will delay things a lot and we’ll miss out on the church.

thanks,

Pete.


#10

Your thinking seems to be quite backward on this one.


#11

Sorry, I don't follow?


#12

Well that is a completely different type of wrench in the works. I would never advise anyone with a previous marriage to make marriage plans until they have a decleration on nullity in hand. To be honest I wouldn’t advise dating without the declaration, but that’s a different question… Depending on your diocese and the basis for the request it could be a couple months to a year plus before a decleration is granted, if at all. Never assume that a decleration will be granted. You can hope, but it is always possible that your marriage is found to be valid.

To be honest we won’t even start more than some initial prep work when one party is not known to be free to marry. I would concentrate on making sure that you can marry rather than how you might get married outside of your parish.


#13

A Catholic church generally will not allow a wedding to be booked unless both parties are currently free to marry. If you are seeking an annulment, that process must be completed before you can set a wedding date. It cannot be presumed that an annulment will be granted, and they generally take several months. If the issue for the previous marriage is lack of form, it might only take a couple of weeks, either way, you must deal with this issue first.


#14

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