Mass behavior for all


#1

These links are NOT just for arguments sake but for us all, MYSELF INCLUDED to NOT forget WHAT the Mass is and WHO the Mass is about. I’m not lecturing, like I said this is good for me to be reminded of myself. I admitted in another post I was a “chatter” before Mass. I am trying to improve on that. Because we LOVE Our Lord we will do what we have to when we go to Mass. It just shows our LOVE for Him. Because we are NOT there for the priest, for the deacon, for the Church ladies, for the choir, for anybody in the pew—WE ARE AT MASS FOR GOD but we get out of Mass what we bring to it (attitude, interior frame of mind and how prepared we are). God Bless all of y’all because as a cradle to grave, womb to tomb, devout practicing Catholic who LOVES my Catholic Church/Faith I want what’s best for Her and for us that belong to Her.

https://www.catholiceducation.org/en/culture/catholic-contributions/appropriate-behavior-in-church.html
http://www.catholic365.com/article/1640/forgotten-mass-etiquette.html

http://www.catholicconvert.com/blog/2015/03/17/etiquette-at-mass-reasonable-dos-and-donts-for-polite-and-proper-worship/

http://catholicblogger1.blogspot.com/2013/02/mass-etiquette.html?

http://www.aggiecatholicblog.org/2014/09/mass-etiquette-20-things-to-do-and-not-do-in-mass/

https://catholicsstrivingforholiness.com/2015/07/28/church-and-mass-etiquette-loving-jesus-in-the-holy-eucharist/amp/
http://www.elizabethclareblog.com/undeniable-laws-of-mass-behavior/


#2

This seems like a rather amazing amount of handwringing over “kids these days” to manage to actually say very little. Then again, I’ve attended on a regular basis, what, 5 or 6 different parishes? I’ve never seen the level of irreverence that some people seem to claim, unless one has decided that not wearing an (expensive and hard to clean) suit and tie to Mass is irreverent.


Can y'all close a post I started, PLEASE!
#3

Good reasonable advice.


#4

I agree 100% with the blogger on this. Of course the perfect parents will respond letting us know how difficult it is to manage multiple children at Mass.

In my opinion of children in church, having taken my kids and now my grandkids to church is the need to set the good example. I’ve seen families manage this very well in different parishes and others who just let chaos reign during church. No one rises to low expectations.


#5

added to original post


#6

Maybe he doesn’t want to seem cynical or condescending but he is.

First off, for young children we know alot more about the actual dangers of making them hold their pee. (I’m talking the 2-5 crowd). Yea, you try not to make it a habit…but kids. Also, might I point out that in years past breastfeeding mothers stayed home.

Secondly, heaven help ANYONE–even a Bishop-- who would try and suggest that say, a hoodie, is never appropriate for Mass. When I’m big and huge and heavily pregnant, it’s cold out and nothing fits I’m wearing a freaking hoodie. If someone tried to get smarmy and say “well what would you do if you had to go to a wedding” I probably wouldn’t. Through my college years and into my early working years Mass wear was whatever I was wearing at work that I busted my butt to get to there. During busy season at the bookstore managers were required to stop wearing polos and wear teeshirts with somewhat idiotic slogans on them.

Like Darklight, unless you’re going to claim that anything below a suit and tie is irreverent I’d say 95% of the people I see are dressed incredibly appropriatly. Sometimes kids come in their sports uniforms.

But I’m not shoving my preschooler into a dress or a button up shirt because “reverence”. It’s enough that their clothes are clean. I’d love to see the look on this priest’s face the day I had my 3 week old at Mass at an un-airconditioned church where it was a heat-wave and upwards of 100 degrees. I stripped her down to her disposable diaper. The horror.


#7

The effort we put into a thing directly impacts what we get out of a thing. There are some who will always fall back on the tired excuse, it’s just too hard, while others will make tremendous effort to ensure they are doing the right thing.

From kids to grandkids, I’ve taken them to church. It’s never easy but there should be no excuse for children not being prepared for Mass.


#8

I KNOW–no lectures on John Corapi, please.

" Etiquette for Holy Mass by Father John Corapi
Please remember the two fundamental principles upon which our behavior and attitudes in church rest:

  1. The church is a sacred space! It is the “Lord’s house” where we come to worship God together.
  2. Mass is a holy and sacred act! It is during the Mass when all the graces and merits of our Lord’s sacrifice are applied to our souls in a sacramental fashion.
    If you keep these two principles in mind, all the following points of Mass etiquette will make perfect sense.
  1. Please dress appropriately. We should dress for Mass as if a King had invited us to a wedding feast, for that is what Mass truly is. Jesus, our King, is the groom and we are his bride. Who would show up to a wedding improperly dressed? Therefore, we should wear our best for the Lord.
  2. Please arrive to Mass punctually. It is a good idea to arrive at Mass on time in order to participate in the entire liturgy. After finding your seat, take the opportunity to review the Bible readings, prepare yourself in prayer, or reflect on what you wish to bring to Jesus during the Mass. Arriving on time is also respectful to other parishioners because it prevents distractions once Mass has begun.
  3. Please turn off your devices. This includes cell-phones, pagers, or anything else that rings, beeps, or buzzes.
  4. Please do not bring any food, drink, or gum into the church.
  5. Please reverently genuflect towards the tabernacle before sitting down. We do this to show respect to Jesus, our crucified King, who is present body, blood, soul and divinity in the hosts that are preserved in the tabernacle.
  6. Please stay until the end of Mass. Mass ends when Father gives the final blessing then says, “The Mass is ended, go in peace” and we say: “Thanks be to God.” The final blessing is very powerful and will aid and protect you throughout the week. You are encouraged to stay and sing the final recessional hymn as well. Attending Mass in its entirety from beginning to end will give you a fuller, richer experience than leaving right away.
  7. Please exit the church reverently and respectfully. Again, this is to show respect to other parishioners and our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament. There is a custom where some people stay several minutes after Mass in thanksgiving for the Eucharist they have just received. You are encouraged to do the same."

#9

I hope y’all understand what I am trying to say here. I mean it from the heart.
These links are NOT just for arguments sake but for us all, MYSELF INCLUDED to NOT forget WHAT the Mass is and WHO the Mass is about. I’m not lecturing, like I said this is good for me to be reminded of myself. I admitted in another post I was a “chatter” before Mass. I am trying to improve on that. Because we LOVE Our Lord we will do what we have to when we go to Mass. It just shows our LOVE for Him. Because we are NOT there for the priest, for the deacon, for the Church ladies, for the choir, for anybody in the pew—WE ARE AT MASS FOR GOD but we get out of Mass what we bring to it (attitude, interior frame of mind and how prepared we are). God Bless all of y’all because as a cradle to grave, womb to tomb, devout practicing Catholic who LOVES my Catholic Church/Faith I want what’s best for Her and for us that belong to Her.


#10

I’ve pointed out before, of course, that I’ve had plenty of times of going straight to Mass from church. In whatever I wore to work, which for a while was a dirty set of cargo pants and a polo. (I’ve also spent a lot of time sipping on a thermos of water in Mass lately.)

I also have to admit, some of the beginning handwringing put me off. I haven’t seen a noticeable difference in workplace results depending on the dress code, whether it was a professional dress code or simply a basic request to cover yourself. Many of my generation see more casual attire as a mercy towards the budget and towards storage space - it doesn’t involve spending a lot of money on a nice outfit that’s a pain to care for. Honestly the only thing I really agree with was men no longer give up seats for ladies - although I was taught to give up my seat to anyone who needed one (and got some surprise for offering mine once to a gentleman carrying an infant).

I think your latter links are better though. Dress reverently according to what you have, participate in Mass as much as you can.


#11

It seems you are just focused on the clothing. That issue has been hashed to death on CAF. This is about how to train children to behave during Mass.


#12

His points are good, except for, this ridiculous divide between “wear what is appropriate” and “must try to wear your absolute best”. The rest of his points I can agree to.

In all honesty, my “absolute best” has not been in my reach to do for most of my life. As a female my “best” clothes were dresses…and I HATE dresses. The last time I wore one was my wedding and that’s because my Mom and my Mother in Law about forced me. Once I went to college, I was in a situation where I was forced to manage an absolutely insane schedule. I was adopted, so I had no college savings plan from my parents (and because I was adopted was eligible for almost no scholarships–like 1st gen in college–that I would have been). I was balancing 2-3 jobs and my classes as well as “mandatory” volunteer hours and clubs. If I didn’t show up in my grubby cafeteria uniform, I would not have made it to Mass.

And today. I’ve been pregnant or nursing or toddler wrangling. I wear what is best for my state of life. If I needed to go to a wedding? Well, to be honest, if there was no appropriate sitter I would NOT be able to attend. Do remember, that “care of infants” was once taken a bit more seriously than it is today. I was AT Mass with a 2 week old. It was EXPECTED that I be up and about and attending Mass. Today having a baby is no excuse for not going out. Several older adults who had babies pre VII told me that in their day no one brought infants younger than 6 months. I could not immagine not going to Mass for 6 months—especally in the days when children were hardly 2 years apart!!!


#13

A large amount of the articles linked were actually about clothing.


#14

Sorry about that. I thought they’d have more Mass etiquette.


#15

Before she combined the OP with the other links, it was about children in Mass.


#16

Only three of the articles were even read. The first one is a little over the top but the blogger mommy of three was more about bring little ones to Mass and teaching them to behave.


#17

Intrigued by this post. I actually am in RCIA. Sometimes I have to pee. I’ve had incontinence and bladder issues the past year, is it really wrong to go pee during Mass?


#18

NO you can go when you need to go it’s about those who don’t have issues leaving for no important reason.


#19

Thank you :slight_smile: I’ve been wandering about this


#20

I think the truth is that most laity should not pay much attention to what’s going on beside them. You never know what’s going on. I know parents on this forum have talked about dealing with special needs children who don’t act in age-appropriate ways. Or people like I was who show up in messy work clothes after a night shift. Or people who need to get up a lot because of illness.

I don’t think it adds much to anyone’s spirituality to overfocus on one’s neighbor.


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