Mass Confusion

What am I to do when all I want to do is live for God and be as good as Catholic as I can be, yet when I go to Mass I get so irritated at the stuff going on. It seems the people there either are ignorant of what they are doing or just don’t care. I try not to find something wrong with everything but its hard to do!

(1) During the Lords prayer people nearly get knocked out because people with their arms spread out and their hands in your face.

(2) When the priest says “The Lord be with you”…watch out for the people behind you shoving you forward with their arms “and also with you”…

(3) When the deacon reads the gospel, “The Lord be with you”…everyone shoving their arms toward him “and also with you” … sigh

(4) Priest wearing his stole on the outside of his alb…no chasuble at all…

(5) During the prayers over the gifts…“Blessed are you Lord God of all creation, through your goodness we have this bread and wine to offer…” Not single, but both at same time.

I wanted to be a Catholic because I was always so interested in their oneness and their loyalty to the truth. What is going on!?!? Does anyone care anymore? I know we are not going to church because of the people or the priest or whoever, but its hard to try and go and worship God with all the illicit stuff going on around me.

Advice on what I should do to change my thinking? Should I just ignore everyone else, even with their arms spread wide in my face, and the hand holding, etc.

I know this topic has been worn out, but I get so disgusted with seeing all these supposed loyal people doing this irritating stuff. :mad:

Sometimes you just got to find a Mass, to attend at least once a month, that helps you overlook some of these things.

And that’s probably all I need to say. :thumbsup:

Actually, so that I can properly concentrate on the Mass, I tend to either have my eyes closed or lowered.

Maybe you could use that as a strategy to help you avoid other people offending you while you concentrate on, you know, the important part, where Jesus allowed himself to be put to death for our salvation?

You could always do what I do when I don’t want to be so distracted by the behavior and posturings of others–sit way up front, off to the side somewhere where you won’t be crowded, and establish your own space.

This is the way I do it.
If I don’t do it this way, I get frustrated :mad:

Find a Church where all this things are considered abuse. There are such churches even in the suburbs.

I hear the early Sunday Masses are less crowded as well. I feel the need to follow the priest’s actions all the time and that’s difficult to do when you have all this disturbance and taller people around you. After all, the priest’s rubrics are prayers in themselves and I’d like to be a part of those too.

We don’t do any of those things in my Parish. I suggest you shop for a new Parish. If these things truly upset you or distract you from the real reason you are at Mass in the first place, then this is simply not the parish for you. There is no rule that says you have to remain there. Likewise there is no rule requiring you to break up with your Parish. Simply find a new parish, attend Mass several times and if it fits your needs more so then your current parish, fill out a registration form.

These are some very good ideas. I have closed my eyes before and looked down to avoid all the distractions, but I have not however sat up front so I didn’t have to look at it…I will give it a try.

The idea of looking for a different parish is not really possible…I have one parish that is 16 miles from here and one other that is 19 miles from here. All the others are over 40 miles away.


During the confeitor does anyone strike their breasts anymore when we say “through my own fault”…the missal says “strike your breast”

I asked my RCIA instructor and she said “We don’t do this anymore.” One little thing that I wish people who are so quick to want to hold hands and raise hands to the orans position would do is strike their breast…


Give it a break, LOL!
Just ‘ignoring it’ doesn’t stop these things from happening. Yes, you shouldn’t be having a cry over it, but saying that you shouldn’t care is just silly. That’s how abuses come about, because people were too busy ‘concentrating on prayer’ to give a toss.

Yes, I do.

I wonder: who is the “we” who don’t do it anymore, and why don’t “we” do it?

I do.

I’m not apologizing for certain behaviors or everyone we encounter at Mass, however…

Just because some people do things that are different than the GIRM or commit certain abuses, doesn’i mean that they are intentionally being irreverent or don’t have a love and reverence for God.

Believe me, I can relate where you are coming from, but we have to remember why we are there and not judge other’s motives. I just try to remember the narrative from Mark 6:34,
When he disembarked and saw the vast crowd, his heart was moved with pity for them, for they were like sheep without a shepherd;

I’m sure they weren’t the most refined crowd but clearly Jesus was moved with pity for them. He also prayed during his crucifiction for God to forgive those who were mocking him, * for they know not what they do.*

Again, I’m not giving license for anyone to behave improperly in Mass, but unless I know what is in someone’s heart, I’ll defer to God to judge them.

If that doesn’t work, the I agree that you should sit up at the front, then you won’t see what’s going on behind you.

God Bless


I would say the best thing is to not sweat the small stuff. Have you actually ever been knocked down during the Our Father or any of the responses?

I avoid our 11 a.m. Mass because the music is too loud (we have band with an electric bass and drums - something I hate, and it hurts my ears). Other than that, I see no problem with people worshiping in a manner that makes the Mass more enjoyable for them.

What you should be asking yourself is how you can become more actively involved in the Mass, or how you can obtain that connection with God that these other people are probably more successfully achieving.

It sounds to me like you need to spend some time in prayer and ask God what truly matters during Mass. The answer will have nothing to do with what other people are doing.

Don’t lose sight of why you are really there. How people celebrate the Eucharist is not what’s important. The fact that they are all there as a community is.

The worst thing that I observe in Mass lately are all of the empty seats. I wish that there were people knocking themselves over. I guess that it’s all on how we view things… teachccd

To be honest, I spend quite a bit of time in prayer and I most certainly know and understand what is important and matters during the Mass.

I love God with all of my heart, and it just saddens me when folks are doing illicit things during Mass. So much for the Church is one…75% holding hands and 25% trying their best to keep their neighbor from grabbing their hand.

It’s silly to say we shouldn’t be concerned with the way people are acting around us. This is why the GIRM and Canon Law are written so people will obey them, not do whatever they want…might as well be a protestant if that is the case.

No, I have never been knocked down. :stuck_out_tongue:

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