Masturbation & Habitual Sin (First Thread)


#1

Greetings. I'm new to the Forums, and I would like to start off my stay here with a question that's been bothering me recently.

  I am a victim of masturbation (unfortunately), and I've been dealing with it for the past 2 months or so. I can't put into words how much I despise it, yet I continue to partake in it. When I first started doing it, I didn't realize it was a mortal sin, which led me to do it more. Finally though, I discovered the truth about it and ever since then I've been trying to kick the habit. I've been able to break it down to doing it once a week. Every time I masturbate I despise it more and more. I go to weekly Mass, I attend regular Sunday Mass, and I frequently go to Confession. These three factors (plus prayer) have really helped me with my struggle. 

 Up until now, I was doing well with my struggle. I was feeling confident in the fact that I hadn't done it in a while when I finally fell. Oh, how I despise masturbation! Now I feel grieved at the fact the I'm in danger of losing eternal life with Christ. 

 I'm homeschooled, which means that school hours are extremely flexible. Because of that fact, I've been going to daily Mass, as I stated before. I'm going soon, but I'm afraid that I will not be able to receive the Eucharist because of my sin. 

 I recently learned about habitual sin, which has the power to lessen the gravity of a sin.  In my case, I believe it can change the sin from mortal to venial. I've been masturbating weekly, which (I think) meets the requirements for habitual sin to take place.

 So finally, my question is: *Does habitual sin affect my circumstance?*

 Please correct my thoughts on habitual sin if I'm wrong about it and let me know if I have any more misunderstandings concerning masturbation, mortal & venial sin, etc. 


                                                                                                       Thank you

#2

I think you need to look at the circumstances of your sin in this case. To claim habitual sin is really more than just frequency of it being committed.

  1. What causes the sin
  2. What circumstances are you always found in
  3. What things have you done to curb the tendency (can you/did you block internet/tv or get rid of it all together, do you have any thing in the house that temps you ....have you gotten rid of it ? etc etc) . Going to mass and confession is awsome and powerful.....but what are you doing to protect yourself. 4.......the reason why this sin does not USUALLY fall under just "habitual" ....is because it's a sin that generally first begins at the level of thought..... when the first thoughts come to mind are you combating them or playing with them a little.

I understand where you are. What you've described is what sin generally does....first it's a nice relationship....it does for you what you want......then you realize it becomes abusive, and then you realize you are enslaved! And then the devil (who is known as the accuser) .....TURNS ON YOU , points his finger and declares how horrible of a person you are! And uses all this as a wedge between you , God, and holiness.

God loves you and blesses you in your attempts and wants to help you redeem, grow and become victorious! Just realize....it's not going to be your victory....it will be His because without Him..."you can do nothing".

I'm going to post an old post of mine on this sin.

God bless


#3

It’s a very common sin …any priest will tell you.

Our society is so highly sexed and offers us ways to tap into lust on tv, movies, internet, our phones secretly and has become a breeding ground perfect for someone to fall into these types of sins and persist in them until they become habit forming and leaving the victim wondering “what the heck happend! I’m in chains!”

Know its a very common sin…and a very EASY sin to fall into slavery for because it’s so connected with our physical bodies workings.

You fall into it over and over because a few reasons:

  1. It may take some time…but if you are serious, you should see the time range between sins getting farther apart.

2.you have not made a sincere act of willing to change your life…meaning u are willing to maintain some changes:

a, staying away from pornographic sources ( you know where they are ! …if that means putting content blockers on tv or internet…or even being willing to get rid of them altogether…then that’s what it will take or you should not be willing to go to confession until you are willing to do so.

  1. You are probably supressing your pent up energy and feelings and desires and not redeeming them. You need to understand why your body acts the way it does. I suggest looking into “Theology of the body” …there is a reason God made us the way He did and why we have the desires we do! The devil has twisted a beautiful thing within you! Here’s the good news…if you permit God to untwist it…you can focus and direct this great power within you and your spirituality will soar! You will have an amazing spiritual growth spurt fighting and overcoming this!

christopherwest.com/

Christopher west teaches about theology of the body…HES AWSOME! This website has LOADS of info on it. There is a 20$ DVD called “winning the battle for sexual purity” BUY IT! I’ve also found a 10 CD set breaking down the popes teaching on theology of the body for like 3$…it’s amazing… if its something that interests you…I suggest finding it.

Some suggestions:

a GOOD confession…one at which you are willing to rework your entire life. When you get home…you get rid of everything that tempts you (because this sin begins at the level of thought).

This is going to sound silly …but trust me. How you live your daily life needs to change: If you have a messy room/ home…clean and organize it, start keeping track of appointments on a planner, plan out your day and plan a day in which you can keep busy (lazy, sloppy and unorganized life sets u up to fall especially when you have lots of time on your hands ) .

Exercise! believe it or not…exercise burns off lots of our pent up energies

Lastly…start to practice fasting. If you can begin to permit your will to tell the body what to do…your will will get stronger and your body will listen to you more.

If you can start studying theology of the body so you understand why we have the urges and what they mean…the untwisting can begin (along with the sacraments and DAILY praying about this) and use my above suggestions… I can gurantee results.

Remember this is going to be a process…AND it’s a process that will allow you to come closer to God through all of it. Every day at the begining of your day say a little prayer asking God to give you strength and to conqure your temptations and to not treat his daughters in such a demeaning way and to help purify your heart. And thank him every night and rededicate your entire body , and feelings, thoughts to His service.

Oh, also…when temptations come… try saying a prayer like this: "Lord I offer this temptation to you and I’m willing to suffer it in atonement for my sins and for the conversion of all my brothers and sister caught in this trap of slavery "

lol, its spiritual jujitsu…you’re taking the devils temptation and causing him to lose souls!

Good luck to you . If you need to talk…don’t hesitate!


#4

Oh you really want to go all out to stop this early.

I didnt know that masturbation was a sin when i started, and did it for years before i found out. roll on 10 years and i'm struggling to stop. So if you can manage to stop now, you'll avoid an even harder battle later on.

May God strengthen you in your struggles.


#5

First off, congratulations on realizing the severity of this problem early on. I didn’t till a little later in life, and the longer you’re at it, the harder it is to stop. I am about where you are as well, I can go for about a week, then I just can’t help it.

The habitual nature of a sin also has to do with how long / frequently you engaged in the act. I can’t speak to your circumstances specifically, you should ask your priest about it. As to it lessening the sin, the Church does teach that habitual addictions can be lessened to venial sins, but it’s on a case by case basis, and should be discussed with your confessor.

As to beating the sin, It’s nice to hear that you are able to attend daily mass, I wish I had that capacity, but I sadly do not. You should also take up saying the Rosary daily, it has been invaluable to my struggle.

I wish you the best of luck and success!

God Bless


#6

Here are a few choice remarks of St. Alphonsus Ligouri, who wrote Visitations to the Blessed
Sacrament and to the Virgin Mary, and The Great Means of Salvation and of Perfection.

"...let us not go to him for little and valueless things, but let us ask some GREAT thing of
him: You seek from the Almighty -- seek something GREAT. If a man went to a king to ask some trumpery coin, like a farthing, I think, that man would but insult his king. On the other
hand, we honor God, we honor his mercy, and his liberality, when, though we see how
miserable we are, and how unworthy of any kindness, we yet ask for GREAT GRACES, TRUSTING in the goodness of God, and in his faithfulness to his promises of granting to the man who prays WHATEVER GRACE he asks: Whatsoever you will, ask, and it shall be done unto you (Jn 15,7)."

"... But God, when he is asked, gives his good things "ABUNDANTLY," that is, with a generous hand, always GIVING MORE than is asked, because his wealth is infinite, and the more he gives the more he has to give: For you, O Lord, are sweet and mild; and plenteous in mercy to all that call upon you (Ps.,85,5). You, O my God, said David, are but too liberal and
kind to him that invokes you; the mercies which you pour upon him are SUPERABUNDANT, above all he asks."

"... On this point, then, we have to fix all our attention, namely, to pray with CONFIDENCE,
feeling sure that by prayer all the treasures of heaven are thrown open to us."


#7

Now here are almost this exact understanding of GREAT and ABUNDANT graces which Mary describes in her Miraculous Medal.

Here is some important info about the Miraculous Medal, one of Mother Teresa's
favorites, which is the application of St. Alphonsus' words.

The mother of Jesus spoke to sister Catherine Laboure in 1830 with these words:
"Have a medal struck... All who wear it will receive GREAT graces; they should wear it
around the neck. GRACES will ABOUND for persons who wear it with CONFIDENCE."

           Later Mary said, “... it must be given to the whole world and to every person.” 

During this apparition, Mary's hands had 3 rings on each finger. Each ring gave off
rays of colored light. A few rings did not. Mary said that the lights radiating from
the rings are graces that people ASK for. The rings that didn't radiate she said
were graces not given because they were NOT asked for.

Have it blessed. Wear the medal in her honor at all times. When needed say,
"Mary, thank you for your gift to me, please help me now with those great graces you promised to obtain for those who ask."
She promised and she is immaculate so she will keep her words, "GRACES will ABOUND for persons who wear it with CONFIDENCE."

"The devotions we practice in honor of the glorious Virgin Mary, however trifling they be,
are very pleasing to her divine Son, ...." St. Teresa of Jesus

The medal is called Miraculous, and the picture on it is "Our Lady of Grace".

"Great graces are often attached to what seems trifling." St. Margaret Mary Alacoque

[legionofmary.org/MiracMedal.html](http://www.legionofmary.org/MiracMedal.html)

#8

Get your folks to install an Internet filter. Check out www.filterreview.org to find the right one...you will still likely masturbate but not so compulsively without the pornography.


#9

Hey,

I'm doing my best to stop my addiction to masturbation. So far i've gone 5 days (getting past 3 is usually a big challenge).

I'm finding however that i'm constantly leaking a lot of seamen type fluids down there and i constantly have an erection. My penis also seems REDICULOUSLY sensitive. I dont wear tihht clothes or underwear but even the rubbing of my trousers against my penis when walking is stimulating me.

I honestly dont want to fall back into sin, and i've been trying hard and saying prayers etc.

As embarrassing as it is, i'm terrified of ejaculating when just walking around town or in uni. Because it's unlikely that i will be able to hide the pleasure after abstaining for a while and because i'm afraid of my clothes being soaked with sperm.

Please, please do you have any suggestions to help me continue??

I'd thought of maybe wearing a condom so that my penis and trousers wouldnt rub as much....especially one of those ones that's advertised to de-sensitise the penis. While i'm against contraception, i know that the catholic church isnt against the use of condoms in all cases. I am a virgin and will not be having sex (i believe in nfp after marriage)...also i'd be using it to help me stop a habitual sin. I'm not trying to seek my own pleasure either. I'm just trying to preserve my human dignity as i go about trying to break my sinful habit...as at least my clothes would not need changed if i had an accident. is this a good idea???

Thanks in advance for your help. I'm really embarrassed, but i want to stop my sinful habits.


#10

CHAPTER 13 – On Resisting Temptations [The Imitation of Christ]

So long as we live in this world, we cannot remain without trial and temptation: as Job says, “Man’s life on earth is a warfare.” We must therefore be on guard against temptations, and watchful in prayer, that the Devil find no means of deceiving us; for he never rests, but prowls around seeking whom he may devour. No one is so perfect and holy that he is never tempted, and we can never be secure from temptation.

Although temptations are so troublesome and grievous, yet they are often profitable to us, for by them we are humbled, cleansed, and instructed. All the Saints endured many trials and temptations, and profited by them; but those who could not resist temptations became reprobate, and fell away. There is no Order so holy, nor place so secluded, where there are no troubles and temptations.

No man can be entirely free from temptation so long as he lives; for the source of temptation lies within our own nature, since we are born with an inclination towards evil. When one temptation or trial draws to a close, another takes its place; and we shall always have something to fight, for man has lost the blessing of original happiness. Many try to escape temptations, only to encounter them more fiercely, for no one can win victory by flight alone; it is only by patience and true humility that we can grow stronger than all our foes.

The man who only avoids the outward occasions of evil, but fails to uproot it in himself, will gain little advantage. Indeed, temptations will return upon him the sooner, and he will find himself in a worse state than before. Little by little and by patient endurance you will overcome them by God’s help, better than by your own violence and importunity. Seek regular advice in temptation, and never deal harshly with those who are tempted, but give them such encouragement as you would value yourself.

The beginning of all evil temptation is an unstable mind and lack of trust in God. Just as a ship without a helm is driven to and fro by the waves, so a careless man, who abandons his proper course, is tempted in countless ways. Fire tempers steel, and temptation the just man. We often do not know what we can bear, but temptation reveals our true nature. We need especially to be on our guard at the very onset of temptation, for then the Enemy may be more easily overcome, if he is not allowed to enter the gates of the mind: he must be repulsed at the threshold, as soon as he knocks. Thus the poet Ovid writes, “Resist at the beginning; the remedy may come too late.” For first there comes into the mind an evil thought: next, a vivid picture: then delight, and urge to evil, and finally consent. In this way the Enemy gradually gains complete mastery, when he is not resisted at first. And the longer a slothful man delays resistance, the weaker he becomes, and the stronger his enemy grows against him.

Some people undergo their heaviest temptations at the beginning of their conversion; some towards the end of their course; others are greatly troubled all their lives; while there are some whose temptations are but light. This is in accordance with the wisdom and justice of God’s ordinance, who weighs the condition and merits of every man, and disposes all things for the salvation of those whom He chooses.

We must not despair, therefore, when we are tempted, but earnestly pray God to grant us his help in every need. For, as Saint Paul says, “With the temptation, God will provide a way to overcome it, that we may be able to bear bear it.” So, let us humble ourselves under the hand of God, in every trial and trouble, for He will save and raise up the humble in Spirit. In all these trials, our progress is tested; in them great merit may be secured, and our virtue become evident. It is no great matter if we are devout and fervent when we have no troubles; but if we show patience in adversity, we can make great progress in virtue. Some are spared severe temptations, but are overcome in the lesser ones of every day, in order that they may be humble, and learn not to trust in themselves, but to recognize their frailty.


#11

It is universal that once a person starts masturbation that it is very hard to stop. Hatred for it among these persons is very common. Pray, go to confession, remove the occasions that lead you into the sin, and ask the Blessed Mother to help you.


#12

Masturbation I guess isn't accepted in Catholicism, however, if you're simply masturbating to reduce stress/fall asleep, that's really not that bad. just don't look at porn. Masturbating is cheap, and better to reduce stress than something self destructive/will make you fat like overeating or drinking booze.


#13

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