Masturbation


#1

I’m not sure if this is posted in the right sections of these forums but, I’m a 19 year old male. I started masturbating when I sort of fell away from the church in High School. I came back to the church and to God about a year and a half ago and have been struggling for the same amount of time to quit masturbating. I can’t seem to ever quit though I guess I’m just addicted to this sin. The longest I’ve went is like 2 months and in the end something happens and I wind up doing it. I know that its a sin and I know that pornography is a sin. I’ve been to confession multiple times and have confessed those sins and I try to stay busy and read the Bible and pray but I just can’t seem to stop doing it. I really do want to quit but I always have the thought that like I know that I’m not going to be able to quit so why bother and end up just giving into my temptations. I guess I just need some advice because it seems like no matter how hard I try I always end up going back to it.

thanks


#2

I don’t think it’s wrong in moderation! Excessive porno is a sin (and an exploitation of both men and women nowadays), but wouldn’t you agree that masturbation beats going out and raping someone? :eek:


#3

[quote="Southern_org, post:2, topic:291417"]
I don't think it's wrong in moderation! Excessive porno is a sin (and an exploitation of both men and women nowadays), but wouldn't you agree that masturbation beats going out and raping someone? :eek:

[/quote]

This is so incredibly wrong. So against Church teaching. I am afraid that you are misguided in this, and I caution you on giving others advice when you are uncertain of what the church teaches.

To both of you, there is no such thing as "excessive porno". A little or a lot, both are equally mortally sinful. Further, it is childish to compare Masturbation as an "alternative" to raping someone. Talk about self justification. :)

Friend, in our journey of spiritual growth we rise and we fall. We succeed and we fail. The saints are sinners who fell and fell and fell, but ALWAYS got back up to try again. Have heart, continue confession and receiving the sacraments, and pray pray pray!


#4

[quote="asdfgh, post:1, topic:291417"]
I'm not sure if this is posted in the right sections of these forums but, I'm a 19 year old male. I started masturbating when I sort of fell away from the church in High School. I came back to the church and to God about a year and a half ago and have been struggling for the same amount of time to quit masturbating. I can't seem to ever quit though I guess I'm just addicted to this sin. The longest I've went is like 2 months and in the end something happens and I wind up doing it. I know that its a sin and I know that pornography is a sin. I've been to confession multiple times and have confessed those sins and I try to stay busy and read the Bible and pray but I just can't seem to stop doing it. I really do want to quit but I always have the thought that like I know that I'm not going to be able to quit so why bother and end up just giving into my temptations. I guess I just need some advice because it seems like no matter how hard I try I always end up going back to it.

thanks

[/quote]

Pal... I think this problem is a problem every teenage guy (including myself) and probably most girls have around this age. What I always did was just find an activity that interests me (such as drawing, fishing, hanging out with friends, going to the movies, etc) to keep me busy. The longer you go without doing it, the easier it gets.

God Bless:thumbsup:


#5

[quote="Ophelia23, post:3, topic:291417"]
This is so incredibly wrong. So against Church teaching. I am afraid that you are misguided in this, and I caution you on giving others advice when you are uncertain of what the church teaches.

To both of you, there is no such thing as "excessive porno". A little or a lot, both are equally mortally sinful. Further, it is childish to compare Masturbation as an "alternative" to raping someone. Talk about self justification. :)

Friend, in our journey of spiritual growth we rise and we fall. We succeed and we fail. The saints are sinners who fell and fell and fell, but ALWAYS got back up to try again. Have heart, continue confession and receiving the sacraments, and pray pray pray!

[/quote]

I agree with you Opelia
Porn is morally wrong in any amount... Seek spiritual advice if in doubt about anything like this... also... Go to Confession... that is what it is there for... Its a gift ... a gift of the Mercy of God... and pray about this Like Ophelia said... its not about the falling... its about the rising and getting back up again... Sin will pull you down... but thanks to the Sacrament of Confession you can and will rise above it.


#6

And shooting someone in the leg is better than shooting them in the head, but it's still wrong.


#7

You should try to eliminate any types of things that enable your "habit". I have struggled with this my whole life & it is likely my primary sin tendancy. This activity is very self centered and can eventually make you quite selfish. My best weapons against this, after prayer & reconcilliation, are using my time that I used to use for my "habit" for trying to serve others. This helps me to focus outward instead of inward.
Keep up the good fight, Jesus & the Communion of Saints are there to help you.


#8

CHAPTER 13 – On Resisting Temptations [The Imitation of Christ]

So long as we live in this world, we cannot remain without trial and temptation: as Job says, “Man’s life on earth is a warfare.” We must therefore be on guard against temptations, and watchful in prayer, that the Devil find no means of deceiving us; for he never rests, but prowls around seeking whom he may devour. No one is so perfect and holy that he is never tempted, and we can never be secure from temptation.

Although temptations are so troublesome and grievous, yet they are often profitable to us, for by them we are humbled, cleansed, and instructed. All the Saints endured manly trials and temptations, and profited by them; but those who could not resist temptations became reprobate, and fell away. There is no Order so holy, nor place so secluded, where there are no troubles and temptations.

No man can be entirely free from temptation so long as he lives; for the source of temptation lies within our own nature, since we are born with an inclination towards evil. When one temptation or trial draws to a close, another takes its place; and we shall always have something to fight, for man has lost the blessing of original happiness. Many try to escape temptations, only to encounter them more fiercely, for no one can win victory by flight alone; it is only by patience and true humility that we can grow stronger than all our foes.

The man who only avoids the outward occasions of evil, but fails to uproot it in himself, will gain little advantage. Indeed, temptations will return upon him the sooner, and he will find himself in a worse state than before. Little by little and by patient endurance you will overcome them by God’s help, better than by your own violence and importunity. Seek regular advice in temptation, and never deal harshly with those who are tempted, but give them such encouragement as you would value yourself.

The beginning of all evil temptation is an unstable mind and lack of trust in God. Just as a ship without a helm is driven to and fro by the waves, so a careless man, who abandons his proper course, is tempted in countless ways. Fire tempers steel, and temptation the just man. We often do not know what we can bear, but temptation reveals our true nature. We need especially to be on our guard at the very onset of temptation, for then the Enemy may be more easily overcome, if he is not allowed to enter the gates of the mind: he must be repulsed at the threshold, as soon as he knocks. Thus the poet Ovid writes, “Resist at the beginning; the remedy may come too late.” For first there comes into the mind an evil thought: next, a vivid picture: then delight, and urge to evil, and finally consent. In this way the Enemy gradually gains complete mastery, when he is not resisted at first. And the longer a slothful man delays resistance, the weaker he becomes, and the stronger his enemy grows against him.

Some people undergo their heaviest temptations at the beginning of their conversion; some towards the end of their course; others are greatly troubled all their lives; while there are some whose temptations are but light. This is in accordance with the wisdom and justice of God’s ordinance, who weighs the condition and merits of every man, and disposes all things for the salvation of those whom He chooses.

We must not despair, therefore, when we are tempted, but earnestly pray God to grant us his help in every need. For, as Saint Paul says, “With the temptation, God will provide a way to overcome it, that we may be able to bear bear it.” So, let us humble ourselves under the hand of God, in every trial and trouble, for He will save and raise up the humble in Spirit. In all these trials, our progress is tested; in them great merit may be secured, and our virtue become evident. It is no great matter if we are devout and fervent when we have no troubles; but if we show patience in adversity, we can make great progress in virtue. Some are spared severe temptations, but are overcome in the lesser ones of every day, in order that they may be humble, and learn not to trust in themselves, but to recognize their frailty.


#9

Some advice that might help:

Find out what leads you to this sin. Does having a computer in your room cause problems? Do you feel most tempted when playing video games or watching TV? If so, as much as possible, get rid of the computer and avoid the TV.

Your not going to get over this overnight. You are going to struggle. But you should realize that if you are always saying, “I’ll overcome this next time”, you will say that until you die. You have to say “no” now.

You may consider fasting. Whether from food or from luxuries. I find that doing so trains my will while I am strong so that when I am tempted I have the strength and experience to say no.

Peace be with you! And don’t forget that it is God who is the source of Grace, not our own wills.


#10

The Holy Rosary is always an excellent way to overcome sins of the flesh. Mary is our loving mother who will always look after us. And frequent reception of Holy Communion (of course after Confession).


#11

I heard a priest once preach "The sin of Judas was the sin of giving up". Don't be Judas! No matter how many times you fall, do not give up!

I suffer from the same problem, and I have often "dealt" with it by being apathetic. Apathy does not work, because it makes you repeat the sin without taking into consideration how it affects your relationship with Your Creator, and then you start to tell yourself that minor forms of sexual stimulation with a partner are okay as well. Do you see? It will lead to further sin, even if it seems like a very small sin now.

I will pray for you, and please, pray for me too!


#12

[quote="Southern_org, post:2, topic:291417"]
I don't think it's wrong in moderation! Excessive porno is a sin (and an exploitation of both men and women nowadays), but wouldn't you agree that masturbation beats going out and raping someone? :eek:

[/quote]

What in the world?!! :eek: First of all, you're wrong here ... it is a sin whether it is once or a hundred times. The Church teaches this. Second... did you really just say it would be better than going out and raping someone? Totally inappropriate. :(


#13

[quote="Southern_org, post:2, topic:291417"]
I don't think it's wrong in moderation! Excessive porno is a sin (and an exploitation of both men and women nowadays), but wouldn't you agree that masturbation beats going out and raping someone? :eek:

[/quote]

The Catechism of the Catholic Church says:

**2352 By masturbation is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. "Both the Magisterium of the Church, in the course of a constant tradition, and the moral sense of the faithful have been in no doubt and have firmly maintained that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action."138 "The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose." For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of "the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved."139

2354 Pornography consists in removing real or simulated sexual acts from the intimacy of the partners, in order to display them deliberately to third parties. It offends against chastity because it perverts the conjugal act, the intimate giving of spouses to each other. It does grave injury to the dignity of its participants (actors, vendors, the public), since each one becomes an object of base pleasure and illicit profit for others. It immerses all who are involved in the illusion of a fantasy world. It is a grave offense. Civil authorities should prevent the production and distribution of pornographic materials.

2396 Among the sins gravely contrary to chastity are masturbation, fornication, pornography, and homosexual practices.**


#14

I appreciate all the responses and advice. Is it ok to receive the Holy Eucharist on Church before confessing the sins of masturbation and pornography to a priest? I mean I do plan on confessing these sins obviously and can do so before receiving Eucharist this Sunday. But I'm just curious as to if this is a sin that needs to be confessed all the time before receiving the Eucharist.


#15

Confession first, then reception of the Eucharist.
Catholics must not recieve the Eucharist if they have mortal sins unconfessed.
To recieve the Eucharist while NOT in a state of grace is itself committing another mortal sin called “sacrilege”.


#16

Sorry but as my screen name declares I have been out of the loop for some time. So *masturbation *is considered a mortal sin…just like murder!? Peace.


#17

Yes; in some instances it may be considered a venial sin.

There are enough discussions on this website that go into the theology as to masturbation being a sin, so I will not add to it here. It is easy enough to scroll up to the top of the web page and enter some keywords into the search box and find the answers that have already been well researched and posted previously.


#18

The Apostle James says, "Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners and purify your hearts, ye double minded. Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep; let your laughter be turned into mourning, and your joy into sorrow. **Be humbled **in the sight of the Lord, and he will exalt you." (Jas 4:8-10)

Humility. This is the most important virtue in these verses. It gives the most impact to the result. But it demands a battle!

"Wherein you shall greatly rejoice, if now you must be for a little time made sorrowful in divers temptations: that the trial of your faith (much more precious than gold which is tried by the fire) may be found unto praise and glory and honour at the appearing of Jesus Christ." (1 Pet 1:6, 7)

You have to see at some point in the future that masturbation is not worth the pleasure. You can only know this by its bitter fruit of addition. Also, humility sets in when after you struggle you say I cannot go into life alone in my body, rather then accumulate life moments at this hard stuggle without recourse to His Spirit, you choose God on his terms or his revelation of himself (the Sacred Scripture, Sacred Tradition or the testimony of the Church Fathers, and the teachings of the Bishop of Rome). This is a hard struggle, a life long study of Divine Revelation maintained in the Catholic Church since Jesus revealed himself, let his revelation in so that he can exult you, and God will not expect anything less for his glory. But his Mercy encourages you to cleanse your hands. So think on that.

Or else, "Farewell, my throne, envied and perilous height; farewell assembly of high priests, honoured by the age and dignity of its priests, and all ye ministers of God around the holy table, drawing near to the God who draws near to you." (S. Gregory Nazianzen, Oration 42, n. 26)


#19

[quote="Rob_has_lapsed, post:16, topic:291417"]
Sorry but as my screen name declares I have been out of the loop for some time. So masturbation *is considered a mortal sin...just like *murder!? Peace.

[/quote]

Masturbation and murder are both grave matter. There are three factors which determine whether or not an act is mortally sinful. Being grave matter is one of them.


#20

My advice to anyone who is struggling with overcoming the sin of masturbation is to confess it often, receive the sacraments frequently, pray, and eventually you will see this sin the way that God sees it.


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