Men, Children and Humor


#1

I was verbally abused by my mom. So, when I first married my husband, I was taken aback by his sarcastic sense of humor. He used to have me in tears until we got more accustomed to one another. Over the years I have grown to like his strange, sarcastic humor and he is much more sensitive to my feelings.

One thing that befuddles me is his sense of humor with our kids. Do men just joke with children differently then moms?

He and our children, especially the boys, tease each other in ways that to me seem mean but they always end up laughing at one another.

For example, we stopped at the store to pick something up on our way to take our eldest son to work. He began to urge his dad to hurry even though we had plenty of time. So, my husband began to deliberately walk and talk in extreme slow motion.

My oldest son told his father that he was not going to put him in a nursing home when his father became senile. Instead he was going to allow his father to live with him so that he could enjoy torturing him in the same way that he was being aggravated.

My husband and son both began to laugh!! I would have been horrified if my son had said that to me. Later in the car, they continued teasing each other and laughing at each joke that they made.

I know that my boys respect their father deeply. They obey him much quicker then they do me. My oldest son even wrote his essay to get into Art School on how positive his father’s influence was on him.

Yet they sound so mean when they tease one another!

Is this just an example of male humor verses female humor?:shrug:

By the way, my son got to work half an hour early and had to wait outside just like his father told him would happen. :stuck_out_tongue:


#2

I think men do this more often, but there are women who do it too. :slight_smile: Part of what makes it funny to the people involved is that each knows the other doesn’t mean a word of it.

It’s probably a good life lesson–learning not to take oneself too seriously. :slight_smile:


#3

Being married to my husband means that I have learned to joke much more often. :slight_smile: I still sometimes am befuddled over the humor of the males in my house though.:stuck_out_tongue:

By the way, I think that my 11 year old daughter might be acquiring her father’s sense of humor as well. She has begun to joke with him too, although she is somewhat more gentle in her humor then her brothers.


#4

WHen someone asks me to do something, I ususally respond, “Never!!!” then go do it…


#5

Woman here, and my DH and I , as well as he and his mom, and my mom and I, kid around like this all the time. Worse, too!

But we all know it’s in good fun, and have the best times with it. Makin’ great memories, we’ll never forget.


#6

Yes, men have a totally different sense of humor. My husband and sons taunt each other about who is strongest or better built. That’s just the way they are. And they’ll put each other down in obnoxious ways.
My daughter and I are completely different. We encourage people with gentle words and actions. But my DH will tell the boys to “suck it up” when they complain. I don’t know why men are like that but they are.
“Pain is weakness leaving the body” exact quote from one of my sons after he smacked his younger brother.


#7

:stuck_out_tongue:


#8

It’s how we interact I guess. It’s how my father played with me, and how I play with boys. To be honest, I think the best way to tell if I don’t like a kid is if he doesn’t a new bruise or two (and if I don’t have about 50 :blush: ). We like being rough, physically and verbally. Blame it on our fathers, most of us wouldn’t really have it any other way either. :thumbsup:


#9

Yeah there are times when I tell my hubby to knock it off because I think he’s being mean. My daughter goes “Mom, he was just teasing me.”:shrug: She actually likes it even when she acts mad about it because when he says “Ok, ok.” and stops because I’m giving him the evil eye she like “Aw come on dad.” I don’t get it either. :rolleyes:

We don’t have boys so I can only imagine how much worse (physical) it would be if that was the case. :eek: Eek!


#10

Yep, seems normal to me. My DH is really dry with the kids. For instance I mentioned the two year old fell out of bed “did you hear the thump? Man it sounded like she went through the floor, poor baby!” We are all driving somewhere and the two year old is FINE, probably does not even recall her midnight tumble…and my 8yo DD asks “Oh no is she ok?”

DH: “No.” No emphasis, no exaggerration, just a “no.”

:rotfl:

That’s only one example I can think of but he has a TON of them. These little quips are usually responded to with a “daaaaddddy!”

I’ve only seen one family instance where it was completely out of control. It was with my sister’s kids. The teasing was SO obnoxious from their dad, just a constant, that it wasn’t really funny at all. My sister acclimated to the obnoxious teasing and she was doing it too. To make matters worse – boundaries were not set for the kids, neither was any sense of “respect your elders” so she had these three LITTLE kids running around with the smartest-mouths and crapp-y-attitudes. It was NOT funny. Oh it was annoying. Even when I KNEW why they acted that way I would get TO’d. Complete strangers were subject to it. You see it was DRY and it was shieshty, and it sounded liek the kids were just being disrespectful, not humerous. I nagged my sister about reigning it in a bit, or for goodness’ sake teach your children some MANNERS! The ONLY person they did not treat with blatant disrespect was our dad, or grandpa. They were afraid of the Eagle-Peck (i.e. knuckle in the head) I think.

Now my neices and nephew are in their teens, two of them adults, and only NOW after social pressure and their friends and teacher’s not tolerating it have they toned it down. :shrug:

As long as your children aren’t disrespectful and acting like mini-David-Lettermen’s every where you go, I wouldn’t worry about it. :thumbsup: Let the dad’s have fun! I know my dad still teases me.


#11

Yeah, I’m like this with my dad too. It’s all in good fun! I’m also like this with the guys I’m friends with. Lol, one of them joked that if I gave up talking for two days, it would be a service to the general public!! Of course, I pretended to be offended while another guy said, “Be nice, that’s endearing” and my friend said, “Well, I didn’t know her at first which is why I didn’t tease her, but now I care about her and I wouldn’t tease her if I didn’t care.”

When he started to tease me, he made sure I knew it was because he liked me and just wanted to poke some fun. I’m used to it from my parents as well as my friends back home. Of course, I don’t pull out my dry sense of humor to people I don’t know. I usually wait till I know them pretty well because sometimes it’s just mean. But don’t worry, your family sounds absolutely normal:)


#12

I don’t think it’s just men…
It has more to do with personalities, I think…

I taunt my boys a LOT!.. actually more than DH sometimes. Sometimes DH gets annoyed that I get them too riled up! :rolleyes:

My dad was a total tease… so I learned from him. DH’s dad had an incredible sense of humor, but much more dry… not as much teasing and taunting… just different…

Sometimes I can get a little “female” and get my feelings hurt when DH is teasing… but that isn’t very often…


#13

Just different types of people - not a men/women thing… my family is a big bunch of dry sarcastic humour - my parents and sibs are this way too. DH, DS and I are the same way - as are many many many of our friends.

There was a couple who came into our group of friends, he fit right in but she just did not “get it” - we would be in tears from laughter and she would just looked perplexed. I’ve also met some men with the lack of the satire gene :slight_smile:

The world would be sooooo dull if everyone were the same!!


#14

Deb, that definitely is an example of male vs female humour. We’d never dream to tease ladies the way we tease each other unless we were very close. We tease those lady friends we’re close to; consider highschool friendships, for instance. Perhaps with the kind of soulmate effect you had as your future husband’s fiancee and girlfriend before, that was what happened (supposing he didn’t simply grow up in a male-only environment). Brothers and friends are notorious for that and it also happens between fathers and sons - not all but some. My father would generally stop at calling me an old heretic and I wouldn’t go further than saying he looked like a Foreign Legion chaplain. :smiley:


closed #15

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