Men objectifying women


#1

So from a modesty thread I started it became evident that men not matter how good they might be end up treating women like meat. My question is to both men and women. What do you think is a good way to avoid becoming an object of lust?

Personally I have done this before though I wasn’t aware of it until I thought on it. Yes I confession this to God so it is under Christ blood


#2

This is an interesting question. I think modesty is a value that isn’t popular in today’s culture - as a result, there is a lot of immodesty in thought, word and deed “out there” (in the media, in the entertainment world, and so on.) Such things tend to vitiate the atmosphere that ought to exist between men and women.

As to how to avoid it? Moderation in all things. :slight_smile:


#3

You are absolutely right and maybe moderation is the first step to making things better


#4

Boys these days are bombarded with sex everywhere they look. It becomes ingrained in their mind from a young age to look at women with lust. Sadly, most boys are too immature to realize what’s going on until they become an adult. By then it is very hard to stop themselves from thinking of women as objects. Men must pray and pray and pray for God and the Holy Spirit to heal their mind.

Women can help by dressing and acting modestly. I know a lot of young women just want attention. They want to be loved like all people do, but immodesty attracts the wrong kind of attention. Dressing and acting modestly will attract the guys that truly love the person, not just the looks.

This overall problem is caused by modern society’s obsession with sex. Short of changing society (mostly impossible), more parental control over what their kids are seeing would maybe help. Make sure the kids are grounded in faith I guess. I really don’t know much about parenting. Luckily, I don’t have any kids. I don’t have to worry about this now, maybe someday though.


#5

Women should dress in a manner consistent with their dignity as daughters of God and not to be “sexy”.

Men should control their eyes and, even when a woman is dressed immodestly, avoid objectifying her.

Easier said than done, of course. Men are “hard-wired” to look at and enjoy women and women, in our culture, are bombarded with the idea that they should look “sexy” either to gain the affection of men or to be “liberated”. Difficult, but not impossible. And a whole lot less difficult than dealing with an eternity in Hell.


#6

Maybe, as parents, we need to risk being “unpopular” and turn the TV off, or even cancel our cable bill. We complain that men objectify women, yet when we are raising them, we have the TV on to all kinds of “adult appropriate” programming. Short of making them leave the room, they are going to see whatever TV or movie we are watching.

With women, it can be very difficult to dress modestly even if you want to, unless you know how to sew and can afford the machine, fabric, patterns and have the time to do so. In stores right now it is almost impossible to find a skirt that even comes to the top of a woman’s knees or pants that aren’t skin tight. I’m not advocating wearing those things, I’m just saying that it’s hard to dress modestly when there are no modest clothes available - especially at a modest price point.

I think the first step to breaking the cycle of objectification is to unplug. Then women aren’t bombarded with inappropriate fashion images and men aren’t bombarded with inappropriate images. We’ve made objectifying fashionable and normal.
Kris


#7

OP, I think you made a good point about women being objectified, even by “good guys.”

Personally in my battle with lust and objectification, my view on women has shifted from once seeing them as sexual objects to now almost fearing to go where they will be as they have now become objects of temptation and sin for me.


#8

You can’t.

I mean, you can take preventative measures, but there is no way to ensure that nobody lusts after you. If you want to try, it just depends how far you want to go. You can do anything from being covered between your knees and shoulders to wearing all-but-shapeless sweatshirts and fairly loose pants. :shrug:

The latter is what I wear on a regular basis. At this point it’s not out of any sense of duty, it’s just because I’m rather fond of amorphous sweatshirts. I get less attention than other people, but I’m never going to get none. And obviously I can’t gauge the number of people who have thoughts, but don’t say anything.

Once you’ve done as much as you’re going to do, don’t worry about it. If some guy wants to objectify me in his own mind, that’s his sin and not mine.


#9

Yes think men have a responsibility not to look at women and think of them as sex object also women have a duty not to dress in a way that would earn God’s scorn. We should try to better each other in small ways but we must be carful not to overstep over bounds


#10

It is said that good men and women stumble because of the tempting of others. It would be much better for them to never be tempted then to be tempted and fall. However thank God for Jesus because it is through him that we can overcome lust and be forgiven


#11

Some men are tempted by things that we can’t help. If I run into someone in my amorphous sweatshirt, and he says something rude and inappropriate, then he didn’t sin because I tempted him. He sinned because of his own sinful flesh, coupled with his decision to sin. If it wasn’t me, it would have been someone else.

I’m going to do what I can for my brothers, but I feel no need to eliminate all possible temptation.


#12

I agree with Kamaduck on this one somewhat. You can’t always help it if you come upon a truely lustful man. I do believe as a man that it is difficult growing up in this generation where everywhere you turn there is sex, because men can be aroused more by images then women can this is a major issue. On the otherhand it does not matter what women wear a man can chose to keep his thought to himself as well as fight them when he has them. It can be very difficult sometimes but it is still the lustful that are sinning.


#13

Indeed.

And different men are attracted to different types of women. Some men would look lustfully at a woman in long skirt thinking “I wonder what is under that!”

Women should be modest in thought and be respectful in their dress but not do so to avoid being objectified.

The only women pretty much universally found unappealing in dress are the muslim women who wear those big tent things wit mesh over their face, and God certainly isn’t calling for that.


#14

I actually heard a story about a young Muslim woman in America who gave up wearing hijab after repeatedly being harassed by male peers. Apparently they found her modesty itself “sexy”, and took to giving her graphic descriptions of what they wanted to do with her.

So there’s really only so much you can do sometimes. :shrug:


#15

Take note of this sermon by Pope Francis. How people fall to blaming others for our temptations/sins – as a way for us to “justify/make ourselves feel better”. This blaming of others for our temptations/sins – blocks us from hearing the word of God.

osservatoreromano.va/en/news/resist-temptation#.UwylHoXCsz9


#16

How about gray cubes with two holes in the bottom for legs. Oh wait, then you have the legs showing.

Hmmm. . . . these’s got to be something women can do to stop tempting us men. . . . :shrug:


#17

Phase shifting. We could place women on a different plane of existence, marked only by blue lights in the male dimension. Interaction can take place solely through internet forums. :stuck_out_tongue:

Honestly, I think it’s just a matter of each person doing their best and not worrying about whether other people are, too.


#18

God could grant women the power of invisibility.

Modesty is usually defined as not being noticed, especially on CAF. Now what could be more modest than invisibility.


#19

And now I am sad, because this is a very accurate observation.

I think that is how we know we’ve gone too far- it’s all well and good to say that people shouldn’t flaunt body parts, but when we start to speak of people’s physical existence as though it were a necessary evil, we should notice that something is wrong.


#20

I think your question is nonsense because it assumes the innocence of women. In other words, women want the same thing as men and they play along with the whole thing.


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