might be a little impotent?

ok so i’m 20, and i might be a little impotent…not sure how or if this will effect me ever getting married. anyways, i have several questions.

  1. what is considered impotent for the rules to get married? like can’t at all, or not all the way etc? (btw ever since an injury down there, it’s not as good as used to be, but i still can, just not as good as i used to)

  2. if this doesn’t count, do i even have to tell the Church about this when i’m getting married?

  3. i don’t currently have a gf, but if i do get one, would it be morally wrong to not tell her about this? especially since i’m not even sure if i am impotent etc. Or if i should tell her, when should i tell her? b/c i don’t plan on ‘doing it’ till marriage, so can’t test that way.


If the ability still exists, that is sufficient.

This reminds me of the young girl who considered herself to be “slightly pregnant”…:wink:

Impotence is only an impediment to entering a marriage if it is total, incurable, and irreversible, and of course, existing prior to marriage. I think that it is very rarely total and incurable.

JimG states it well. I would like to add that if you are concerned about your sexual/reproductive functioning it may be beneficial to make an appointment w/ a Urologist to discuss your physical concerns.Depending on your insurance you may need to see your primary care "Dr. first to get a referral.

As far as #3 is concerned, there is nothing that damages a relationship more than deception. If this hypothetical girl can’t commit to you even with your issues, she isn’t the one God intended for you. It’s unfair of you to think of keeping this from someone you’re committing to for life.

thanks for the answers everyone.

thx, does this mean i should tell a girl before even getting in a relationship with her? or like after a month or two? of course i understand i’ll have to tell her before marriage, but would it be immoral to be in a relationship without her knowing?

I think you should have the discussion when things seem to be getting serious. It’s not a first date thing, but when you’re considering a serious relationship it’s time to have that conversation. I do, however, agree that you should see a doctor and find out what, if any, issues there are and if anything can be done for them.

First, find out if it a medical problem.

Many times with young men, they become jaded due to the excessive sexual stimulation that surrounds us in our society. The answer to the problem of occasional impotence in such cases is abstinence; become as chaste as all unmarried Catholics are required to be, in thought as well as deed. There is a lot to be said for the old adage: “absence makes the heart grow fonder”.
Of course, this is in addition to seeking medical care and advice.

I suggest that you see your doctor ASAP as this can be a symptom of a number of health issues, not the least of which is Diabetes why can not only cause your current problem, but a host of other very serious and even life threatening problems.

Call and make that appointment first thing Monday morning.

See this series of articles on Web MD.

You may find that as soon as you have a girlfriend that you are no longer slightly impotent.

The other thing of course is that sometimes changes in sexual function are caused by more serious issues that need to be addressed whether the patient plans marriage or not. If he were short of breath, he wouldn’t say to himself, “Oh, well, I don’t like hiking and there is an elevator at work, so I don’t need to be concerned.” He’d want to find out what was up with his cardiovascular system. That would seem to be a prudent way to consider this issue, too, perhaps.

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