Hello all, I am a new Catholic as of this Easter Vigil. I am married and have three children. One is grown, the other 2 are 14 and 10 years old. My wife and kids did not convert with me. My wife says now that she is not open to more children since we are in our 40’s. I have suggested NFP but she does not like the idea. She stated recently that since she is not Catholic those rules dont apply to her. I tried to explain to her that I could not participate in the “marital act” knowing that she is trying to prevent life. Please help with any suggestions. Thanks
This is something that you need to discuss with your priest. No one here can give you pastoral advice in the context of your marriage situation.
I will refer you to the Vademecum For Confessors, which instructs priests regarding how to counsel someone who confesses contraception and also how to help the the aggrieved spouse in such a situation as you describe where one spouse insists on contracepting.
Obviously *you *cannot contracept-- i.e. condoms, vasectomy, etc. However, under the counsel of your pastor, you can participate in the marital embrace even if your *wife *contracepts under certain circumstances as outlined in the Vademecum.
Again, speak to your priest, as this document is not meant to be carte blanche but rather is for Confessors.
this is a perfect example of a case where you need to speak to your own priest in confession about your own specific situation and let him guide you.