We moved about 7 months ago across the country and we had my MIL come with us. Let me start by saying that she is an amazing MIL. She has always been so loving to us and is an amazing woman who the children, I and my wife love. We all had a culture shock moving here, and we do not intend the move to be permanent. She had a receptionist job at our local hospital back home and then moved here and lived with us for about 5 months until she was in a position to move to her own apartment and get a job. She got a job and is not working very much but moved out to her own apartment.
She has always been a little creature of comfort and in some things kind of fearful. She will not ever drive on the freeway and is very “routine” oriented. This all came to a head recently when she has been having “panic attacks” where she cannot sleep and freaks out. Several nights she has stayed over since moving into her own apartment a month and a half ago.
Recently she has made the rash decision that she MUST move back to our old town ASAP and is willing to abandon her stuff, and her job, break her lease, and leave. She has called me several times crying and says she is just sick to her stomach and cannot function. The catch is, she cannot get back without our help. She is scared to fly and has no plan for when she is back. 2 weeks ago she went to the emergency room and they put her on Zanex. But she has not made a follow up appointment and is “spacing” the pills out only when she has the attacks. I can get her into the doctor next tuesday, which is the day she wanted me to drive her back home. I agreed to take her back if that is what she wanted but I do not feel comfortable doing so until she is stabilized. Her “plan” is to get her old job back which she says she can do, and move in with her mom (grandma) who has her own issues as well. I feel responsible to make sure she is going to be ok.
I think I have realized that I need to be the one to take control and make some decisions for her, which she will probably let me do. But I am starting from zero here. I don’t know her healthcare insurance or even if she has any. I don’t know where to start with getting her some and all I hear about is horror healthcare stories.
I think for now we are going to move her back in with us until she can get stabalized and make some sound decisions and then talk about getting her back home.
She loves her grandkids and they love her.
Any suggestions or experiences would be appreciated.
I need information on:
1)Getting her out of her apartment and if they will be understanding about breaking the lease because of medical issues.
2)Helping her get to a doctor and getting correct treatment for her problems.
3)Getting her insurance situation figured out. If she has any or if she can be on medicaid. And where and how to get that taken care of.
4) Guidance on how to get her back if that is what she really wants and how to make sure that her problem is not 1800 miles away for us to deal with instead of right here.
A little info on us.
I am a stay at home homeschooling dad.
My wife is a genetic plant scientist who is also in an MBA program
We have 4 kids
We have a lot on our plate, and as a family we can handle the MIL situation if we just have a plan of attack. But this has to be done by me as much as possible as my wife is stressed out enough as it is.
Again, on paper we might look flooded with stress but honestly my days are pretty routine and the kids are the easiest part of our lives.
I just need to know where to start and what to say to my MIL.
Oh and of course. Prayers.