So, I think there is something wrong with me. I have never had a deep longing for Motherhood. I have nieces whom I love dearly, but I never think that I want a child. I have friends with babies and am not eager to hold them. The problem I am having is that I am in a relationship with a devout Catholic man whom I love, and I still do not have a longing for Motherhood. Don’t get me wrong, I am open to life because I love our Lord and that is what the Church teaches.

This leads me to think that I might have the wrong vocation!!! eeek!!! But, I read stories of religious that longed for Motherhood. So this lead me to think that I have something wrong with me. :bighanky:


I think in modern times, we have been taught so much against kids, really, from young grades, in school, everywhere, really.

You know how in the Bible, it talks about a time that would be so hard that people would say, "Blessed are the sterile"? Well, it reminds me of what we are in, now.

When I went to public school, we heard a LOT about overpopulation and how we all needed not to have kids. People who had kids almost seemed to be portrayed as irresponsible.

I went to one family's reunion and I was struck by the fact there was not ONE kid there, not one! One couple after another did NOT want any kids!

I live in Mexico, and even the soap operas are different. The women often talk about longing to have kids. From what I can remember of them in the US, soap operas didn't. The kids weren't included that often in them, like they are in ours.

Women's roles have changed so much that women are pushed to go into the workforce pretty much, not like before where they were encouraged to become mothers and stay at home to care, teach their kids.

Some people look at children as an interruption to their lives and careers. It's also VERY hard in modern times, health care, even when TWO are working, sometimes. A lot of people don't want kids, because it's so hard!

I hear in California, you have to decide whether you want a house or children!


I suggest talking to a spiritual director and praying about it. I don't think there is anything wrong with you. If God is calling you to matrimony, He will give you the Grace to carry it out when the time comes.

God Bless:)


I don’t think there’s anything “wrong” with you, Caligirl - especially since I’m in the same boat.:wink:

There’s a difference between having no great yearning for children and being completely opposed to and/or horrified at the thought of having children - the former describes a rather apathetic view, whereas the latter would describe an almost hostility to what usually comes naturally in healthy man/woman relationships.

As long as you are open to children within your marriage, that is all that the Church requires - not that you be hopping up and down, checking your monthly ovulation in anticipation.

It’s not very *common *for most men and women to feel this way, though. As another poster stated, you might eventually change your mind depending upon your age and whether or not you end up marrying this man. I don’t think it’s something you need to worry about, regardless; so long as you discuss this with your boyfriend and understand and respect Church teaching regarding marriage.:slight_smile:


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