[quote="pensmama87, post:3, topic:429729"]
I think she's referring in part to her personal experience, not saying that all men are this way.
I married on the young side by today's standards, and one thing I have liked is that my husband and I have grown up and matured together. One very important aspect of that, though, was that we both honestly wanted to make the other happy at least most of the time, so even with lots of stumbling our good intentions have helped us a great deal. If we'd been exceptionally naive or not good judges of character, though, or even ended up in the path of some exceptionally charming manipulative person, it could have ended up very badly.
One thing I really like about this is that she can see how it worked out well for her (and how it may work out for many of her readers who are still single and looking.) I can appreciate that even if I'm not so much in the intended audience.
DCM is talking about her particular life and her options at different stages of her life.
If she had stayed with her first husband that she married in her mid-20s and eventually got an annulment from, she could probably have had children with him, but within the context of a weird, abusive marriage. She is very happy with her second husband--but they met late in life and haven't been able to have children.
She also talks about how she thinks she herself was not ready for marriage until her early 30s:
"What marriageable age is, is a whole other--but related--question. Although outwardly I must have seemed marriageable at 19, inwardly I just didn't have the necessary personality until I was 32 or so."
Some of us are able to marry early and are very pleased with the results (pensmama87, me, and a lot of other people you'll bump into on CAF). But, what one realizes as one gets older is that a lot of that is pure chance. You meet the right person at the right time and--BAM--true love! Or you don't meet the right person.
A lot of articles aimed at young Catholics and Evangelicals push young marriage and push it hard, and I think DCM's piece is a good antidote to a lot of those pieces. The problem is, it is not entirely under our control when we get to meet our future spouse. If one meets him or her at 22, that can be magical! But people who don't meet the right person are under no obligation to grab the first single person they meet and haul them to the altar. In fact, that is a really bad idea.