My Twin girls Starting JK this september. The school prionciple decided to seperate the twins in two classes. because she feels that this way each child will build her own idendity and will not be dependent on the other child.
I would like to know if you had any experience with twins going to school and do you think it is better to seperate them or keep then together in the same class.
I don’t have twins (or any children, for that matter), but I think it sounds like a great idea. I think the most compelling reasons is that they’ll avoid being compared to each other by their teachers and classmates (As in, “That’s the twin who’s good at math. This is the one who is more creative”). I would think that sort of stereotyping could be very limiting for young girls and they probably get enough of it outside of school. By separating them into two classrooms, your daughters will be able to discover their own likes and dislikes, make some of their own friends, and yes, spend some time away from each other. And if it truly does turn out to be a mess, it’s only for a year.
I don’t have twins. But I have twin brothers-in-law (my husband’s brothers). I believe it has long been a practice to separate twins, if possible, for the reasons your principle stated.
Twins do tend to get treated as a unit. They often get a single birthday gift to share between them. (The advantage is that they often GIVE a single gift when attending the parties of others.) Relatives refer to them as “the Twins” rather than by their names. (I’ve seen this in the labeling of family pictures.)
Twins will still get the advantages of being twins, even if in separate classes. Separating them gives them the advantages of being individuals (as well as a taste of any disadvantages.)
Thank you so much for your replies, I think I am going with what the principle suggested and separate the girls and see what happens. if it doesn’t work out I will ask her to put them back in the same class.
Two of my little brothers are twins (now almost 18 and preparing for University!) and they were inseperable when they were babies and toddlers, they used to be able to help each other out of their cot before they could even talk. Two of my cousins, Elouise & William are also cousins who must be coming up to about 13/14 now.
My brothers and my cousins went to Kindergarten together as ‘twin-sets’ so to speak, and spent Reception and Y1 together but as they moved up the school they were eventually separated more and more, until when they were in Y4 they had separate teachers for all of their classes and separate registration/home rooms. The school my brothers attended wanted to keep them together until Senior school but my mother didn’t like them being treated as ‘The Twins’. My cousins’ school was much more sensible and separated them completely by Y4, realising the value of personal development.
Speaking just about my brothers, they used to get invited to birthday parties together, used to get one present addressed to ‘The Twins’ from other parents and they were rarely ever referred to as Mark & Andrew at school, the teachers would refer to them as ‘The Twins’ and would call them over to speak to them together, they never encouraged separate interests and expected them to stay together all the time, they didn’t encourage them to make other friends.
My Mumsy didn’t think this was very good for them, yes, they are ‘a pair’, yes, it is special that they were born on the same day, and yes, they are closer to each other than to the rest of us but they are two separate people! They will have separate interests, separate lives, they should have separate friends and activities, they shouldn’t be treated as one of a pair for the entirety of their school lives.
Twins can sometimes be very insular, the ‘cute’ little ‘made-up’ language that no one else understands is cute when they’re small but as they get older they have to realise that they are not always going to be together, they are not always going to be holding each other’s hands and that they do have to make an effort and talk to other members of their classes.
My brothers are now in their final year of school and both Mark & Andrew have decided to take two of the same classes, but still have 3 separate. They have grown to be completely different people, they do still share common interests and they still get on better than any of my other siblings put together but they are also individual human beings in their own right, with their own friends, their own lives, their own girlfriends!!
If they were Irish Twins you would not expect them to stay together all the time surely? I don’t quite understand what makes people think that just because two siblings are Twins, they shouldn’t be treated as individuals and should be expected to stay together.
I have boy/girl twins starting 3rd grade this year. They have always stayed in the same classes, though we are asked if we want to seperate them. The only issue to come up is where one will answer for the other and vise versa, but the teacher has quickly corrected that. Because of the small rural school, they will probably stay together until 6th grade. Tim