My child is becoming very anti-Catholic

I’m nearing the end of my RCIA and will enter the Church, Lord willing, on Easter Vigil this year. My 8 year old daughter is becoming increasingly antiCatholic. She says she will “never, ever, ever become a Catholic” (said with much hatred) and that she hates the Catholic Church.

My husband is a non-confirmed, non-practicing Catholic. My kids have only known the Baptist church we attend. We attend our separate Sunday School classes at the Baptist church a f then go to Mass. it’s not ideal, but it’s a starting point.

The Baptist church is fun. The kids programs are entertaining and they do a great job of teaching bible stories, doing service projects, etc. But it’s not the full truth.

My husband says he may never become fully Catholic. He has never had firm religious convictions. He has the attitude of if I just ignore it, it’ll go away. He does not take the lead of Spiritual Head of our family. He is a wonderful person, but just not a great leader.

I don’t want to dishonor him or God but going against his wishes, however, in the end, I will have to answer to God concerning my salvation and what I did to encourage my children in the faith.

My other kids like the Baptist church because it is “fun”. They don’t have anti-Catholic attitudes though.

I don’t know what to do, or if I should do anything at all.

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I wouldn’t push it too much for now. If she argues or fights you as she gets older, I would try asking her gentle questions. But I doubt if she’s at that point yet.

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I doubt an eight year old is actually “anti-Catholic.” It’s not like she has firm theological opinions. She’s probably just upset that your pending conversion is disrupting her routine.

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Where is your child getting this attitude?

Is it something she picked up at Baptist Sunday School? Or from her father? Or other relatives?
Has she seen you and your husband arguing over Catholicism?
Is she annoyed because RCIA classes have taken up your time and attention, leaving less for her?
Does she not like having to sit through Mass?
Or is she just going through a phase of being rebellious?

I would say with respect to the church, given that she’s already 8 and past the age of reason, she’ll have to decide on her own whether to join the Catholic Church. However, she needs to be told that it is not permissible to “hate” anyone’s religion and especially not the religion of an immediate family member. It’s disrespectful, prejudiced, and rude. She likely doesn’t understand how inappropriate it is, given that she’s 8 and kids will say they “hate” all kinds of things meaning that they just don’t prefer them.

If she’s getting this idea that hating on the Catholic Church, or hating on anyone else’s church, is okay from somebody she’s hanging around, I would be inclined to cut off the contact or wean her away from it as fast as possible.
If there’s some other reason she’s expressing this, then once you know what that reason is, you can have a talk with her and address it. But the hate speech has got to go.

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Believe me, I agree. I do not tolerate it at all and it’s something we have talked about extensively.

It’s distressing as a parent to hear these things coming from her.

If you’re sure it’s not coming from any outside source, like some Baptist friend of hers (which seems unlikely given that your other children aren’t expressing the same), then I’d say it might be something you just have to keep firmly reminding her about. Over time she should gain in maturity and realize she’s being intolerant.

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Do you actually mean anti-Catholic, or do you just mean she’s not too keen on the Catholic services, possibly because they’re a bit dull compared with what she gets at her Baptist church? When you say “anti-Catholic” it puts me in mind of the Orangemen…

An eight year old probably isn’t really anti-Catholic. It’s possible that she’s just repeating or “modeling” behaviors that she’s seen before. Is there anyone in the Baptist church who really hates Catholicism and is vocal about it?

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For now, my recommendation is that you ask and listen to why she is saying this. What does she mean when she says she hates the CC?

The next step is to respect her feelings but guide them into an appropriate way to express her displeasure without using the word hate and to also address whatever those reasons are.

Does she give reasons for this hate?

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First off, Welcome home! If I were in your shoes I ask her why she feels this way? Eight years have a knack for hating things they don’t understand. Also is there any fun family activities at the catholic church your family could do? Talk to your RCIA sponsor and see what they say.

God bless.

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She is only 8. If I were you, I’d let her know that I understand how she feels and help her find more appropriate ways to express her feelings. Otherwise, I’d do nothing. She is likely just upset about the change in her routine. She will adjust.

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^^^This…maybe…if it is, I can relate with her? After re-reading your OP it sounds like you all go to the Baptist church together, but then you go to Mass by yourself.

Does she (your family) every go to the Catholic church with you?

In my experience, AWANA can be very anti Catholic, although that somewhat depends on the leader.

No we go together.

Thank you!
That’s a good idea. I’ll ask about it next RCIA class.

I’m not familiar with Orangemen, sorry.

The things she has said have been very anti Catholic. I don’t know if it’s just her being 8, or if it’s somethung more serious.

I’ve heard that too, and thankfully she’s not in Awanas.

Thabks for the advice. It’s something I’m definitely going to keep an eye on.

Not that I know of, but it may be more subtle than outright being taught that Catholicism is bad. I do know that she has done the sign of the cross before and other kids and adults stared st her and made her feel embarrassed. Maybe that’s the issue- the inconsistency of attending both churches. I’m tryung not to push my husband on this too fast since he’s still very attached to the Baptist church.

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What exactly does she say? Are you sure she’s anti-Catholic, or just doesn’t want to change churches because she has friends at the old one and finds it more fun? You can’t really be “anti-something” if you don’t even know what it is about. What are her complaints?

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