My Cross was a gift of love and had a purpose after all

I went and prayed before the Blessed Sacrament and Jesus spoke to me.

He told me that the congregation I was in as a child was a fake. And so he gave me this cross because he knew that I would eventually abandon the fake, seeing that they could not free me from this cross.

But instead of searching for him, I went out into the world, I went out into the world seeking to be free of this cross by my own efforts. And so he left the cross with me so that I would keep searching. Finally I wound up at the synagogue where I met the God of Israel and found that He could free me from this cross. But I wanted to share what I had found with everyone and so He called me into the Church. But I was still in a state of sin. I was a drunkard and a pot smoker and carried on several other sins. And so he left me with cross as in my drunken, stoned state, I could not see him.

And so I have repented of my sins. I am clean and sober, I have quit smoking cigarettes and pot and carrying on in other sins.

And so now, clean and sober, I have turned to a life of prayer.

I am still a fallen sinner, still in need of savior to lead me out from my sins but now I am seeking Jesus.

He told me he gave me this cross so that I would come and find him because he is the only one that can set me free of it. And so, as much as I hate to admit it, this wretched cross was a gift of love after all. For without it, I would not have sought the savior but would have stayed among the lost at my childhood congregation, reveling in my sins instead of seeking the savior to set me free of them.

And so I said, “well, then, I’m here. Show me yourself. Show me who you are. But I no longer need it. It has served it’s purpose. Set me free of it.”

If Jesus answered after that, I don’t know if I heard it.

I might have met the one. I didn’t meet her for the first time tonight but I did see her tonight.

I don’t know if she is the one or not. She says that she is but I have my doubts.

Please pray and ask God to reveal to me whether or not it is her.

Please, dear God, don’t let this be another “learning experience.” Please don’t let this be yet another disappointment.

Please pray that this is for real. Please.

Hello,

Some sisterly advice; a lady who tells you she is ‘the one’ after such short acquaintance is acting very precipitously, to say the least.

You cannot know ‘the one’ until you know her properly; the people she comes from, her faith, her values, her intentions as to husband and family. You will receive teaching experiences until you learn. :slight_smile:

If you like this lady; get to know her, pray for a clear mind and guidance and you will be shown the way. Tread carefully; it is easy to marry badly but hard to live with that marriage thereafter.

I am so happy for you that you’ve left your bad habits behind. You’re on the right path; continue forward.

Warmest best wishes,

Jenny

Very good advice. :thumbsup:

Never said that it was a short acquaintance. You just made that up.

I’ve known this woman about a year now.

But regardless, you all need to pray that this really is the real thing.

Yeah. I posted a prayer about that already. I “need” to pray for the grace to accept God’s will…for both of us.

God is not a magic gumball machine…where you put in prayers, the “right” faith, or the "perfect " lifestyle, and get a miracle. you know that, right?

Please don’t accuse people of making things up, when that was a perfectly reasonable interpretation of your phrasing.

Yes. I don’t quite undstand this:

The fixation on “the one” frankly, concerns me.

According to your posts, OP, you met her at church, about a year ago, never really talked until this one time, and she insisted she’s “the one?”

I’m not being snarky…just trying to understand.

I have to enquire; Did she actually ‘say’ she’s the one? Or was it a ‘sense’ that you got?
Seriously, it may help us understand what is going on.

And if she actually said the words “I’m the one”, what was that in reference to?

Please don’t be offended, just seeking clarity.

Your threads are starting to grow on me Jeremyah… Its like an ongoing live adventure series, I can’t wait for the next “episode” :thumbsup:

Good luck to you my friend! :smiley:

Sounds like private revelation. Let’s consult a moderator.

If I didn’t say it, there’s no reason to assume it. If you don’t know, you should ask. Something like, “a short acquaintance” wasn’t in the OP and there was nothing in the OP to suggest that. There’s was zero mention at all about my past with this person other than I did NOT meet her for the first time last night.

The fixation on “the one” frankly, concerns me.

According to Catholic doctrine, and by definition of what a marriage is, whoever you marry is ‘the one.’ Am I not right about that? (Yes, I am.) So what, exactly is your concern?

Actually, I know and I don’t hold it against you. Some people have this ridiculous idea that there is the “right one” and only one “right one” and if you don’t marry “the one,” but someone else, then you missed “the one.” or some other kind of nonsense like that.

No, The way it works is whoever you marry becomes “the one” once the knot is tied.

According to your posts, OP, you met her at church, about a year ago,

Never said where I met her. Stop reading things into my posts that I didn’t say.

never really talked until this one time,

Didn’t say that either. I’ve talk to her a lot actually. Again, stop reading stuff into the post that isn’t there. Your making assumptions based upon absolutely nothing that I actually posted and batting zero.

and she insisted she’s “the one?”

We have a past. But I’m no dummy (I’m actually world’s more intelligent that what you are apparently giving me credit for).

I’m not being snarky…just trying to understand.

Asking about what you don’t know instead of just making stuff up is the key to understanding.

And yes, that’s exactly what you did. The only thing I said about my relationship with this woman was that I met her sometime previous to last night (but didn’t say how long ago) and that I saw her last night (didn’t say where), and that she is saying that she’s the one. I didn’t say anything else about our relationship. And so you made up a bunch of stuff to fill in the blanks.

The scenario you came up with is absurd and if that was the real story or the one I typed, I wouldn’t blame you at all for thinking that I was off my rocker or that this woman was off her rocker and that I was a glutton for punishment for even considering this relationship (I tend to flee from women who decide in an instant, without knowing me or anything about me, that I’m the one).

But I didn’t type a story and that’s not the situation.

So here it is. I met this woman in a Catholic Chat room about a year ago. She says that she is Catholic as was her parents but they live in a Muslim country. The year before we met, she said that the Muslims in her city turned violent against the Christian community there and killed her parents. I did some research on the news feeds in her country and everything that she said happened just as she reported it.

I’m not going to disclose anything else about the situation for the sake of her privacy but she was in trouble and I could help her out and so I did.

(Off on a tagent: I’m reluctant to even state that I did that because I don’t ever want to be doing my good works to be seen by men but to be seen by the Father in Heaven. Jesus said that we are to be a light to the world but he also said not to do good just for show or to be praised and I’m actually somewhat confused about where the balance is there. I have over developed frontal lobes and a very active mind and so I’m most often overly conscious or overly aware of other people and how I might be perceived. I find this to be a huge distraction because, like if I’m praying in Church and someone else comes in, I immediately become aware of their presence and start worrying that I’m loosing my blessings because now I’m being seen by others and, well you know. I think too much. I have to take meds to shut my brain off so that I can sleep at night. Otherwise I’ll be up for days).

Anyway, and so I helped her out. She is now trying to apply for refugee status with the UN so that she come to the USA, or at least leave her country and go live in one where isn’t life threatening to be a Christian.

I told her that if she can have her lawyer give me a call, that I can help her (I know how to track people online and I also know how to track phone numbers. She really does live in the country that she claims to be in. Once her lawyer calls, I’ll be able to check to find out if he really is a refugee/immigration lawyer by the phone number he uses).

Along the way, we have talked about possibly getting married. We use webcams to see each other and we both find each other attractive. (She’s just gorgeous. Every time I see her, I have to head to the Eucharistic Chapel for an hour or two just to calm down. And she says that I’m really cute.:smiley: ).

Problem is I don’t entirely trust her. Part of that is because you really can’t actually “know” a person until you’ve actually met them face to face.

Also, it’s partly because she is just so gorgeous. Too gorgeous. She’s so pretty that something in my brain clicks on and says, “she’s too pretty to be real. Something’s up.”

Anyway, I have told her that if she’s for real, I will help her leave the country regardless of whether or not she really wants to marry me. And I mean that. And so there’s no reason for her to lie to me just to get my help.
(continued)

But she’s told me that she’s had dreams about us and our children. She’s also told me not to seek relationships with other women but to wait for her.

I’ve told her that I’m an Aspie, have bipolar and OCD and sometimes just a little bit bonkers but she says that’s okay, that with God’s help, we’ll work through it. (Also, she didn’t say this but I know how Muslim men are and any way you slice it, I’m a huge improvement over any of the locals. Also, I have a good body. I’m built like Tyler Durden. LOL)

I really, really hope that she’s for real. I really hope this isn’t some scam or some “learning” experience. When we met, God knew that I would be the one to step up and help her. He also knows my state of mind and that I’m so very sick of “learning” experiences and “humility” lessons.

Please pray that God reveals to me the truth of this situation. That’s probably would I should have been asking for people to pray about the entire time.

I actually just covered that. Read my two long posts to Miserissima

Maybe it was but I don’t see that it necessarily breaks the rules or should be interpreted that way.

The story in the OP is what really happened. If I attribute it to Jesus telling me this, then I am only affirming that Jesus speaks the truth.

LOL

Thank you, actually. That puts a smile on my face. Tells me that I am lovable, maybe even likable, despite my eccentricities. (And yes, I’m eccentric. The difference between being eccentric and just plain weird is whether or not you’ve ever actually made money off of your peculiarities. And I have and so I am officially eccentric).

Did you give me any of that info? Nope all have from you ours, what I quoted, which is why I DID ASK, AC/DC put it in the form of question. Just like on Jeopardy.

Speaking of questions, you didn’t answer any of mine.,

As in both cases, the end of the sentence is marked with a “?”.

I’m also very curious about the frontal love, development.

Did you have an actual MRI or are you’re diagnoses based on reported behavior?

I’ve told her that I’m an Aspie, have bipolar and OCD and sometimes just a little bit bonkers but she says that’s okay, that with God’s help, we’ll work through it. (Also, she didn’t say this but I know how Muslim men are and any )

This isn’t the same as "

I don’t care whether or not you agree or understand with the rules; saying so doesn’t indicate that I done “care” about you, either. Private Revelation detailshere: forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=434589

Did you give me any of that info about skyping with your intended? Nope. All I from you is what I quoted, which is why I DID ASK, and put it in the form of question. Just like on Jeopardy.

Funny how you say I’m reading into things with limited info, but choose to give limited info as well as skim my posts. OCD folks are usually much more…thorough. YMMV.

Speaking of questions, you didn’t answer any of mine. Notice that?

As in both cases, the end of the question is marked with a “?”. Aspies commonly identify these visual cues.

I’m also very curious about the frontal lobe development you claim to have. Did you have an actual MRI or is your diagnoses based on reported behavior alone?

**I’ve told her that I’m an Aspie, have bipolar and OCD and sometimes just a little bit bonkers but she says that’s okay, that with God’s help, we’ll work through it. (Also, she didn’t say this but I know how Muslim men are and any **

This isn’t quite the same as “she said, she is the one,” now is it?

Well, I wasn’t intending to break the rules. I went to Eucharistic prayer and that’s the conversation that I felt like Jesus was having with me. The way that I understand private revelation is when someone claims that Jesus told them something that isn’t in the gospels, like a new revelation. If what I said in the OP contained any thing that added to the Gospel, I was unaware of it and certainly didn’t intend that.

I’ll reread the sticky about the private revelations. I really am sincerely sorry on this post if I broke the rules. I was merely trying to state that I’ve found something positive in this after all and share that with others.

Did you give me any of that info about skyping with your intended? Nope. All I from you is what I quoted, which is why I DID ASK, and put it in the form of question. Just like on Jeopardy.

Sorry, you are right, you did ask. But according to the OP, I never said I met her at Church or that we’d never talked until this one time.

Funny how you say I’m reading into things with limited info, but choose to give limited info as well as skim my posts. OCD folks are usually much more…thorough. YMMV.

Actually, I responded to everything in the particular post in question. I usually do read every thing in your posts. I think you are very intelligent and very insightful, even if you aren’t very nice to me.

But I actually like that. I think I need more people in my life to be as blunt and honest with me as you are. I send you a friend request. Feel free to pm me any time you want and feel free to be as mean to me as you feel the need to be. I might not respond to every thing you say but I do read it all and consider it.

You are right. I did give very limited info. And people, including yourself, filled in the blanks with their own imaginations.

Speaking of questions, you didn’t answer any of mine. Notice that?

I didn’t respond to some of your posts so I’ll do that here:

God is not a magic gumball machine…where you put in prayers, the “right” faith, or the "perfect " lifestyle, and get a miracle. you know that, right?

Yes I do. I’m actually usually very resistant to the idea of miracles. I’m not trying to get people to pray for me to marry because I think some magic will happen (I actually hate the idea of magic and find it offensive). I’m trying to get people to pray for this because I believe that people pray for something, they’ll act to see that prayer answered. I have no idea at all who here or anywhere else might play the key role into bringing me and the future Mrs together and so the more people that are praying for this, the greater likelihood that the right people will be praying for it and act.

Does that make sense?

As in both cases, the end of the question is marked with a “?”. Aspies commonly identify these visual cues.

I’m also very curious about the frontal lobe development you claim to have. Did you have an actual MRI or is your diagnoses based on reported behavior alone?

Based upon reported behavior and tests. I would like to see an actual MRI scan though. I think it would be interesting.

**I’ve told her that I’m an Aspie, have bipolar and OCD and sometimes just a little bit bonkers but she says that’s okay, that with God’s help, we’ll work through it. (Also, she didn’t say this but I know how Muslim men are and any **

This isn’t quite the same as “she said, she is the one,” now is it?

Actually, she did say that she was ‘the one’ but I don’t think she meant it in the dopey, stupid way that our pop culture means it.

She told me that she believes that Mother Mary and God brought us together. I like I mentioned before, she told me not to pursue relationships with other women and to believe that we will get married and be together.

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