Please pray as I have bad pain in my injured hand from driving my son around for 3 days just after getting the stitches removed, in order to address his situation. I took him to the mall last night to buy him clothing and shoes, which he needed, when I consciously needed to rest my hand after doing a few small errands of my own. I did this upon being subjected to a stream of invective by him using language I won’t repeat. As we left the mall, because I said No to one last item as I felt nauseous and out of control and was desperate to finish up, he went out the door ahead of me cursing and calling me a lunatc. Two black women who were entering turned around and looked at me, stunned. Is that your son? they asked. We then learned of the visit by FHP regarding his criminal traffic violation, which we both thought his father was making up. I pointed out to him that he would have felt stupid if I had “babied” him, an 18-yr-old w pending criminal charges, and bought him that last shirt. He agreed. It was the first time in his whole life I have successfully said No. He was spoiled by my mother and I was left to take the consequences and the blame, meanwhile being too disabled, in reality, to care for him properly, so I only felt guilty and the vicious cycle of his going back to my mother and being reinforced in his infuriating and frightening disrespect toward me, continued. Meanwhile, his father worked out of town w my father’s telephonic, professional and emotional support. Generally I got a kick in the a–.
So against my advice he took off, when we returned home, after looking at the citations, and went to see friends and has not returned (it is 8 am the next morning.)
My husband is successfully hiding behind his head injury. He is still capable of being extremely polite and making a show of respect and the police love him. Meanwhile the community, including, I am sad to say, its Catholics, have looked on w contempt as this situation has slowly grown to a huge proportion over 13 years. And I am praying to join RCIA and my feelings about the community make me feel like a liar in it.
If my left hand is damaged even temporarily 1, I won’t be able to drive to the Project Rachel counseling, 2, I will be at risk of a Baker Act as I will be vulnerable if I am having physical difficulty w the things that need to get done and my husband will take advantage of any opportunity to do this to me [a Baker Acting isFla term for involuntary psych commitment]; and 3, I will be vulnerable generally to my husbands ploys to try to get me to sign an unfavorable divorce agreement and move out of state so he can buy a Mazerati and continue his present lifestlye which is costly and the details of which do not bear mentioning.
I am angry. Love is slow to anger, but even Jesus did get angry. I am praying for Justice in this whole situation, and that the Lord shows mercy according to Jesus’ teaching, whatever that may mean for everybody involved including myself. The Lord loves accurate scales–Proverbs. Let my son be treated accordingly by the Justice system, as he is the way he is for a reason, please don’t let me forget his hurt and his kindness, and would you pray for me that through all this we get to the bottom of this whole mess and that Justice is thoroughly served? And let us all be “called according to the purposes of the Lord,” I pray, and repent and believe.