…but I’m just not emotionally able to be there for him right now. We are almost at five years of marriage (in just a couple weeks :D), but that will also mark our fifth year of being infertile. Now please stop and read before you continue: we don’t want you to “fix” our infertility. We financially can’t adopt so that is not an option either. I need advice for my marriage, not our fertility.
I know he’s jealous that the children we don’t have get more thought and attention in my mind (I have OCD so tend to obsess, yes I’m in counseling and on meds) than he does. I often get so sad that I can’t even talk normally to him most of the time. Or sometimes I’m upset about other things too. (Usually whatever my OCD latched on to at the time.) It’s really getting to him. He says he misses being able to spend time with me. I’m physically present, but mentally absent. He would never dream of divorce or even separation, but I know he’s not getting all he wants out of this marriage. He feels so very bad that he cannot give me children physically, or financially (we can’t afford adoption). But he doesn’t want our infertility to ruin the rest of our lives as husband and wife, but I just can’t seem to get over it. He’s trying to make the best of what we have been given by God (a Christian Marriage), but I can’t seem to pull through for him because I’m stuck at ground zero with me, myself and I (and of course the children that don’t exist in our marriage.) What should I do? I want to be the wife he needs and wants me to be, but how? I am already in counseling and on medications, but they do very little to help. Please help me if you can! Thanks.