I'm a university student, living about a 2-3hour drive away from home. I only go home for a week or two at easter, summer, christmas. So I've only been home three times in the last year, and I moved out just over a year ago.
When I moved out the relationship between me and my mum was very poor. We argued a lot. She was very... odd at times too. Two occasions illistrate her odd behaviour really well. The first was when I was helping my little sister, who was about 12 at the time, with her homework project. I spent about 3 hours one evening sitting down with her at the computer and helping her make the powerpoint presentation. We showed it to dad when we were finished and he liked it, but mum thought it was rubbish and she even described it like that. Didn't have anything nice to say about it. She told me to do it again from the begining. I refused to do it again because me and my sister had spent so long on it. She refused to help my sister make all those changes that SHE wanted. My sister was happy with it. The argument went on for a while, and eventually my mum asked my dad to step in, and my dad took my side. My mum... went crazy. Ran upstairs and was crying hysterically, slamming doors, stomping her feet. The second example was when she was brushing my sister's hair. She was brushing quickly because my sister was almost late for school, and my mum must have brushed through a knot very quickly cause my sister cried out that mum had hurt her and had brushed through a horrible knot. My mum started shouting repeatedly "It wasn't me! It wasn't me! It wasn't me!".
She's aggressive and controlling as well. While living at home I boiled a kettle once everyone was in bed, it was about 10:30pm. Mum must have been awake, cause she came down, and shouted at me for daring to be so selfish, then she walked of. I went back into the living room alone, but she came back again to shout again. I got so frustrated I hit her. By that point I was suffering from depression and anxiety from the constant emotional abuse because of how everything I did was wrong, and it got too much. She slapped me full across the face and kicked me out of the house. I felt awful for hitting her - I didn't hit her hard, it was more like the kind of tap you'd give a child. I wasn't aiming to hurt, just to make a point of how angry I was and to try and get her to go away. At the time she had her face pressed up to mine and was spitting at me she was that angry. I was allowed back "home" again, but only a few weeks afterwards she kicked me out because I threw something (can't remember what) at a wall in frustration. I was frustrated because she confisgated my iPod and told me I could have it back if I did ___. I did do __ and therefore asked for it back. I was told I had to wait another 2 weeks to have my iPod back cause I was "cheeky for asking for it instead of waiting to be given it". My iPod was very important to me because I had no friends who would walk the 40mins to school with me, therefore it was the only company I had.
She is a hypocondriac but is afraid of doctors. She's also afraid of transport in case there's an accident (cars, trains, buses, etc). Also afraid of dying. She has relationship issues with her mum, and stepdad. She has never met her real dad, nor knows his name.
I moved away deliberately to a university far away, on the other side of England. Strangely though my mum agreed to pay half of my tuition fees, and she still helps now.
Things have changed a lot since I moved out. Here is the details divided up by holiday.
Christmas - I found it very hard coming back home, because it brought lots of negative memories back, I missed my boyfriend, and my mum was unusually nice. Eventually though the arguments started, and as normal my dad always had to take her side or she'll be mad at him too. Spent most of it on the phone in tears to my boyfriend.
Easter - My mum was still the same, but different. She wasn't going out as much. Not even to walk the dog. She was a lot more childlike in her personality. My boyfriend came with me this time, and even in front of him she was nasty. I started a lot of the arguments though, because I was frustrated with her being childlike and pretending everything was okay, and still had a grudge the next day, every day, because each day she'd argue with me in front of my boyfriend.
Summer - My mum was a social recluse. Hardly ever left the house. If she did, it was only with my dad, who is now working 7 days a week sometimes. She only ever went out with a walking stick cause she was scared of falling. She's only in her mid-40s. Was just as unbearable to talk to without arguing as normal.
I related all this information to some of my friends, and they think I should call my GP to express my concerns. What should I do? :( She's declining really fast, I'm worried about my dad working so much and how this is going to effect my little sister, I've been treated for depression, and when I was kicked out the school referred me to their counselling service and to the council for "family therapy" which never happened. I had to live at several different friend's houses for days at a time, and declare myself homeless at one point too. My school phoned my mum and told her I would have to declare myself homeless if she didn't take me back, and she said she didn't care.