My parents are not pleased with my sister's career choice?


Hello everyone! So, my sister and I have kind of already chosen what sort of careers that we want to have when we are older. I want to become a Surgeon/Businesswoman, while my sister wants to become a singer/actress. My parents are not pleased with my sister’s career choice and want her to choose something like a doctor or surgeon. My sister has had a desire to become a singer and actress since she was very young and she is a cantor in our church. She performs a lot and even has a little fan base going. I know that the entertainment industry is corrupted and not good, but my sister is very aware of that and she insists that she won’t fall like many celebrities often do, why is why my parents are against her career choice. I’m pretty sure that my sister’s desire is a calling from God and that’s what she truly meant to do, as she is gifted with a good voice. I’ve heard that the catechism states that Parents should not coerce the child’s career choice, if I am not mistaken. What can we do?


Your parents likely don’t want her to be a singer/actress because of the lack of employment prospects. Of the millions that aspire to such careers, only a tiny few will succeed. I wasted years in my twenties pursuing that type of career, and it didn’t work out. Unfortunately, I had no back-up plan, so when my music degree couldn’t help me secure a job, I was lost. I wish I could go back in time and never go near the music industry. It is just too risky. If your sister wants to sing and act, she should indeed pursue that. However, she should do that while pursuing an education in a real job. You will find that many actors have degrees for that very reason.

Blessings to you and your sister.


wow, I’ve never thought of that. I’ll be sure ti tell my sister to think of a back up plan if her plan does not suceed.


Yes. For example you don’t need a college degree to be an actor; however you do need one to be an engineer. So I would advise everyone to go to college to study for a profession while doing their acting/singing at the same time. Then it’s a win-win situation…


Well, I’m not sure it’s just the filth in entertainment that would or should deter a career there.

It’s that it is a difficult field to go into in terms of finding consistent employment, and there are no guarantees. :sadyes:

I’ve stood by the fact that ultimately people need to choose their paths, not their parents. But parental advice here should not be discarded so easily and/or quickly and your sister should carefully discern her path.



The Catholic Church teaches that parents should not force career or marriage choices on their adult children.

If your sister were to study singing and acting, and get a minor or double major in something like business adminstration, then she’d be able to fill a niche. Lots of times business majors don’t understand the artistic areas, and the artists don’t know business, so those who study both are in a good position, being somewhat less common.


This is great advice. Seconded!


Another possibility would be for her to go into a college major that has a music or acting basis. Maybe she could study to become a music teacher or an acting (or speech) teacher, or even a music therapist (a growing field)? My cousin was a music major in college and, after making a shaky living as a musician for a few years, returned to school to get a Masters in Arts Administration (a variety of an MBA). He is now the program director for a big museum, and is extremely happy and fulfilled.


Let’s not forget Dolores Hart, who kissed Elvis on screen and later became a nun. :wink:


Unless a person wishes to become a music or drama teacher, I still think a general music degree can be risky. Music therapy is a specific qualification, but a major in music is not a specific qualification. I would still urge caution to anyone paying thousands of dollars for that type of degree.

I think your cousin is really lucky, nunsuch. Well done to him.


I have been a professional theatre actor (don’t really do this professionally any more) and dabbled in tv/film. I also have Christian friends in the profession. Training is big in this industry. It shows not only that you are committed, but also gives CDs reference to your ability, background, and a person who can vouch for you (the teacher). A resume with crummy or no training will be passed over by legitimate agents and CDs.

I think your sister should study something that interests her in college, but also that is very practical. She could then minor or double major in theatre/acting. If she lives in NYC or LA, she could also study with one of the legit and better acting teachers, though doing both college and studying acting would be hard to do at the same time (but it’s possible). I think it’s okay to pursue music/acting when you’re young and don’t have family responsibilities, but she should go to college first since she’ll be new to the industry. But she should finish and not languish there (i.e. don’t waste time).

As far as the perceived sliminess of the industry, it’s overstated in general. Most actors are very nice, even shy, people. They are not normally the problem. The industry people normally just want to make money (that’s where their success/job security lies) and casting notices are very upfront about anything like nudity, working in water/heights, sex scenes, etc. No one wants filming/rehearsals to start and then an actor pulls out of the project. So being upfront is standard.

Here’s where the true sliminess is normally: the fringes. People who talk big, who act like they’ve got something going when they don’t, who are looking for the gullible/naive people to take advantage of. Your sister must demand professionalism from herself and all others. Legitimate jobs are not found on Craigslist (ever), legit jobs have contracts/work memos, legit jobs have a crew and a schedule, legit jobs can be non-paying, but they do not cast or film from people’s apartments/houses. If your sister has standards, she’ll be fine. If she can’t get legit work, then she should know that no shady source is going to lead to it. It just isn’t in the cards for her.

One final note, Christians and other religious people do work in the industry. They are blessings to their coworkers and the industry as a whole. They may have opportunities that they turn down from time to time, but no one will hold this against them. Every actor has to make those choices for themselves and they can be religious or just personal tastes/comforts. Sometimes God calls people to places to be a light and to show his love.


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