Hey, folks. It’s been several years since I last posted here. But, recently, I felt a call back to the faith :signofcross: I am currently continuing to deal with a severe case of the scruples. I have OCD, which compounds to create quite a dilemma for me. I feel like God blessed me with an answer recently to my scruples, as I tend to see not everything I worry about as being mortally sinful, let alone a sin in the first place. I have come to seek guidance on a few issues which I intend to pray about and discuss with my confessor.
Recently, at my Catholic High School, I have encountered several issues…
I feel like I am committing a sin by not wishing every person I talk to a “God Bless” at the end of every conversation. Sometimes, I try to force it and I get looked upon as if I have three heads. Sometimes I don’t do it at all out of fear of the awkwardness of the context. The same thing in my workplace: I work at Staples, and I don’t necessarily know if my bosses would like it if I attempt to bring faith into the workplace in regards to my interactions with customers. By ommiting saying “God Bless”, am I commiting some degree of sin?
I am currently 16, turning 17 in a few months, and I am employed. For the purpose of this discussion, I should note that I have about 600 dollars saved up from work. The issue here is this: I have made a list of items I believe I should technically be obligated to make restitution for. The most recent of all of these items was when I was a freshman, before I had really begun to be enveloped in my faith as much as I am now (praise God). My parents told me I’m essentially torturing myself by worrying about making restitution for the sins of my youth. I have confessed to stealing in several forms, but oddly enough I’ve never mentioned restitution. I feel consumed by this issue, like I won’t be able to be fully peaceful until I can make right by each and every person on my list. Some items are pretty practical, like repaying Target an estimated $25 for an item I stole. Others include a baseball card (likely worth no more than $5) that I stole from a flea market. One is even a textbook from 6th grade that I kept, or books from my 7th grade English teacher’s class library that I kept. She is now retired, yet I still have the books in my possession. I know by doctrine we are obligated to make restitution, but I truly wish there is something to do to cover it all and leave it behind in a “fresh start”. Additionally, I downloaded illegal music before, or listened to songs illegally shared on YouTube. How would make restitution for those? There’s so many things that are troubling me that I don’t know where to begin. Every time I feel like I have a plan on how to deal with it, another item I need to atone for rises to my mind. It’s a never ending vicious cycle!
I had a debate with an atheist in my religion class the other day, and after he handed me his email and said we could continue the debate onto email. He is very confident in his atheistic ways. Should I be obligated to continue this discussion with him? I don’t really want to, but I don’t know if I don’t whether or not I’ll be sinning on some level. I don’t want to have him plant seeds of doubt in my heads after finally being at peace with my faith.
I sometimes tend to be lazy in my schoolwork, knowing it is not right. My parents to pay for my education, and I am so grateful and blessed by God for that. So, if I tend to procrastinate in my homework, or not do certain questions or problems, is it mortally sinful?
PEACE AND LOVE,