PRAY PRAY PRAY!
My wife was Southern Baptist but had been going to a Presbyterian Church with me for the past 16 years. When I told her I thought God wanted us to become Catholic she went to RCIA but we had many of the same discussions.
I kept telling her I wanted this to be right for her as well and like you said we could go to different Churches but the boys were already in Catholic School and she wanted to raise them Catholic.
At the first introduction to the Church (the one outside) she made it clear she was still searching for answers. Our RCIA directors, teachers and Deacon were very supportive in anything she asked or needed.
I believe part of it was, once we became Catholic, that was it. Protestant church shop often. Although we had not, it was always an option if we didn’t “fit in” as we knew a lot of people who went to different churches because of the social functions, youth group etc… My point to her was that isn’t why we are going to Church is it? The hard answer to that is no, of course not. But when you have been Protestant your whole life, going to hang out is a big part of it. We have so many friends in different denominations who don’t believe 90% of with their church teaches… but like the Sunday School class or their kids like the youth group… it’s not about God, it’s about their enjoyment.
We go to Mass to Worship God.
After some ups and downs my wife eventually described our Easter Vigil and joining the Church was one of the greatest days of her life that she will cherish forever.
Six months before that she was still unsure at times and there have been times in the last 2 years I have heard the phrase “I even became Catholic for you…” to which I response…“did you really?” the answer is always the same, no I became Catholic because I believe it… with the reminder “it sure was easier being a Protestant” Yea… it was but that’s not what it’s about right?
(Please note for the regular viewers the discussion between my wife and I on this is always for the same reason… no child care at Church. Many other Parishes in the area offer it for the Youngest during Mass. My wife’s reason is that she feels like she has the wonderful opportunity to Worship God and misses out on it wrestling with the kids so it’s not really a theological issue, heh)
As I said… PRAY PRAY PRAY. My wife’s grandfather was a Baptist Minister and her Cousin’s Husband is a Baptist Youth minister at one of those BIG churches. While we expected it and I’ve been ready to test my Apologetic skills… never really had anything negative said in the family… at least not to our face.
Keep praying for her, keep her in RCIA and you guys discuss it. My wife was warned by her mom not to marry a Catholic because they would make her convert. As I was considering becoming a Presbyterian Minister when we were dating, I’m sure she thought her daughter was “safe” hah. But Truth be told, her mother came to the Easter Vigil with us and love it. Talk about it but once again, pray, let God show her what He has shown you.