Our DD turned 18 in May. Was Home schooled, good kid, not much trouble, active pro life, very vocal against Culture of death. Never dated… was thinking of being a missionary. Everyone she knew is shocked. And she has dumped all her Friends esp the Catholic ones. Never dated. Though we did not disallow it after she turned 17.
She had been working since Dec saving money for car and college. Got an Apt… moved into it. Cut off communication with mom and dad immediately. Moved in with 25 yr old man a few days later… Told mom and Dad that " we have been shoving religion down her throat. " and that if we talked to her about her life or GOD she would hang up. Also said we are to restrictive and we better not restrict our other children ( ages 9 and under) like we did her ( this means no r rated movies or S@xually charged music, or cell phone)
months go by limited short contact. Now has cut off all contact with us the parents. Moved to a unknown location.
I could go into more detail but it not necessary.
Mom and Dad… we were trying to approach the issue like the Father in the prodigal son parable.
BUT … enter the Grandparents. She talks to them, they take her and her boyfriend ( shackin up) to dinner once a month. She calls and asks them for money when she runs out…They give her stuff. they intend to sell her a car soon.
We have asked them to stop as we see it as supporting their bad behavior. GrandP’s know she is not attending Mass anymore etc.
Two different priests told us that we have to let her go her own way, but we still have small children to protect from the scandal and the BF should not be around the children etc. In short if she can’t behave then she should not be around the children ( the priests got full detail) We went to our parish priest and then to another mutally respected priest so we could try to get the GP’s on the same page. That priest agreed with the first priest.
We are not SHUNNING… you can not shun someone who has already shunned or shut you out of their life. But our lifestyles are so different now. We love her… we would help her return. We are just so frightened for her soul. I would talk to her if she called. I would make small talk and remind her that GOD and us love her. there is not animosity on our side of it.
So the Grandp’s, what I thought were Conservative Roman Catholics ( they wont “go” to a lay minister, they wont hardly speak to homosexual members of our family) now have gotten a priest of their own to tell them " that Granddaughter’s sex life is none of their business" and that they can take them out and stuff.
This is causing great conflict. M y parents accuse us of shunning… but were not. they see her as a victim here… and tell us we are being unforgiving etc. See above… no animosity here.
Our phone number has not changed, our address has not changed. I have called her several times and told her if she needed help to call. That we loved her. Most of the time she will not return our calls.
First, if this priest is right…that it is none of our business… why did our priest call it Scandal? Also… if it is not our B… then why would homosexuals openly practicing be our business? Why would we get upset if PP wants to teach $ex ed ?
The RCCathchism says not to encourage sin? so
I mean If i look hard enough I can find a Priest to tell me Birth control is up to my conscious. Did they just pick a winner?
So how do we honor our parents and disagree so strongly?
any advice would be good
** I mentioned lay ministers above. I personally do not think they are a " bad " thing. I was just tryng to point out that the GP behavior is ususally very … strict. I dont always agree with my parents… but this particular disagreement is so severe.