Need answer fast!


#1

Hey everyone,
I had a quick question. First the story. My girlfriend lives a couple hours from my place and when she comes down to visit, she tries to stay at a friends of ours (who is a girl). When I come up and visit her, this same friend comes and the two of them share one bedroom and I use another (I talked to a preist of opus dei and he said this is fine as long as we do not have issues if you cacth my drift). My problem is that my girlfriend wants to come down to spend thanksgiving with me and my grandma, but she has to work on friday and worries about all the driving (with snow on the ground) to and from my place by herself. My friend cannot help out this time. Would it be wrong for me to accompany her back and stay over a night (using seperate rooms of course) or since we are only doing it for one night and know we wouldnt seek to do anything, it would be okay and not an occasion of sin. Thanks for the help in advance.


#2

You are NOT going to stay in the same room, right?

You are going to pray before you drive anywhere…not just because you will be alone but because you will be driving with snow all over the ground and you want to be safe.

What does your Priest think? Call him and ask him…he sounds like a fine spiritual director and he knows you BEST…

You and she are in my prayers…


#3

Another thing you need to consider is that seeing you two spend the night together might cause scandal for others. If I were in your shoes, I would skip Thanksgiving with her this year. If she’s indeed The One for you, you’ll have many Thanksgivings together when you’re married.


#4

[quote=DailyBread]Hey everyone,
I had a quick question. First the story. My girlfriend lives a couple hours from my place and when she comes down to visit, she tries to stay at a friends of ours (who is a girl). When I come up and visit her, this same friend comes and the two of them share one bedroom and I use another (I talked to a preist of opus dei and he said this is fine as long as we do not have issues if you cacth my drift). My problem is that my girlfriend wants to come down to spend thanksgiving with me and my grandma, but she has to work on friday and worries about all the driving (with snow on the ground) to and from my place by herself. My friend cannot help out this time. Would it be wrong for me to accompany her back and stay over a night (using seperate rooms of course) or since we are only doing it for one night and know we wouldnt seek to do anything, it would be okay and not an occasion of sin. Thanks for the help in advance.
[/quote]

I wouldnt. I say that for two reason. The main one is that if you spend the night at her place people are going to assume you are sleeping with her. The other has to do with “occassions of sin”. You would be puting both yourself and your girlfriend in a situation rife with tempatation.


#5

Are you familiar with the Sacred Heart Auto League? We haven’t had an accident since we’ve become members :slight_smile: www.shl.org


#6

I don’t remember Jesus being too concerned about what other people thought. If they have dirty minds or can’t imagine anyone acting chaste, that is their problem, not yours.

And personally, I don’t think you have a problem here. It doesn’t sound like you are so out of control that you couldn’t keep your hands off each other. You’re going to be in different rooms. I don’t see why you should be apart for the holiday because you have to share a two bedroom house/apt.


#7

[quote=koda]I don’t remember Jesus being too concerned about what other people thought. If they have dirty minds or can’t imagine anyone acting chaste, that is their problem, not yours.

And personally, I don’t think you have a problem here. It doesn’t sound like you are so out of control that you couldn’t keep your hands off each other. You’re going to be in different rooms. I don’t see why you should be apart for the holiday because you have to share a two bedroom house/apt.
[/quote]

I would think that if he loves and repsects his girlfriend he would not want to sully her reputation. And mark my words that is exactly what will happen if he spends the noght at her place.


#8

Avoid the occassion of sin and have a wonderful Thanksgiving with your grandmother. :thumbsup:


#9

Don’t forget that St. Paul tells us that even though we may not be doing wrong, we shouldn’t do something that will cause others to sin. (See I Corinthians). You don’t know who is looking up to you for being in what sounds like a wonderful chaste relationship, and how that person may be affected if he or she perceives you entering what looks like a sinful action.

I agree with the poster who said that if it is true love, you will have many Thanksgivings to spend together when you are married. I know its hard and that you don’t want to be apart, but if the only way to be together is to stay in the same place with no chaperone, I say spend Thanksgiving apart. God bless you for seeking to do the correct and moral thing!


#10

Thanks for the response. I was not able to contact my priest, but I was already leaning towards what many of you said. Doing a thought experiment, I would not a future son or daughter to do that unless it was some type of unavoidable emergency that required that. We are just doing dinner in the afternoon so she has plenty of time to drive home while not being too late. Thanks and Happy Thanksgiving, prayers to all.


#11

[quote=DailyBread]Thanks for the response. I was not able to contact my priest, but I was already leaning towards what many of you said. Doing a thought experiment, I would not a future son or daughter to do that unless it was some type of unavoidable emergency that required that. We are just doing dinner in the afternoon so she has plenty of time to drive home while not being too late. Thanks and Happy Thanksgiving, prayers to all.
[/quote]

Happy Thanksgiving to you both! May you be richly blessed for your faithfulness. It warms my heart!
:slight_smile: CM


#12

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.